To start a thread for grumpy old ladies who think things aren't what they used to be

[susanstryingterm]

I'm probably a bit older than the average age on here, and totally emphasised with someone who said, in slightly despairing tones on a thread yesterday 'I sometimes think nobody knows how to behave anymore'.

So:

I think children should stand up for older (60+) people on public transport.
I think weddings should be a 'cut your cloth to suit your measure' exercise.
I think children should be called in by 9pm at latest during the Summer, so that neighbours can get some consideration.

Oh heck - I feel as though I've found my spiritual home....
Agree with about 95% of what's been said on here - the other 5% comes from me shamefacedly knowing that if smart phones and the Internet had been around when I was a teenager, I would have been one of the people checking their emails, FB etc every few minutes, and living life through a screen - as I have to make a real effort not to do that now, and I'm 66 for heaven's sake...
Apart from EVERYTHING listed so far, my big bugbear is children not being allowed/enabled/made to learn how to entertain themselves -- being happy in your own company is something that everyone should learn, but children now seem unable to just play without anyone else being involved, or electronic equipment, or 'playdates' (yuk, yuk, yuk) or visiting somewhere such as soft play. Then they grow into adults who don't know how to be alone and be happy, and so bounce from relationship to relationship, with no space in between...
Gosh, that feels better...

I'm quite old. I think some things are better now.

I love the internet,facebook etc.

Old people always hate how young people dress. That's always been the way.

The babying of school aged children. The need for parents to watch their nine and ten year olds walk through the classroom door when only a few years ago those same aged children and younger would have walked to school on their own.
The constant need for children to have endless endless snacks. The justification by parents that they get cross and upset because they have not been given something to eat. No- they get cross and upset because you won't give them what they want. Generations of children were raised without snacks and they were not fat like todays generation.

I read an article a while back and the gist of the piece was that invention and progress is not happening at the rate that it should be and civilization is in decline...

My grandfather saw world change from motorised cars to men landing on the moon.

My generation has gone backwards - supersonic flight is no longer and we are still so reliant on fossil fuels. We may have the microchip but we just end up reinventing the wheel - faster, smaller phones with better memory but still can only do what older models did ....

And don't start me on computer programmes that get old, are never fixed but just repackaged ....

Agree with many of these, especially NOISE.

And I had one just half an hour ago - bloody modern cars! It pings when I have 50 miles of fuel left, it also pings when the temperature goes below 4C.

I check my fuel gauge, I am aware that it is cold & there could be black ice (not today, obv) & I don't need reminding. I find it both distracting & irritating.

And the constant eating, not just children, but everyone seems to need to have a snack available at all times.

Don't have anything to add, but can I just say I love this! I feel I have found my spiritual home!!

Children being wrapped in bubble wrap.

Not walking long distances, not being allowed to go out. We treat them like they are precious little souls who can't manage in normal weather conditions and we are teaching them to be fearful of the world with the whole bogey man on every corner thing. Precious snowflake can't possibly climb trees because they might fall!

The obsession with bathing children every night. Even if they aren't dirty or smelly.

I love the internet and Facebook and I am quite guilty of some of the things which have been mentioned. I am also very guilty of not wanting to wait for things and expecting everything now. I find it hard to wait three days for a delivery because I want instant satisfaction. That is sad.

I am 33. So not old but feel it at times. I knew I was getting older when I walked past a group of girls going clubbing and I wanted to lend them my coat to keep them warm.

Ha ha! I'm 35 years young and agree with a lot of this. I was told I was cruel by someone as I get my 4 year old to play quietly on his own for an hour or so while I get my 1 year old to nap. He's a terrible day sleeper, wont sleep in his cot and has to be rocked off in the buggy. Wakes at the drop of a pin. I can't have my four year old in the same room as he's incapable of going for more than a minute without yelling or crashing into something. So he plays in the nice big safe room upstairs that's full of toys. Hardly cruel, but there you go. I don't let him snack all the day either, he wont eat his dinner!
On the other hand, we don't have leaded paint or fuel and Netflix is a boon when you're night feeding.

Re Christmas: my response to "Ah but Christmas is for children" (usually the monster present-buyers) is to say "No, Christmas is for Christians".
Meant to separate the spiritual from the greedy aspect, but usually met with a blank stare.

Perpetual engagements make no sense to me. How can you be engaged to be married, if you have no actual intention of getting married in the foreseeable future?
Also, announcements of forthcoming engagements? What is that about?

And I think a bit of healthy neglect does children no harm. They do not need to have every spare moment organised for them. It's amazing how much creativity a bit of boredom can bring out in children.
And any healthy teenager who is within reasonable walking distance from ,or on a public transport route to, their school should be responsible for getting themselves there and back every day.

I have noticed the snacks trend parents with pots and packets in little rucksacks the handing of A biscuit or carrot stick just because they moan a bit its not even the obesity thing its the constant feeding of children dont understand it

I miss living in a world which I didn't think might be going to hell in a handbasket next week, where Alaska wasn't melting, where umpty species of animals weren't about to be in zoos only, where there wasn't the ever-present threat of global pandemic, nuclear war and Yellowstone going up - to mention just a few of the possible problems. I miss the greenness of things as they were many moons ago - now everything just seems to be loads of (very signposted and marked) interconnected roads with a lot of rubbish lying around.

You'll have to forgive the gloom. I've just been reading James Lovelock.

YY to long engagements. I have a secret unfashionable theory that the man proposes for a quiet life but then has no intention of actually marrying her. It's very sad and you should be able to sue for breach of promise when the buggers don't cough up.

Yy Chalet - I grimace whenever someone says "we plan to get engaged next year". Um no, if you have decided to get married you are engaged, even if he hasn't hired a white horse and doves for a big proposal

For me it seems things can't be enjoyed anymore as its just too busy.

People are crammed into events,theme parks etc and considering there is a recession whenever you fancy a day out it is heaving wherever you go.

I never remember places being so full it spoils the day out years ago , but now it's queue after queue with kids running riot

Agree with lots of these.

You can def. get married on very little money, as we did, and so did all our friends....12 church wedding, reception at someone's home with all the aunties bringing a dish or something or other. Cake, cups of tea, very quick speeches, happy couple leave at about 5pm for low key honeymoon in the UK. Really lovely occasions with no 'favours' or whatever they are, and none of the attendant fuss.

People drinking and eating all the time...we never had a drink between meals or snacks either. 3 meals and a glass of water with each, and that was that.

12 o'clock that should be

Have just been involved in the decision to discontinue a long running much loved event because the increase in paper work and man power to run it is unbelievable . Also the much higher risk of people trying to sue us because little Johnny fell over a stick we had failed to remove from the ground has made us no longer wish to bother. Sad but I can see this happening to a lot of events in the future.

fanjo which part of some things are better and some things worse confused you?

In some ways the 70s childhood was miles better than today and other ways not. I was pointing out both instances.

Clearly the 'dim table' was vile. I wasn't trying to shock you. It was shocking.

Proms piss me off as dd is obsessed with hers next week.

Also math for maths, play date for going for tea, lol, lil man, bands for baby girls heads, Ofsted, celebs, tatoos, body piercings, (my kids have both) whinging parents unable to accept their child is a fucking pita and not high spirited, parents loudly parenting, people who mix up race with culture and religion and cry racism.

You can't be racist to a religion twat head, loom bands, the words random, hash tag, and people who say 'oh can we still say that?' If it's nasty then no you can't!, George Galloway and plastic surgery.

And people saying they are dehydrated!!! No you are just thirsty and actually can do without that water bottle for 10 fucking minutes.

I remember kids with SN Soduthen,they were hidden out of sight in the "remedial" class.
Sweets and chocolate being available whenever, not as a special thing. If we had a bar of cadburys, we shared it and it lasted a couple of nights.

And whatever happened to those lovely firm sweet Canary tomatoes you could buy?

You didn't say which was which sodu. That's what I meant by needing qualification.

Why does Christmas end on 25th? That used to be the start of the parties, not the start of a 10 day holiday. Why do people hold Christmas parties in November but take the decorations down on 26th?

Plus there was the link made with a good smack and not seeing kids with SN, like you can smack SN out of kids or its just a result of poor discipline. So I was definitely confused as to whether you thought that it was a good or bad thing. HTH.

cozietoesie - before you start getting depressed, may I just check that you know Lovelock has admitted to being "alarmist" about climate change, and that you know in the 70s they were panicking about an imminent Ice Age..? I used to work with someone who told me that London would be under water "in 5 years". He told me this 9 years ago, I think. Then of course he had children, because who wouldn't plan to raise kids in an underwater city?!