British toilets are really badly designed, you can't poo without it ploping in water and splashing
ethicsgalore · 09/07/2015 09:57
I think toilets here are a really bad design. Why don't they have the style of toilet where you poo onto a slant without water and the hole is right at the front? I want to import a toilet. Fed up of making a nest out of paper that jams the system.
2rebecca · 09/07/2015 10:13
What is the big deal with getting a couple of drops of water on your bum? You wipe them off with toilet paper. If I'm at home I'll use the bidet afterwards but you sound overly paranoid about getting your bum splashed, but then lots of people on mumsnet seem to have weird toilet related hang ups.
Stop jamming up the toilet with paper have a poo wipe your bum then wash your hands. Job (and jobee) done. It doesn't have to be complicated.
TightWadBastard · 09/07/2015 10:17
Don't even get me started on toilets.
Why have they changed the design of the toilet seats so that you can't change them yourself without having to take the whole bloody thing apart? What happened to those loo seats you could slip through the toilet pan itself and tighten up from the bottom (excuse my terminology there)??
My crappy EX plumber fitted this gob shite loo. When I complained that the flush button was halfway down the cistern and the fking loo seat came off after 3 days (8 year old boy is NOT to blame) he walked off the job and said it would be unprofessional of him to come back and fix it. He said that with NO SENSE of irony.
And look - the bloody toilet pan is so bloody long that YES, the bloody turds just sit there winking at me, saying "Your life is shit. Your life is shit."
VenusRising · 09/07/2015 10:38
I love American loos. Nice and low, and with water in the shallow bowl, so your poo is immediately underwater, so no smells or splashes.
Then when you flush, whoosh all water vortexes down and hey presto, you have a clean bowl as the poo never touched it!
I also like a bidet attachment, Japanese style.
However, I also like squat toilets......
The worst are these high throne porcelain crappers where there is a tiny amount of water far down in the ubend, and you have to scrape your poo down if you've missed the sweet spot. These kinds of loos need a toilet brush for poo poking
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