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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To say something about this choice of baby name

550 replies

horrifiednamechanger · 10/04/2015 20:33

DB and SIL are expecting their first baby. The baby is long awaited and I'm delighted for them obviously.

But, SIL they have decided to call the baby Charmaine (yes, spelt like that) and to make matters worse SIL seems to pronounce it almost 'char' rather than the kind of French style 'shar'. It almost sounds like she is ordering a take away.

Anyway upon hearing this news I had to bite my tongue so hard it practically bled. I don't think I did a very good job of hiding my horror surprise.

DB and myself have rather naice upbringing and our DM was a huge bit of a snob, not quite Hyacinth Bucket but not far off. I am fully prepared to accept I have inherited DM's views and IBU.... but I am also sure this would not be DB first or last choice of name, but he is known to 'go with the flow' and 'not cause waves' because SIL can be quite strong willed.

IABU to hate the name and WIBU to say something?

OP posts:
KurriKurri · 10/04/2015 23:06

Are you quite mad OP ??? Are you Katie Hopkins?

I have no idea what you are on about. Charmaine has been around for ages as a name, - There were girls at my school called Charmaine (I am 55 and went to a girls boarding school)

How utterly mean of you, when your SIL has been long awaiting this baby to be bitching and getting into huddles with relatives to be nasty about her choice of name. Whatever makes you think it is any of your business what she calls her baby?

The again this is probably a joke thread and I'm getting outraged over nothing. I hope it is - would hate to think there were people who could be that horrible.

squoosh · 10/04/2015 23:07

I'm so useless at spotting wind up merchants (because MN is full of so many genuine 'characters'). I just see the good in everyone. Ahem.

KeturahLee · 10/04/2015 23:07

never, ok so a child a friend has told you about rather than one you've actually met...

Loletta · 10/04/2015 23:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

squoosh · 10/04/2015 23:08

neverletgojack a friend of mine has a little boy called Roy! Not my taste at all but he carries it off well! Grin

MaryBerrysLostCherry · 10/04/2015 23:10

You need to file this under stuff that's none of your bees wax and butt out. You are coming across as a snob with way too much time on your hands. It's their baby. It's much wanted and waited for and that makes it much luckier than a lot of folk no matter what they name it.

Loletta · 10/04/2015 23:11

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MaryBerrysLostCherry · 10/04/2015 23:11

I know a baby Frank. Lush and squishy.

ShotgunNotDoingThePans · 10/04/2015 23:12

An aside here: Kraggle, please say your nan is in her 70s abd not born in the 70s!?
< boggles >

neverletgojack · 10/04/2015 23:12

Aw Roy & Frank. I love names like that:)
Like what out grandparents or dads would be called, it just makes me smile.

goldopals · 10/04/2015 23:13

My Auntie has that name...

Pyjamaschocolateandwine · 10/04/2015 23:15

God I hope Charmaine gets a great degree and a top job. Grin

squoosh · 10/04/2015 23:15

If the OP is a real interfering busybody person the only opinion she should volunteer is that the name should be pronounced shar.

After that zip it.

itsnotmeitsyou1 · 10/04/2015 23:15

squoosh, its only going to go around in circles. Maybe Charmaine will become popular again, who knows. Many currently believe it's a bit a of a 'yuck' name, but of course it's ultimately the parents decision. However, people (including aunts) are allowed to gave opinions on names. It does not always make them snobby. I genuinely don't get why baby names are some sort of taboo, where any judgement or ill opinion is very frowned upon. I wouldn't tell a stranger or someone I wasn't close to that I thought their choice was horrible, but like I said before, I would talk to a sibling about it, and them to me. I wouldn't expect to be disowned or for them to 'lose all respect' for me because I don't like a name.

usualsuspect333 · 10/04/2015 23:16

Why would you admit you looked down on people?

usualsuspect333 · 10/04/2015 23:18

I'd tell my siblings to keep their nose out.

If they were crying over my choice of name I'd recommend they had some therapy.

Lucked · 10/04/2015 23:19

OP what is the other spelling? Your post implies they have picked a crazy spelling.

I know one in her thirties, named after her mother. I have never thought it as a great name but am a bit stunned at the roasting it's getting on here. The one I went to school with never got chow mein but I suppose we said shar

Yabvu. This is a longed for baby don't you go ruining the experience with your snobbery and do a better job of hiding your feelings too, your a grown-up!!

HairyMcMary · 10/04/2015 23:20

I bet your DB and SIL have sussed yours and your DH's massive snobbery and are winding you up. Don't let them make a mockery of you, look them in the eye and say 'charmant!' and ask if you can be godmother.

squoosh · 10/04/2015 23:21

I'd only give my opinion on a niece/nephew's name if the feedback was positive. I'd only make disapproving noises if I thought it was a name that would genuinely hold the child back, Adolf for example.

I just don't get the impression that the OP (if she's genuine) will give her feedback in a measured way. She's been sobbing all afternoon (apparently) and is now planning to ambush her brother when he's alone to harangue him into changing his mind.

Nothing good will come of that. That's kerazy territory.

NadiaWadia · 10/04/2015 23:24

What's wrong with it? I think you are over involved here, OP. Not one of my favourite names, but I can think of many names worse than that. Though it would be better pronounced properly with a 'sh' sound at the start.

MagicMojito · 10/04/2015 23:24

This thread is clearly a piss take but I'm Shock at some of the snooty, up-your-own-bum, snobby replies its had.

SistersofPercy · 10/04/2015 23:27

Wow, how glad am i that I'm not your sil. Good luck with your intervention, i do hope they tell you to fuck off to the far side of fuck listen to reason.

bonkersLFDT20 · 10/04/2015 23:27

I know two Charmaine's, one about my age (mid 40s) the other quite a bit older, I've never thought anything of it. They are both successfully living their lives and I've never heard anyone mock their names.

I live in Essex if that makes any difference.

Smooshface · 10/04/2015 23:28

I would not expect people to give their opinion about my actual name unless prompted, and would find it slightly rude if they said i had a chavvy name, so why would that be different for babies itsnotmeitsyou1 ?

a lot of people i'm replying to tonight have 1! I don't think I'd want an enforced number in my name, I'd think of something new! SEE I'M JUDGING YOUR NAME, HOW DO YOU LIKE THEM APPLES!

I haven't even had a wine yet, sorry

FightingFires · 10/04/2015 23:29

DP says he taught a lovely Charmaine last year. HTH.