Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to feel annoyed at people being so insensitive and presumptious!

136 replies

Allstoppedup · 22/05/2015 16:15

So I found out this morning that I am having another little boy. I already have a 17 month old DS who is gorgeous, funny, clever and generally awesome in my PFB opinion

Since this morning I have already had two people comment to say how "disappointed" I must be and how it's a "such a shame" because he's not a girl.

I didn't and still don't give a big hairy gonad what sex child I was having and am absolutely thrilled to be having another lovely boy.

I am still very pleased but have been honestly taken back by both of these people (one a neighbour and one a friend) and how negative they are.

My response so far was to smile and say something along the lines of why would I be disappointed, I make fantastic boys!

Dont know why I've posted really as I know it's been done to death but I just felt it really made me feel crappy when I previously felt great and wanted to rant!

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 22/05/2015 16:17

Meh! Ignore them.

And I say that as a Mother of 3 boys.

Congratulations btw Thanks

TheOriginalWinkly · 22/05/2015 16:17

People are fucking idiots. Death stare them until they go away and be fucking idiots in someone else's air space. Congratulations on DS2 :)

EElisavetaOfBelsornia · 22/05/2015 16:18

How fucking rude. And ridiculous! Congratulations on your little boy, ignore the dickheads.

PunkrockerGirl · 22/05/2015 16:20

YANBU. Ignore them.
(Mum of 2 gorgeous adult boys).

TedAndLola · 22/05/2015 16:22

Unlike many on here, I think personal gender disappointment (should be called sex disappointment) is valid and not something to be ashamed of, but telling someone ELSE you are disappointed about the sex of their baby is awful and totally unreasonable. Congratulations on your second little boy.

Charlotte3333 · 22/05/2015 16:24

Oh god I had loads of that when I was pregnant with DS2, people sometimes are full of mistaken belief that your life is only complete once you have one of each brand of child. I have two boys and never for a second wished either away. Boys are splendid little creatures, two of them has made our family twice as hilarious. Congratulations Flowers.

0x530x610x750x630x79 · 22/05/2015 16:25

my neighbour had someone say "are you going to stop now you have a boy?" after having 2 girls before.
People are fuckwits

BettyCatKitten · 22/05/2015 17:26

Yanbu, rude and insensitive. When people asked me what I was hoping for when I was pg, I used to reply 'a baby'Grin

Original poster
Allstoppedup · 22/05/2015 17:36

Betty Grin

We found out for practical reasons! I wanted to know if I needed to keep hold of the baby boy clothes mountain in the loft! Grin

It's just daft though, granted gender disappointment can and does happen but why assume everyone wants 'one of each'!

OP posts:
Holden10 · 22/05/2015 17:36

'A big hairy gonad' has just had me crying with laughter

Congrats on ds2 and yadnbu!!

Writerwannabe83 · 22/05/2015 17:46

I had a dad tell me the other day, as he was holding his new DS, how he "didn't want a boy but he's here now I guess" and I was stunned. I had no idea how to respond.

I was shocked that some people really do feel disappointed in what sex their baby and openly talk about it. I felt quite sad for the baby and I hope he never hears his dad say such a thing in the future Sad

Congratulations on your pregnancy Flowers

yellowdinosauragain · 22/05/2015 17:53

Another mum of 2 boys here who got this. Plus 'when are you trying for a girl?'

Ignore and pity them. And massive congratulations on your lovely boys!

Alyx80 · 22/05/2015 17:56

I have 4 boys - the comments haven't got better!

freshlysharpenedpencils · 22/05/2015 17:58

I'm due to have second boy soon. I got a lot of "oh you'll have to try again next time for a girl" PISSED ME OFF majorly - but they are just trying to think of something to say... And I don't think they mean any harm. Good luck with your gorgeous boys - boys are the best :-)

ARightOldPickle · 22/05/2015 17:58

I had a neighbour peer in the pram at DD3 and say never mind dear, they're all blessings aren't they? Wtf? People can be so rude and thoughtless at times - ignore them.

And congratulations!

PatsyNoPasta · 22/05/2015 17:59

People are twats. With twatty opinions. Ignore. Boys are lovely. Mine drop in and see me all the time. My daughters only ring me when they want cash Grin YANBU.

SuffragetteCity · 22/05/2015 18:00

Yep, 2 boys here, and our family is complete! Grin Yanbu, I still get asked frequently if we want to "try for a girl" and it gets tiresome.

Minisoksmakehardwork · 22/05/2015 18:00

Yanbu. I was deemed 'lucky' to have one of each. Then we had twins. Also one of each.

It was so funny watching people gape when they commented 'oh how lovely, your family is complete' on seeing baby twin girl and boy, and we replied 'yes, their big brother and sister are thrilled too'.

Now the twins are older, and look nothing like each other, we are left well alone. Unless we happen to be out en masse as a family.

Noteventhebestdrummer · 22/05/2015 18:01

I have 5 boys. I used to tell rude people that if I'd had girls I'd have given them away.

Weathergames · 22/05/2015 18:03

When I had DDS after DS1 loads of comments about how I would stop now I had a "pigeon pair" Hmm

I think DS2 is glad I didn't Smile

Anniegetyourgun · 22/05/2015 18:03

Two boys! Gorgeous! I liked boys so much I had four.

Weathergames · 22/05/2015 18:03

DD sorry

donemekmelarf · 22/05/2015 18:06

Congratulations! You're having a beautiful baby boy! Flowers

rembrandtsrockchick · 22/05/2015 18:15

Congratulations!

I had two boys...loved every minute of it.

ItsADinosaur · 22/05/2015 18:15

I have two boys too and know exactly what you're saying. It's bloody rude, my boys are gorgeous.