AIBU to want to write a very strong worded letter of complaint to Mcdonalds?

[LookingforRainbows]

So this happened yesterday at a Mcdonalds in London:

We were in the queue buying lunch, and my dsis needed to use the toilet. She has a 'hidden' disability and requires the disabled toilet for her needs, but the disabled toilet was locked, fair enough, stop everyone from using it and protects it for people who need it, like my sister. So, dsis went to ask a member of staff if it could be opened for her.
Well, just our luck that she happened to ask a complete bitch. The staff member told my dsis that she could not use it as she wasn't disabled. Ok, fair enough she didn't know. So my sister then explained to her that she does have a disability but it's a 'hidden' disability, and she will need to use the disabled toilet because of it. The girl gave my sister a horrid look (which I saw and at this point I came over) and said, 'you don't have a disability, you look perfectly fine to me to use the toilets downstairs' Again, my sis explained that her disability is hidden, so you wouldn't 'see' it or realised it, but it still required her to use the disabled toilet. The girl then said, well if you can't see it, then it can't be that bad so you can use the toilets downstairs and in the time you have spent trying to get into this toilet you could have finished the queue for the downstairs toilets (!!!!!!!!!) my sister politely said, 'what do you class as a disability here?'. The staff replied, 'you have to be in a wheelchair, or have something wrong with your legs so you can't get down the stairs'.
My sister replied, 'well I think you need to go on some disability awareness training, because some people, like me, have disabilities that are nothing to do with their legs and still need to use the disabled toilet.' The girl then asked my sister very rudely, 'what is your disability then? Because I can't see anything wrong with you' (!!!!)
My sis did not want to publically announce her disability to the whole of Macdonalds, but the total irony was that we had just finished doing the London Walk for Crohn's and Colitis and we were still wearing our tshirts!! So my sister said, if you want to know my disability, look at my tshirt, we have just come back from doing a charity walk for my disability, yet here we are being discriminated against because of it! The girl said, 'I'm not discriminating against you I just don't understand why you can't use the toilets downstairs, otherwise everyone will want this toilet unlocked for them.

I could not believe my ears at the rudeness of this young lady. My sister was absolutely humiliated (we were in public) and she was looking at us like a piece of shit.

So we told her to get the manager.
She huffed rudely 'fine!'.
We stood waiting by the disabled toilet and people were looking at us.
When the manager arrived with her, she said to the manager (before either of us could speak) these people can't be bothered to queue for the toilets downstairs- and she is saying that she is disabled.
And at this point my sister interrupted, 'excuse me I can speak for myself thank you very much!' We then explained to the manager what had happened etc. the manager did not ask any awkward questions or give us any funny looks, he simply took the key and opened the door and smiled and said no problem.

He was then extremely apologetic, and asked if we wanted anything free, but we had already bought out meals and to be honest after this incident we didn't even want to eat our food as it had left a bad taste in our mouth. I did see the manager take the member if staff aside and talk to her, but it didn't seem like she was being reprimanded.

Anyways, even this morning, thinking about it has got me livid and worked up. The irony that even when you are wearing a tshirt for Crohn's, you can still get prejudice right in front of your face!!

My sister wants me to help her write a strongly worded letter, as I often write letters of complaint for my work and it's my forte, but DH says that because the manager was apologetic and offered us a free food (which we had declined) we have no leg to stand on and we should just leave it....

AIBU to still be livid?

YANBU to write your letter. I wouldn't assume the manager has or has not dealt with it, but I feel there is no harm to go higher in this circumstance. They are a large corporation they will already have various disability awareness courses, documentation and training in place, this member of staff needs reminding of it.

Yes I would complain.

Life is hard enough for people with disabilities (hidden or not) without ignorance making things even harder.

I would complain firmly but politely. I would set out in your letter what you are wanting which is not free food, money etc but that Mcdonalds review their disability training with their staff. Offer, if you or your sister feel able, to attend some sessions with managers so they can hear first hand the problems caused by such attitudes. Ask them to keep you up to date with how the retraining is going.

I always complain to companies in this way. It costs them a lot of money and time to look at their processes and hopefully improves things for the future for other people.

Thank you for all the responses, I am going out now so won't be able to respond for a while so please don't feel like I posted and disappeared.

Yes complain! There's lots they can do, staff training for starters.

Altinkum, it wasn't radar locked, it was actually locked with a key that staff had

The employee didn't handle the situation well I agree but what was the reason she couldn't use the toilets downstairs?

The point is that she needed to use it and nobody, including the OP on this thread, should be expected to explain why.

My DD2 has AS and we have a Radar key which we use if necessary, which it isn't always the case. I don't think I should have to explain why we use it to anyone, ever.

CAspie, great advice.

Should the toilets ever be locked to radar Keys? And if it was for whatever reason surely showing a member of staff your radar key should have been enough for them to open it?

That's disgusting. Definitely complain.

I have a hidden disability and sometimes need to use the disabled toilets. I've had 2 incidents where people have been ignorant about it. Disgusting ableist behaviour and needs to be addressed

Yes that's a good point. If the toilet is locked then a radar key should gain entry even if that means someone else unlocks it. But surely depending on the time of day, finding a member of staff or catching their eye from he back of the queue, explaining, them vanishing off the get the key from the back of the drawer...It would all take too long.

I still maintain the manager does not come out of this smelling of roses. Any complaint should be factual, yes he dealt with it, but he shares the blame.

Btw op you've also got me thinking about equality (not just disability) in the work I do and how well we meet the needs of various groups of people. So thank you.

Definitely complain. I've complained to macdonaldd on two ooccasions! (And I'm not a serial complainer!) They were very proactive in dealing with the complaints.

Yes you need to complain but do point out the manager did deal with it when their attention was drawn to the situation.

Thank you for saying why she needed to use the toilet. It helps people to understand what a hidden disability can be. Some of us have no idea.

There needs to be a much greater awareness of this issue. I'm sorry you had to go through this, definitely write a letter.

What horrible behaviour from the female employee but you don't know that the manager didn't reprimand her later, he would be very wrong to do it where others could overhear.

The manager dealt with the issue in a positive and dignified way and offered complimentary food. Really what else could he do.

Perhaps you could look into getting dsis a radar key and a 'Just can't wait' toilet card. It must be difficult to effectively 'police' accessible toilet facilities.

I work for McDonald's and this would never have got to that point here, the staff member needs training and disciplining.
Do check though op if the restaurant is owned by McDonald's or franchised, there are slightly different ways of complaining if you want to go higher than branch level.
This will be taken seriously if you complain, good luck:)

The Equality and Human rights commission could help you I think in wording an letter in relation to the legislation being breached (the Equality Act - this replaced the disability discrimination act DDA)). You should complain in order to emphasise the need for training. You handled the situation so well. I bet u feel exhausted and drained :) x

I'm not being judgey but is a Maccy-D really a good meal for someone with Crohn's/Colitis?

McDonalds are really good with complaints if you make the effort to deal with them and they reward good staff, not just take them to task for problems.

They need to know that there is a training issue as the manager only has so much influence in what training staff are given.

But outwith that - I'd definitely try and complain as much as you possibly can - I hate them with a passion.

I think a lot of people are missing the point here. The complaint was not 'dealt with at the time' with the offer of free food. Not everyone is after some freebies as a resolution to their complaint.

In this instance, I would complain and the only resolution I'd be interested in is assurance that this is not the agreed policy, and if it is, what they would do to rectify that. Free food has nothing to do with it. The attitude of the staff member needs to be addressed, the behaviour on display here sounds disgusting.

And doreenlethal, yes you are being judgey that is absolutely none of your business.

I would write a letter.
But make sure there are two parts.
First explain about the rude lady, asking for extra training for her and maybe a refresher course for all staff.
Second, praise the manager and his actions, so they know you aren't being a total moron.
Yanbu. Not every disability is obvious.
I never really gave it much thought until I had dd, with her struggles.

Wouldn't it just be simpler if she had said?