AIBU to think people should say what they fucking mean?

[LashesandLipstick]

Inspired by threads in which I was told asking a question is rude because "people feel awkward saying no" and "if the person wants to, offer to do it yourself and if they want to they'll tell you not to and offer instead"

AIBU to think people shouldn't play these stupid games? Just say what you mean for Christs sake. I'm sure an adult can take you politely saying no to a request. All this does is cause confusion and create weird social norms that make no sense and confuse the hell out of people who aren't neurotypical or who are foreign.

Stop it.

Eg "do these jeans make my arse look big?"

Me "they kind of make your arse look big yeah, if you like them though wear them"

My dad "yes they do actually. Your other jeans are much nicer

Interestingly, I think your dad's formulation is much kinder and more constructive.

Jassy go into a school and ask 6th formers if they know John Nash or Kim Kardashisn? I'm confident most will only know the latter.

So what?

Your choice of John Nash is interesting. There are a lot of Nobel Prize winners, whose work is of greater and lesser (in the long run) importance. Nash equilibria are of great importance, but so are a lot of other Nobel Prize winners' work.

John Nash was also the subject of a popular film starring Russell Crowe, which meant that people heard of him via the very celebrity route you affect to despise.

Could you tell us how many other Nobel Prize winners in Economics from the 1990s you could talk about, without resorting to Wikipedia? Because my guess is "zero" and the only reason you know more about Nash than a putative sixth former is that they're too young to have seen a minor film made in 2001. Were you an expert on Nash Equilibria before 2001?

In fact, could you tell us (without resort to Wikipedia) the importance of Nash's work? Or are you just dropping the name? Perhaps you could tell us about the difference between weak and strict equilibria?

fictionalised accounts of Denise Bloch and Tommy Yeo-Thomas.

Christ: French Resistance slash fiction? That sounds quite a thing.

knowing who Denise Bloch was without looking it up. I guess I'm not one of Lash's sixth formers.

Christ: French Resistance slash fiction? That sounds quite a thing.

I wish I still had it somewhere. I'm sure it was all terribly earnest and excruciating.

I'm sure it was all terribly earnest

Good. I was thinking it might be...no, best not.

Gemauve I've never seen the film. No I couldn't because my interest in him isn't down to his Nobel prize rather his illness and how he managed it, as I have an interest in MH, and how society perceives it. I think it's important people realise people withMH issues are intelligent, compassionate members of society and not terrifying axe murderers like some think

Would it have been better if I'd mentioned John Locke as someone I think it's important to know about? Or Jeremy Bentham?

Good. I was thinking it might be...no, best not.

So that's no, you don't know anything about Nash Equilibria.

I think it's important people realise people with MH issues are intelligent, compassionate members of society

I work on the assumption that everyone is an intelligent, compassionate member of society. I'm not the one dismissing large portions of the population as thick.

Would it have been better if I'd mentioned John Locke as someone I think it's important to know about? Or Jeremy Bentham?

I have no idea: dropping names of well-known thinkers probably looked good on your personal statement when applying for a philosophy degree, but most of us get over it when we grow up. Yes, well-read people should, and do, know about both; I'm not sure I'd go as far as "important", particularly of Locke, but then I defer to your expertise in the matter. I'm rather lost track of what point you're trying to prove: "I can drop some names I don't know much about, sixth formers can't, therefore I'm clever?"

Aspie here.

OP, you're making a tit of yourself.

Being on the spectrum means your brain works differently - it doesn't mean you're some kind of fount of insight and sensible thinking. As you are most eloquently demonstrating here.

My ASD means I am LESS good at guessing other people's motivations and though processes, not better at it than everyone else, as you appear to think you are.

I HATE the thought of unintentionally upsetting someone because I've missed some social subtlety. Yes, our way of thinking can be a great advantage in some situations but I don't think pontificating on what's wrong with social conventions in a pompous manner is one of them. You're making a fool of yourself and you're making other people with ASD look bad. Go educate yourself properly if you're so intelligent and ahead of the game. Oh and while you're at it, maybe thank the posters here who have bothered to try and explain the convention to you rather than sneering at them for being 'sheep'

See, I can be straight up too

"Would it have been better if I'd mentioned John Locke as someone I think it's important to know about? Or Jeremy Bentham?"

What about William Marshal? Or Thomas Baker? Or Mary Anning? Can you tell me about them without consulting Google. If not I'm going to have to dismiss you as unthinking.

Aspie here.

OP, you're making a tit of yourself.

That is the kind of directness I like.

Gemauve that wasn't my point. My point was I bet most people know more about celebrities than people who have made a contribution. They were examples - I'm very ignorant about nuclear energy but if someone knew a lot about it vs the subjects I know a bit about, I wouldn't dismiss them as unthinking. I'm not saying you literally have to know those 3 people!

Knit cool that's your opinion. Not offended in the slightest. And no I'm not, we're different people. You don't speak for me and I dont speak for you, so anyone who thinks I'm an arse and uses that as a reason to think everyone with ASD is an arse is the real idiot. I have thanked posters who said things that were interesting and made sense. Not all of them did.

Saskia what exactly is that trying to prove? I've never claimed to know everything about everyone ever. No one can. Nor have I claimed to be more intelligent than everyone. I've only said that I think for myself vs following the crowd. God knows why that's so offensive

OP, you sound like you are trying to use your ASD as a reason for your behaviour and attitude, so yes, I do think you're giving a bad impression of what people with ASD are like. As you say, we are all different. Thank goodness

What about William Marshal?

Now his life would make a pretty good Russell Crowe film. His childhood alone (I still have the anvil, and so on) would be ripping stuff.

Also just FWIW - I wasn't trying to offend you, so that's neither here nor there. I was trying to get you to consider a point of view other than your own, which you seem incapable of doing.

KnitFast I've said my ASD is the reason I prefer more directness and don't pick up on things instinctively. I've never said it's the reason I think society is crap.

Guess what, like people who are NT, ND people are as varied as everyone else. We won't all get on, we won't all be similar.

We won't all get on, we won't all be similar.

You've got that right. You sound insufferable and pompous.

Good luck to you anyway - if your way of behaving works for you, fine. But if we're all individuals as you say, why start a thread demanding everyone else become more similar to your way of thinking?

My point was I bet most people know more about celebrities than people who have made a contribution.

So what? Given you don't appear to have the first idea about Nash's contribution, why is knowing his name and that he was mentally ill something you're so proud of? Could you point to the fundamental difference between Locke and Bentham over Natural Law? No? So what does knowing their name and that they are well-known philosophers buy you?

I'm very ignorant about nuclear energy but if someone knew a lot about it vs the subjects I know a bit about, I wouldn't dismiss them as unthinking.

Phew! I can sketch out the energy transfers involved in U235 + n goes to Ba141 + Kr92 +3n, and if I dredge around a bit I might even be able to tell you why U235 is fissile and U238 isn't, so I'm safe! Thanks for the vote of confidence!

Knit I didn't think you were trying to offend me, no offence has been taken. Just because I don't agree doesn't mean I haven't considered it. I think people here seem to think if the majority disagree and you don't change your mind, you're being difficult

I think for myself vs following the crowd. God knows why that's so offensive

You really can't see why that's so offensive and arrogant? Sheesh, talk about a complete lack of insight.

I even gave you a cartoon and stuff.

anyone who thinks I'm an arse and uses that as a reason to think everyone with ASD is an arse is the real idiot

Not a single person here has said "lashes you're an arse and therefore all people with MH issues are arses". You're an arse just because you are, no one's extrapolating how you behave and applying it to everyone else.

Gemauve I actually know quite a bit about the last two, I studied them in a good bit of depth a couple of years ago, as philosophy is a topic I enjoy. If you REALLY want to debate philosophy, we can make a new thread for that. So I'm not just name dropping philosophers, if I was I'd use the monty Python song.

Okay? I don't understand why you've said that, I never personally said YOU were an idiot.

Cassie that was in response to saying "you'll make people with ASD look bad". If you're going to criticise me at least look at the context of the post!

Gemauve I don't see why it's offensive, no. You can disagree, you can argue my views on society are negative and untrue, you can claim im wrong - but I don't see why you'd be offended.