I'm wondering perhaps if he feels disconnected from the baby? That the reason he doesn't want you to know either is because you knowing something he doesn't is yet another thing about the baby that he doesn't know/can't experience that you can?
Is it a weird sort of jealousy that you have all the control when it comes to the baby making side of things? You grow, you birth, you feed etc etc. Or than men aren't as celebrated as the woman having the child?
Or is it, as you queried earlier, that he realises he has no say and that you can, and probably will, do what you want.
You said he had never experienced mental health issues until you miscarried and had the depressive episode. You said he found that "vvv hard", but then you also said when you tried to explain your position "he got frustrated and said I was making him feel guilty 'just like with the miscarriage'". It reads to me like he thinks you are trying to emotionally manipulate him, and that he doesn't think you're emotionally sound at the moment. That alone should help him see that you're "different" from the last pregnancy and need help this time.
My sister had bad PND following the birth of her first born, so much so that there were steps in place to monitor her with the second baby. We were all on high alert making sure we were careful to spot the signs and not upset her (even when she was being irrational). I think your husband needs to speak to someone to understand the risks here.
Your prior depressive episode surrounding a pregnancy is cause for concern. It shouldn’t mean that you get to do or say whatever you want, but you know your body and you feel this will help. Perhaps instead you could concede that you need to talk to someone and that you think he should to because of your feelings surrounding the miscarriage and this pregnancy. And yes, sure, you’re hormonal, but that doesn’t mean you aren’t really feeling these feelings or that you’re really not at risk here.