Are my dresses unreasonable for the school run?

[MyNameIsPinkiePie]

I wore the black dress yesterday (see pics) and got a filthy stare off a woman pushing a buggy on the school pick up. I don't think I had my kids with me at that point. I later wore the dress to a Christian youth group, in fact I wore it to the office earlier the same day and it seemed fine. Today I had both kids on the way to school, I was wearing the dark red dress with a black cardigan. I got another long glare from the same woman, it was her staring that made me realise it was her again! I wouldn't wear the dark red dress to the office and I have pinned it to make it less low on the bust. They are both soft jersey dresses. But are they really that bad and does it make a difference whether I'm a mother or on the school run as to whether these outfits are appropriate?

A woman of 35 to 40 is not going to want to start chatting to another parent she perceives to be under 25 if not less.

I'm 45 and I'll talk to people of any age. I'll chat to someone of 25 as readily as someone of 65.

Lateswim - probably fiveofcups. Posted some very nasty comments.

What's the bollocks about not taking to those younger than you.

Hilarious.

Thanks Grunt this thread has almost taken my mind off the heat.

You're welcome Lateswim16. I have hardly moved from the study today, as that's the coolest room, and there has been an electric fan pointed at me all day too. However, my insane daughter did 2 hours of kickboxing from 6 till 8 this evening, in a gym with no air-conditioning! They were weighed before and after to see how much they lost in sweat and she lost .8 of a kilo, that's about 2lbs!

Ahem. Sorry for digressing.

I don't understand why everyone who criticised or spoke badly about the op is being accused of jealousy by some posters. I think the op's posts are weird. The assumption that the woman was staring at her because of her dress is weird, mentioning the woman is a muslim is weird, randomly talking about her age or how young she looks is weird. None of those things seemed to be coherently linked. It's all bloody weird.

It is a weird thread, shipshape I agree.

Some comments have been nasty though - going on about the OP's bedroom etc. It looks like a nice room to me, her sheets might need straightening but she's hardly Tracy Emin

I once saw a lady in a onesie on the school run and I couldn't help thinking she looked like a tellytubby. Otherwise I don't take a lot of notice.

Lovely wallpaper BTW.

Op, this just made me think about today's school run. I can't think of a single outfit I saw on anybody today and I hung around and chatted to quite a few parents. I wouldn't worry, nobody gives a shit. must look tomorrow and do approving and disapproving stares

Pagwatch, do you not think you, and various other posters who seem to be implying that the OP us narcissistic, are perhaps taking the original question too seriously? FFS, she just asked if there might be a problem with her outfit.

Yes some of the comments were very rude, I agree. I also feel that anyone who thinks op's room is a mess needs to come and visit my house!

I rarely take much notice, either, Biscuits but I did do a double take when out shopping, the other day at a youngish woman, not in the best of shape (ie similar to mine!) wearing distressed denim shorts and a slightly too short white strappy vest (not a problem in itself on a warm day even if it wasn't particularly flattering) with a long sheer black nylon batman vest stretched over the top of everything. That final touch just elevated the whole look to tragic.

I rarely venture beyond "she looks cold" unless something is pretty much out there. Or knickers are on show.

OP, if the lady stares again, and if you have the confidence, try smiling back at her, or say hello, and see what happens. (Sorry if someone's already suggested that.)

There's a mum at school who I've managed to look grumpy at several times when she's smiled at me - I've just happened to be in a massive stress when I caught her eye. So I'm actively trying to smile at her now but, unsurprisingly she's avoiding eye contact! She's probably assumed I don't like her but definitely not true.

ouryve , see I think I would have given her extra credit for promoting a positive, crimefighting, role model! (I'd prefer Batman to Nicki Minaj!)

Heck, this would have snapped me out of my school run trance! And most days (not today) I would have thought she looked cold :o

I thought the troll op had been led away in chains... Or have I read Dawn's message wrong?

Eh no, fiveofcups who came on the thread and immediately started firing nasty insults at the op was 'escorted from the premises' by mnhq as a previously banned poster.

Mnhq have actually asked everyone to behave like adults towards the op, and have made no suggestion that she is a troll.

Op, I hope you have maybe hidden this thread now, or are managing to ignore the bile and put it all into perspective - if you're still reading, having your anxiety and esteem issues looked at, possibly by your gp, might not be a bad idea. It's horrible to go around feeling persecuted and paranoid but it doesn't have to be like that. And if the woman is staring at you, well that is her problem and not yours. Your clothes are perfectly appropriate. I spend the months from October to April in a pair of denim cut offs and a strappy vest, or little sundress (live in aus), school run included, and did right up until 9 mths pg with ds3&4. I've got faaaaarrr from a perfect figure, far from it. And have suffered in the past from crippling anxiety. And although that hasn't gone, not by a long shot, and never will - I have learned to ignore people who look at me (which they probably don't) and consider it their problem, not mine.

And thank you, TheHumblePotato, I will.

Oh, sorry . Misunderstood...

I couldn't give much of a fuck what other people wear and imagine most other people are probably the same.

Nobody in the world would pay attention to what are frankly very dull dresses to the extent of being jealous or judgemental.

She was probably looking at you wondering why you were posing in such a ridiculous way. Or wasn't actually looking at you at all.

Stop being so needy!

This thread is one of those peculiarly female things.

I have NEVER heard a man complaining about being looked at/blanked/snubbed/treated badly (insert any interaction) by another man and be told 'they're probably jealous of you'.

Why do so many of us women think that may be behind our treatment by other women?.

That's not a question I expect to be answered BTW, just something I hear a lot and was musing why it apparently doesn't feature in male interactions.

I think it's because there is a lot of vitriol towards women who are very good looking, or have nice figures, and may wear clothes to enhance or show off that figure. Sadly, I think jealousy is an emotion which has been bread into (a lot of) women.

I've never been sneered at or criticised by a man for what I'm wearing or how I have my hair, but I've been openly laughed/sneered at/mocked by a group of women who I had the misfortune to work with. It did come across as some sort of bitter jealousy, although god knows why.

The dresses are alright. Can't say I would look twice. I don't often notice what people wear to the school run. Iv never seeneed anything out of the ordinary that stood out.

Perhaps she was jealous and looking at you wishing she could be wearing something like you were because of the heat. She'd of been roasting today in this heat.

Who actually cares, the people the OP has to deal with are probably not even worth a second thought, why should she care, self confidence should be taught from an early age. Just remember if they are talking about you they are leaving someone else alone! If it's a stealth job, try harder!

How old do you think Poole think you are. If you are 32 then it's suprising if people think you are less than 18 - at that age it's a huge difference.