Who is unreasonable? what does MN think of this?

[ollieplimsoles]

this story just broke on social media, (hope you can all see it)

www.facebook.com/donna.m.beegle/posts/816056981803855

That is the mothers account of what happened, very mixed responses from the commenters, what does everyone think?

Here is a news report of it:
7online.com/news/parents-plan-legal-action-after-daughter-with-autism-kicked-off-flight/713012/

I assumed when she said scratching- that meant her dd scratches herself, as my friends son does that during a meltdown. He scratches his face and head badly.

Yes, but the crew member may not have known that, or that it was likely.

If an airline is serving food there is usually a huge drop down menu when you book.

You may pay for seating, but usually there are options for food intolerances, dietary requirements , kids meals ...

Unscheduled stops cost ££££ or $$$$ and wouldn't be taken on a whim.

Although it would cost the airline, they aren't going to second guess the pilot in case it all goes tits up and they are reported as having denied the stop. So his prejudice or that of the crew could be the main point here.

Yes the mother should have ordered the meal but it sounds like the airline didn't want them to have it because of where they were sat not because of payment or lack of planning.

The parents may have thought that they could get her to eat in the airport but she wouldn't. Sometimes it doesn't matter how well you plan, things go wrong.

I agree with pp that if she'd wanted the meal for someone who was diabetic they wouldn't have refused. Considering the ignorance shown by professionals in the 'field' I have no doubt that there is some discrimination based on ignorance going on here. At least in part.

Mum's body language is quite interesting here.

Thats not a "little" girl in the photo's she looks like a teenager, who could more than hurt someone if she chose to :(

Some interesting thoughts elsewhere. Captain may have been worried about potential liability of having to restrain an autistic teenage girl if she did (as the crew member may have feared) become violent towards other passengers. Divert and eject avoided that.

The captain said threats were made and they 'demanded hot food or else she'll scratch'.

Another passenger said she said her daughter was going to have 'a breakdown' and she 'was known to harm herself and others when she did'.

I don't know how anybody could expect to say that to a responsible cabin crew and expect the flight to continue. She is a teenage girl on an aeroplane. If she had broken down she would have been physically restrained, put into restraints and possibly removed with the use of fire arms. Landing the plane and removing her before that happened was sensible as it would have been far preferable to the alternative.

The Facebook page is interesting too. It's not a personal one. Seems mum travels all over the USA and has to get publicity/traffic where she can.............

Sounds like the removal from the plane was more to do with the attitude of the mother than an autistic child.

I completely blame the mother, she should have done more to guarantee her daughter would have what she needs.
The pilots responsibility is keeping every passenger safe and if he was told a 15 year old could be about to have a violent outburst which they can't control he needs to do everything he can to make sure it doesn't happen, which in this case means landing the plane and having the passenger removed.

Disappointed I had a look at her page and its interesting, she certainly travels around a lot and sounds like her daughter does too. Doesn't mention that she has asked for a hot meal from first class whilst in economy before and what the outcome was, just that her daughter 'never had a problem'

Well it's hard to judge from one side of the story. And a lot depends on the precise language used and tone of what was being said.

OTOH the flight attendants could have just made an exception for this disabled girl a lot earlier on in the process and given her the hot food before it got to threats of violence and landing the plane etc. I get that you can't change the rules for everyone, but in the case of disability it seems like it would have been easy to just make the adjustment in this case.

OTOH, I don't know why the mum didn't think about this earlier and feed her before the flight, or make special arrangements in advance.

Does dad not have any responsibility, then?

Even the passengers are commenting on the impending lawsuit while they are leaving the plane!

She certainly isn't a 'little girl' and could have hurt someone if she had a meltdown as her mother stated. It's entirely the parents responsibility for sorting out her food beforehand. The mothers Facebook page indicates she's some sort of publicity seeker.

... Or they could have just given her the sodding meal. The airline stated it was because they didn't serve hot food in economy class, not that she hadn't paid. Which leads me to believe she could not have ordered it anyway.

If the girl was an imminent threat, then yes land the plane but for the potential to be a threat, no. Otherwise an awful lot of autistic children and adults are effectively banned from flying due to a disability.

I suspect the mother was trying to get the flight staff to understand that her request for hot food want an idle want but a necessity.

The pilot may also have seen this as a medical emergency. Anyone having a meltdown on a plane is a potential problem for everyone and they did what they had to to avoid such an outcome.

It's not like a plane can just stop at the next available layby. They need to find the nearest airport, do a flight plan, get permission etc. It all takes time and they couldn't wait until the threatened meltdown happened.

Seems like there's plenty of blame to go around, but I can't imagine boarding a plane with a child having food issues without having carefully considered the food situation.

Everyone knows (or should know) that airlines are unpredictable when it comes to food & drink - turbulence can interrupt a service, the oven can malfunction, they run out of food, there are scores of things that can and do go wrong.

As a mum of sn children I know how important it is to prepare for trips, if I was her I would have made arrangements for food weeks before the flight as to not cause my dd distress if there was not suitable food on board.

Though I don't agree with landing a plane to remove a person who at the time was no risk to anyone as she had got her food and was happily eating and watching a film.

I'm a bit sceptical to be honest. I've been in a situation where DS had to be admitted to hospital, but he had to have his own room because

1. He sometimes bolts and that wouldn't be safe

1. He can't stand the sound of crying. Although he hasn't been aggressive for 3 years, I couldn't really risk that when there would be a lot of crying poorly children on the ward, at the end of the day they'd be hurting him, and in that much pain I don't know how I would react.

The first time he was admitted there was a nurse trained in his condition who got him the room. He was discharged against the doctors orders (without my knowledge, I thought he would be fine) so was admitted again at which time there was a different nurse who refused him a room.

So I took him home and his paediatrician went ballistic at the nurses by all accounts, and called home once every 6 hours as if he was doing hospital rounds to advise me. Luckily I'm pretty clued up and could deal with things at home, but if I wasn't, things could go very wrong very fast.

I didn't make an official complaint or 'sue' but it was because it was the NHS and we are lucky to have them. Even if this particular illness was caused by their mistakes.

That said...

I wouldn't knowingly put my child in a situation where he could get that distressed that he would even be tempted to harm others, and if that means taking him home and putting myself out, I will. I know we are supposed to be all inclusive, but sometimes being inclusive means not putting a person with disabilities in a situation which could harm them.

On the flip side...

They could have just got her the bloody hot meal really, there didn't need to be a long discussion in which the mother had to resort to telling them the worst case scenario.

I think there's fault on both sides, but going massively public isn't doing her any favours.

Mother was Nightmare passenger. Airline not unreasonable to offload although they are in general a shit airline I can say from previous experience.

Whatever the facts are, it seems hard to work out, different outlets are reporting differently.

But comments from readers I'm finding disgusting and ignorant.

Babble for example calling it "self-entitled" saying that if the SN child got a hot meal and no one else did, they'd all sue. FFS

I suspect the mother was trying to get the flight staff to understand that her request for hot food want an idle want but a necessity.

It would have been the right thing for the airline to do to just give this woman the hot lunch, yes. But it's kind of silly to rely upon the goodwill of others when it comes to the wellbeing of your child. Everyone knows that airlines can be efficious at the best of times, and this could present a real headache for the cabin crew as others become alive to the possibility of a first class lunch in coach.

Does dad not have any responsibility then?

Good point. He's pretty invisible in this whole account...