to think this is ridiculously grabby?

[queentroutoftrouts]

I have received a baby shower invitation via Facebook from an acquaintance and she has listed various requests including
please bring size 4 nappies and wipes
£10 cash or vouchers for next and mother care, NO PRESENTS PLEASE
£10 entry fee and at the bottom she has added 'men allowed'
Is this the done thing nowadays then or aibu to be shocked at how entitled she is being? Since when did you charge guests to attend your baby shower?
The size 4 nappies are presumably for her elder child unless she is giving birth to a giant.

I propose we start a trend for "starting school" and "hitting puberty" showers.

I like that reni!

Maybe OP should answer the invite with a counter invite to whatever milestone is upcoming for her? Make it ridiculous and really expensive, Abercrombie & Fitch gift list, bottle of Krug to bring please.

Lion, in the nicest possible way, this thread is about an absurd invitation to an event at which the hostess expects guests to bring a gift specified by her and pay for the privilege.

It's not about whether wish lists are a good thing, or the behaviour of your nutty friend.

Holy Lord... I'd stay the hell away!!

I love gift lists or even better gift registries. makes the job of picking a gift easier because I know the couple/mum to be will like it.

For £10 I would be expecting a bit more than a few sandwiches and some lemonade so maybe she has something special planned. Perhaps she has been doing pregnancy belly dancing or maybe she has heard about a live birth thread and thought she would go one better.

I love the "Men Allowed" Be careful you ladies don't get crushed in the stampede...

I missed the flyer. Is the baby shower at her house?

The only way I can see an "entry fee" being in any way reasonable is if the baby shower is an afternoon tea at a hotel type thing, where the venue are charging £10 per head. But I guess that would be described differently to an entry fee.

And I don't have a problem with gift lists. It's nice to know that you're getting something the recipient will like. As long as it's not presented in a "you MUST buy this" sort of way.

My DSIS in law has been reading this thread and just sent me a copy of invite her DD got. I am I think it might be equally and POSSIBLY EVEN MORE grabby (MN Jury - feel free to judge)

It's not the same thing (kids party) but we have copied out the exact words (can't upload as covered with pics of birthday girls face). And they are:

XXX IS 10
To celebrate XXX hitting double digits, we’re throwing the most awesome party EVER!!!!
Don’t miss out on:
Bouncy castle
LIVE petting zoo
And magic tricks (from a quite famous magician!!!!!!!)
DISCO

On: Saturday August 29th
At: XXXXXXXXXXXXX
From: 3-7pm

The best bit is that YOUR (sic) INVITED
Please come along and make XXX’s day as special as she is.

We are sure that you will understand that as this is such an extravagant do, we are asking for a small contribution from each guest of £5 (siblings are £8 for the pair)

BUT this will include hot dogs, snacks and drinks as well as all the treats above!

XXX is a very lucky girl and already has lots of brilliant stuff. She would really like a MacBook Air, so instead of gifts, please by (sic) a PC World voucher for as much as you can afford.

Hope to see you there!!!
RSVP: XXXXXXXXXXXXX

but it's ok because the magician is 'quite' famous'

I bet loads of families were 'busy' that day. Kin 'ell.

My first thought is, if you know its such an extravagant do, then why are you doing it?

But on the other hand, at this age i usually give birthday dc about £15, so £5 for contribution to the party, then £10 towards planet Air book whatever. Job done!

Live petting Zoo experience, made me laugh!

Nettletheelf I know it is different to what actually happened at my shower, but very similar to the thread nutty friend started about me saying I was demanding gifts from the list. I missed the 'flyer' though so it is obviously a real thing and hopefully not some troll.

Presumably the entry fee would be cheaper if it was a dead petting zoo

they could halve their costs buy cutting out the Zoo crap, or the magician, just do disco and bouncy if must or do the famous magician and bouncy castle...how much entertainment do a bunch of 10yr olds need

Sorry, I haven't read the whole thread, but have we done any suggested replies from queentrout yet?

May I submit the following:

"Hi hun (I feel sure the hun is appropriate here) can I just check what the entry fee gets me? Do I get a discount on the entry fee if my man comes? Oh and you did realise that size 4 nappies will be too big for bubba, even if its a biggun?"

slightly that is pretty cheeky.

I bet the family have no idea it is though

i assumed by 'LIVE" was their clumsy way of saying they were bringing the Zoo to the house, but mrsallergy has interpreted it literally i'm beginning to wonder

Mintyy great reply

I suppose you can sort of understand them asking for a £5 contribution considering they must be paying a fortune for all this entertainment. It's kind of like taking them all to a theme park or something.

What gets me with this one though is the request for a PC World Voucher for 'as much as you can afford'. No - supergrabby.

If its costing a fortune, then you simply don't do it, nobody's putting a gun to their heads.. haven't some people ever heard of 'cutting your coat to your size'?

That party invite is horrible -

Why not just have a more restrained 10th birthday party? I don't understand these people. Do they want to pretend to be Kim 'n' Kanye or something?

If so, I think it's in very poor taste to try to co-opt the guests into it with the 'contribution' to the 'extravagant' party. It's shameless actually. As for asking for the PC world vouchers...I'd take delight in buying the kid something entirely different in the unlikely event that I was prepared to pay an entry fee to go to a birthday party.

Am I being dense? (It does happen) wouldn't the parents at the child's party be better to abandon the petting zoo (live or not), tell the quite famous magician they are not required, have a nice fun party for dcand put the money saved towards Air Book? Any gifts people want to give, Nice, but no pressure.

surely for the cost of the party they could have brought a mac book air! and a mac book air for a 10yr old is a lot. A laptop I can kind of understand but a £1000+ one!!!! ds2 got a chromebook for £200 for his 13th birthday and it does everything he wants/needs it to and more. He'd be over the moon with a mac book but we'd be paying 5 x the cost for an apple on the front!