To expect my DCs (Yr 7&9) to walk 40 mins to school and home again.

[Lauresbadhairday]

My DCs are at an independent school and therefore most of the children live some distance away and are dropped off and picked up from school by parents every day. We live a 40 min walk away and I think my DCs should be able to manage this to and from school. They are 12 & 14.

They moan daily about walking - "it's too far", "my bag's too heavy, "it's raining", "none of my friends walk" etc, etc.

Now by my own admission I have been too soft and have dropped them off/picked them up quite frequently however I really want this to stop and for them to walk. I am getting much tougher and have not given them a lift at all since half-term but the moaning continues.

So, AIBU in making them walk 40 mins to school and back? If the general consensus is that I am then I will suck it up and give them a lift but I really think at 12&14 they are perfectly capable of walking this distance daily.

I don't mean to be harsh here but if there are schools in a closer proximity to you and you chose against these for your dc then you should make arrangements for transport for them.
I bet it's no picnic in the park for them during the winter either.
If they were complaining about walking the odd time then yes they are being unreasonable, but I bet they are knackered sometimes.
Private schools can be a lot more hectic than state schools, have more going on and the dc get tired easier, sometimes.
can they not get a taxi/bus sometimes, or share lifts?
If their bags are heavy and/or they have extra equipment or instruments YABVU.

Good idea about cycling. I cycled to school, but if I'd walked it would have taken about 40 minutes I think. There's no way I would have walked. I would have got the bus (we didn't have a car so no option of a lift)

YANBU. They're old enough and it's good exercise.

I think it's too much, especially with a heavy rucksack and bad weather. I used to walk 25 mins to school and it was manageable (but I didn't live in windy, cold, rainy UK)

I'm not sure if it is relevant as to why you want them to if not. I mean, if you just want an extra hour and half in bed that's less fair than if you havent got time for other commitments because of the school run.

I used to walk about 30 minutes to and from secondary school, with bags, musical instruments, art folder, cookery basket etc. My mum was a SAHM with a car but would only drive us in the most dire circumstances!

Could they cycle? Then they could carry some of their heavy load in panniers or a bike basket.

YANBU. At the risk of sounding like one of the Four Yorkshiremen: In my last year at Primary School I walked alone both ways, admittedly without bags but I was 10/11, and it took about 35/40 minutes each way.

I complained at first but soon began to enjoy it. Make 'em walk.

Why don't you walk it yourself with their average day's kit on your back and see if it feels like a long way to you?

Honestly, I think walking 3 miles each way with 5 textbooks, 5 exercise books, pencil case, diary, thick reading book, massive games kit and a musical instrument is too much IF there's an alternative.

But 5 exercise books and a pencil case on a 1.5 mile dawdle is a different picture altogether.

Maybe they walk to school but you pick them up?

Bluebeard I would say that the distance these kids are walking is about 3 miles each way, at a guess. I think 12 miles per day for your 3 year old was a lot, I don't know many 3 year olds who would do that every day!

40 minutes walk is going to be something like 2-3 miles. It's an ideal distance for using a bicycle - particularly as it's not too far to walk as a back-up, but cycling will cut their travel time in half.

Cycle Streets is a good website for finding out where cycle paths are and planning routes.

Independent school can be pretty full-on. I obviously can't speak for all of them, but when I was young, there were days when I was there at 8:30 until 18:00, including a two-hour PE session. A 40-minute walk each end of that would be hard work.

Dear god no wonder we have an obesity crisis, we're raising a generation of lazy wimps! 40 minutes is a perfectly acceptable walk for a healthy young person, and so bloody what if it's raining?! Get a decent coat and they're not going to melt.

I'm astounded at the replies here, I genuinely am.

Not too far if safe to walk. Certained i did it for 5 years. At that age they enjoy it anyway. If raining dogs and cats maybe that day give lift if you can. X

My dc have always walked to school, well except ds1 high school as that was 4 miles away and he got free transport.
However, if their school is pretty close they aren't going to get so wet.
I wouldn't want to have to walk for 40 mins in rain or snow or sleet and then sit all day in wet clothes. Would you, OP?
So, I wouldn't expect my children to, just because they are younger than me.

If they carry a lot of books, games equipment etc, this is going to be bad for their backs. Given that they are likely to be doing PE and games in addition to a heavy curriculum workload and a fair amount of walking around the school, I think this is a bit much.

I'm surprised by how many people think this is a long way...shows how little exercise us normal these days.

I grew up somewhere remote with no public transport. We did not have a car. I walked to school, 45 mins, from an early age.

I survived to tell the tale!

Mine do that, year 7 and 10. They have never moaned. I think they quite enjoy it. I know a big group of them walk home together.

If the weathers really bad dh will give them a lift half way on his way to work.

It's a long way if it's raining tbh.
They would be soaked by the time they got to school.
I think it's totally ok to walk. But maybe walking there and getting a lift home?
Especially if they have had PE in the afternoon.
Would that be a suitable compromise?
My year 7 Ds walks both ways but it's only about 20/25 mins each way and I give him a life if the weather is foul.

Kelly1814 Welcome to Yorkshire

That is a long walk with heavy book bags after a long day at private school(school hours at private are usually longer than state, right?)

It also depends on the route, is it allon pavement or is it along busy roads (no pavement)

Is there really no school bus option? That is so very unusualfor private schools.

Too far! My MS carries all his books and the weight of it would give him dreadful back problems if he carried it every day! He chooses to do so as he is disorganised and we came to the conclusion he was better off carrying most of it than get detentions for forgetting the right books.

It also depends on the road. His route to school includes a good mile stretch on a very busy main road with no pavement or path or a very long detour to find a suitable pathway so is simply too dangerous.

Babyganoush: he's at private school & they do offer buses but their routes don't come past our house so by the time he gets to the nearest pickup point I could have driven him in!

YABU. It's too far with bags and kit etc. I wouldn't want to walk 40 mins to work every day and back home again too. Think I walked about 25 mins to secondary school. Maybe you could drop them half way or let them walk to school but pick them up on the way home.

It's not that it's too far, I mean I would happily walk 40 mins to work if I had to (didn't have to be somewhere else on the way back) but I don't take kilograms and kilograms of books and equipment to work with me, just a small handbag.

And I don't do two hours of games at work, either, so I need extra exercise.

Plus, I don't come home and do two hours of homework, either. The time spent walking is quite a lot of time out of their evening - what's left of it after the longer day at an independent school. But, like I said, they could be moaning about nothing if they don't carry much and actually just dawdling along on a pretty short walk rather than frogmarching 3-4 miles home.

80 minutes per day walking is a lot, not because it is too strenuous, but because the school day is long and homework plentiful. I would buy them bikes or scooters.