not to let dd go for a jog round local country park by herself in the evenings?

[CocktailQueen]

We live ten mins walk from a country park. You have to go along canal to get to it. DD is 11 and wants to go for a run by herself in the evenings along the canal, round country park then home.

AIBU not to let her?

If she had a phone, would that make it any different? She walks to school by herself but that seems different to me - more people around. Country park can be v quiet. Big deep lake too.

DH more inclined to let her go.

Can't think what I'm worried about - abduction? falling into lake? loose dogs in country park (often a problem)? It just feels wrong.

and here

I have a degree in criminology, I'm very well aware of the. Arguement of the fear of crime being more of a problem than crime itself due to media saturation.

And while as an adult I may be prepared to weigh those arguments up and take a chance I'm not prepared to take such a risk with dd.

The OP States there is a nearer, safer sounding park or the streets to jog round. I would offer that as a compromise.

And I can find plenty more media reports of attacks. I can think of three off the top of my head in my home town in the last few months.

Remember these days it's only the murders or exceptionally violent attacks which make the national news. There's plenty of other attacks which don't make the national news. Heck, if the woman fights the bloke off it barely gets a mentions in the local news!

no way!!!!!!!
she's way too young.

Nope, I wouldn't.

We live in a lovely peaceful area, just by a beautiful park. In fact, I'm just back from my run there. There was an early evening boot camp going on, lots of dog walkers, lots of runners, boating lake, bowling green. Idyllic, really.

A few weeks ago, a young boy of nine was grabbed by a stranger hiding in the bushes, in that lovely park, at 9.00 o'clock in the morning. He got away, but no-one has been caught yet.

I just wouldn't take the risk.

I've been flashed at and followed in s park (not by the same person) as s teenager. And my friend who is a runner has been bitten by dogs off leads a couple of times.

Can't your DD run round the streets if she has to run unaccompanied?

I would be cagey about it myself. I'm a lone runner and adjust my routes to different conditions. I don't get chance to head out early evenings, but at night I restrict my routes to better lit areas where more help is potentially avaliable from nearby houses. I suspect that places like the woods are safer due to lack of people making it a daft place to lay in wait for a victim, but it's the primal fear of what is unseen in the dark. Statistically trip hazards are most risk.

At 11, your strength for self defence would be poor. I'm petite and about the same size as many y7s, but I have more power than that age group. I was once assaulted in my sleep at a party, and my reaction on waking was to kick him hard in the face. I appreciate that I can't rely on that in a different context, but it does give me more confidence, and confidence is important for personal safety.

There are apps that track by GPS to another phone. Making routes known in advance. Wearing bright and distinctive clothing and preventing long hair from being grabable are techniques for improving personal safety. Also attack alarms.

Nope, never not in a million years. I would not do that as a 33 year old.

ivykaty you asked for an example of a woman being attacked in a country park in the last year: www.birminghammail.co.uk/news/sheldon-country-park-woman-dragged-8146975

ivykaty Another report where police looked for links of 3 attacks: Kent Police say attacks on women in Riverside Country Park, Motney Hill Road and Woodlands Road in Gillingham could be linked www.kentonline.co.uk/medway/news/police-link-attacks-on-women-25802/

Woman assaulted in Upton Country Park: www.northants.police.uk/#!/News/25256

Staffordshire Police appealing for information after woman attacked by dog at Apedale Country Park www.stokesentinel.co.uk/Staffordshire-Police-appealing-information-woman/story-24518868-detail/story.html#ixzz3bvx9Wcqp

DO YOU WANT MORE?

ivykaty Another one here 14 months ago: Community reeling after mum murdered while out walking her dog www.manchestereveningnews.co.uk/news/local-news/community-reeling-after-mum-murdered-1059012

Now, do you accept that these random assaults and murders DO happen.

Are you prepared to allow any of your children out alone without good risk assessment skills and emergency procedures/back-up?

Well there's the Alice Gross murder •ivykaty•, for a canal/towpath incident.

The point is even if statistically the risks are infinitesimally small, they are to me and I suspect to many parents still too high.

I also think that a pre-teen girl is intrinsically more vulnerable than a grown woman, so I wouldn't let an 11yo run places just because I'd run there.

I don't think I'd do that at my age, so I wouldn't let my dd do it.

YANBU, but I used to walk my dog in the park before and after school from that age.

I was attacked by a group of male youths when I was 17. I wouldn't let her.

No. wouldn't do it. And I am very free with my kids.

I run on my own but wouldn't run somewhere quiet on my own in the evenings. In fact the risk of encountering an axe-wielding maniac is one of the reasons I run in the early mornings before work - I imagine that the they'll be still in bed then, possibly tired from a late night of axe-wielding.

I can't believe any parent would in all seriousness even ask this question.

• Arguement of the fear of crime being more of a problem than crime itself due to media saturation

we dont have enough reports of crime, someone has said we couldnt build enough prisons in uk to house all the peadophiles out there and public will be shocked when reports come out.

so no.

I live niace area and a lovely park near by . But I never let you 14 year old son walk the dog in evening.
Why
because there was aways kids smoking drinking and doing drugs.

YANBU It would be no, from me too. But I am, by nature, risk averse. I think, follow your instinct.

You have found five attacks out ofa population of thirty five million......now go and look at how many people died in cars last year and will that stop people getting in a car tomorrow morning?

DS1 is 9 and loves running, so I began running with him and we go at leafs twice a week together. It's good for us, and I'm happier running with him than I would be allowing him to go alone.

YANBU.It is an absolute no brainer!I would go with her on a bike if necessary

Some posters seem to think I'm asking about dd going out by herself in the dark - I'm not! I was talking about early summer evenings when it's light.

Sad widow - thank you for your helpful and insightful post.

Thanks again, all.

And I'm perfectly happy going to the park myself for a walk in the evenings ... I feel safe. But then I'm an adult and more aware than dd.