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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To expect my DCs (Yr 7&9) to walk 40 mins to school and home again.

399 replies

Lauresbadhairday · 10/06/2015 15:35

My DCs are at an independent school and therefore most of the children live some distance away and are dropped off and picked up from school by parents every day. We live a 40 min walk away and I think my DCs should be able to manage this to and from school. They are 12 & 14.

They moan daily about walking - "it's too far", "my bag's too heavy, "it's raining", "none of my friends walk" etc, etc.

Now by my own admission I have been too soft and have dropped them off/picked them up quite frequently however I really want this to stop and for them to walk. I am getting much tougher and have not given them a lift at all since half-term but the moaning continues.

So, AIBU in making them walk 40 mins to school and back? If the general consensus is that I am then I will suck it up and give them a lift but I really think at 12&14 they are perfectly capable of walking this distance daily.

OP posts:
KingJoffreyLikesJaffaCakes · 10/06/2015 15:38

My DS does.

Has since he was 10.

Jollyphonics · 10/06/2015 15:40

I think it's a long way to walk to be honest. Do you work and find it difficult to fit the commute in with your schedule, or do you want them to walk because it's good for them? Could you drop them part way? Is there a bus?

Talismania · 10/06/2015 15:41

YABU. 40 minutes isn't far for a one off but way too much daily.

TobikkoRoll · 10/06/2015 15:41

Mine walk 20 mins (fast pace) each way to secondary school, they still complain. To be fair, they each carry a heavy rucksack. I occasionally drive them,

Chunkymonkey79 · 10/06/2015 15:42

Yabu

Personally I think a 40 minute walk twice a day around school is a bit much.

20 minutes each way would be about right for me.

Chunkymonkey79 · 10/06/2015 15:43

In addition to my post, it must be hell in the winter walking all that way getting cold and wet!

MuddlingMackem · 10/06/2015 15:43

YANBU. My DS will have an approx 35 minute walk each way when he starts Y7 in September. Good exercise for them. Grin

Sabaidee · 10/06/2015 15:43

I think it is a good habit to get into. Admittedly, I am an adult. But have always walked an hour to work in the morning and find it the best way to wake up and wind down. Much better than sitting in a car or on a bus.

inthename · 10/06/2015 15:44

yanbu, but ds also at independent, walks as we are about 10 mins away and has had so much teasing and stupid comments because he walks its ridiculous, so bear in mind that the moaning may be fueled by peer pressure. No problem with them walking, though maybe give them a lift in bad weather.

HmmAnOxfordComma · 10/06/2015 15:44

No, it's not too far in reasonable weather UNLESS they do have a point about bags being heavy?

Ds is at an independent school and they use far more textbooks than in all the state schools locally. I wouldn't want him to be walking for 40 minutes each way with his very heavy bag (we live a lot nearer school)...

MuddlingMackem · 10/06/2015 15:44

Although he will be able to get the bus occasionally if the weather is lousy.

GooseyLoosey · 10/06/2015 15:44

40 mins is quite long - have you felt the weight of their bags?

What are you doing when you are not giving them a lift? If work makes it a total nightmare then you have to balance the hardship for them against the inconvenience for you.

If it is just you don't want to, then I think YABU

BrilliantDayForTheRace · 10/06/2015 15:45

40 minutes is not too far!
But if they don't want to walk they can always bike :)

jazzandh · 10/06/2015 15:45

Can they cycle or scoot? What time to they have to leave to get to school and what time do they get out of school, and what is the walk like?

HmmAnOxfordComma · 10/06/2015 15:45

Oh, ds's school has a minibus collection service from the train station (5 mins). It seems to be all girls who use the bus - the boys all walk.

kslatts · 10/06/2015 15:46

YANBU, we live about 40 mins walk for dd's school and they walk, they are 15 and 13. I drive past the school on my way to work and will sometimes give them a lift to school, however when I work from home they walk both ways.

Talismania - why do you think it's too far?

jazzandh · 10/06/2015 15:47

How far is it actually?

MrsLeighHalfpenny · 10/06/2015 15:47

I used to walk about 40 mins to school and home every day - up a big hill on the way home too Sad. And sometimes carrying school bag, gym bag and cookery basket.

If there's no alternative, it's certainly not going to do them any harm. If there is an alternative, how about taking them in the car or collecting them as a treat every so often - every Friday perhaps, so the weekend can start asap.

pigsinmud · 10/06/2015 15:47

My 2 older dc walk 40 mins twice a day for school. I had to walk 35 mins twice a day when I was at school. I think it's fine.

SilasGreenback · 10/06/2015 15:47

Could they cycle? With good panniers they can carry a lot of books.

School bag, plus games kit, plus and instrument (if they play one) is a bit much to carry 40 minutes walking.

ThroughThickAndThin01 · 10/06/2015 15:47

I think it's too far every day as well.

Cycling would make it easier.

ouryve · 10/06/2015 15:48

Would you walk that distance with heavy bags, either end of a long day, in all weathers?

It's a hell of a walk to do day in, day out. And I say that as someone who has always walked a lot.

BluebeardsSidekick · 10/06/2015 15:48

"I think it's a long way to walk to be honest." "a bit much"

A bit much? At 12 and 14?! My children were doing that amount of walking at three and five! The three year old did double that for some considerable time, dropping off the 5 year old with me, walking home and then doing the same trip in the afternoon to pick up again.

YANBU.

Magicalmrmistofeles · 10/06/2015 15:50

I think 40 mins in the rain is too far, I wouldn't want to. Otherwise as long as they have decent backpacks can't see the problem.

Is there no bus?

hellhasnofurylikeahungrywoman · 10/06/2015 15:50

40 mins walk is perfectly acceptable if they have well fitting rucksacks to carry any heavy school books.