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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to not understand why men take half an hour to have a poo?

75 replies

molyholy · 19/04/2015 20:17

Why!!!! My dad used to do it. My husband does it. I just want to get in when I need a poo, do it and get out. Men seem to view it as a hobby. Have a read, look at their phone etc. Basically wallowing in the smell of thier own shit. You either need a poo, or you don't! Why why why??????

OP posts:
EatShitDerek · 19/04/2015 20:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

thetroubleis · 19/04/2015 20:20

It's called an I-poo.

catgirl1976 · 19/04/2015 20:20

I have no idea, but I recently found out why DH takes so very fucking long to have a shower.

loa321 · 19/04/2015 20:21

Are you sure they aren't wanking? Thats what I assume my DH is doing especially when he takes his phone

Smoorikins · 19/04/2015 20:21

Maybe it's to get some time away from others in the household?

bobajob · 19/04/2015 20:21

DP does this too, a good 15-20 minutes. I think it's too avoid looking about the children tbh.

catgirl1976 · 19/04/2015 20:22

That was the shower mystery solved loa

bigTillyMint · 19/04/2015 20:22

it's called an ipoo so true in our house!

Are you sure he's just having a poo? Wink

thewavesofthesea · 19/04/2015 20:23

My husband is the same. Takes his phone for an iPoo. My 5 year old son now does similar and also takes ages. My youngest son has better things to do with his time however thank goodness.

McButtonwillow · 19/04/2015 20:23

Yanbu it drives me mad! Especially when dh decides to go just before we need to use the bathroom or the dc need to brush their teeth before bed- it gives me the rage- just hurry up and crap can't you!!!!!!

gaggiagirl · 19/04/2015 20:23

Yup, having a wank.

RusticBlush · 19/04/2015 20:25

My Dh is in and out in a flash - its me who sits for ages in this house Blush

AuntieStella · 19/04/2015 20:25

My first thought was 'escaping the DC'

Having a wank is shower, not loo, isn't it?

Original poster
molyholy · 19/04/2015 20:26

Oh yes. Maybe a wank, but it definitely stinks of shit when he comes out. A 'shitwank' if you will Grin

OP posts:
PrettyPenguin · 19/04/2015 20:27

I can sometimes be in the loo for almost an hour...but I have IBD so I have a good excuse! It's certainly not out of choice though!!

TRexingInAsda · 19/04/2015 20:28

Haha, my BIL allegedly has a half hour to an hour poo every time he gets fed up of the kids! Dh takes a long time too, and he's not wanking, he has a game (or 2) on his PS3. But even when he doesn't take that in, he still takes 20 minutes.

ahbollocks · 19/04/2015 20:29

Pretty sure my ex used to go for a wank. He even used to do it in restaurants.
Dh is in and out thank god!

ProudAS · 19/04/2015 20:29

Never timed DH but it's pretty obvious he's taking a while if I'm desperate to go. He is generally considerate enough to give me the chance of going first.

wwbuffydo · 19/04/2015 20:30

Oooh it brings the fury out with me. Mine doesn't even shut the door. I have woken up, fed, changed my 2 month old ds and gone back to sleep in the time it takes for him to have a crap. I don't know why it infuriates me but it does. And he craps all the time!!

bobajob · 19/04/2015 20:30

DP takes a book with him (not a sexy one) so pretty sure it's just to get 20 minutes break Hmm

Original poster
molyholy · 19/04/2015 20:33

I'm no shit nazi, but can't understand why you would want to wallow in the smell.

OP posts:
chickenfuckingpox · 19/04/2015 20:33

i take forever in this house i have a shy bowel if anyone knocks walks past the door it clenches up and i have to wait forever to relax again

my ex took hours in the loo i was glad when i got a house with two loos!

flamingtoaster · 19/04/2015 20:39

I wouldn't worry as long as you don't find any modified toothbrushes in there .....

Gruntfuttock · 19/04/2015 20:40

OP, you're wrong to say 'men' as though all men do this. My father didn't do it, nor does my husband. I don't understand why anyone would have books in the loo. Anywhere but there is a more pleasant place to read, surely.

lithewire · 19/04/2015 20:42

Mine does this too and he has even asked me before how I manage to 'go' so quickly Hmm