Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

DP has gone and ruined our wedding planning with his petty strops

133 replies

Thailandthailand · 03/04/2015 21:57

So, today was to be the day when we began our wedding planning. Now, DP has made no secret of the fact that this is nothing special to him as he's "been there and done that" but this is a HUGE deal to me, it means so much to me.

So tonight we had a meeting with a lovely venue, everything is PERFECT - cost, venue, arrangements - EVERYTHING.

I came back elated. DP too was supposedly over the moon. yet he began his evening of arsyness over Springwatch. He points out that Springwatch is being filmed locally and I ask "oh? how do you know?" this results in a load of "how do I know??? how do I know??? oh lets see, how do I know exactly??? hmmmmm how do I KNOW?????" Hmm. so he basically makes this into something it didn't need to be.

Later in the night we settle down with a bottle of red - something I'd been looking forward to all week to celebrate our wedding planning beginnings and he refuses to hug me saying he;s annoyed that I've picked my feet Hmm I say "what??" and he points out that I have picked a nail off my foot. I say "oh yes, I', going to throw it away in a minute" and he replies "no you wont" and goes and throws it away himself before snapping "Goodnight" at 9pm and buggering off to bed.

I'm livid. This was supposed to be a celebration of the beginnings of our wedding planning and he's manufactured an argument out of nothing and I'm sat here, alone as usual with a glass of red and the fucking internet. AIBU to wonder why the fuck I bother?

OP posts:
MargotLovedTom · 04/04/2015 00:23

Where did he suggest splitting up? Confused

MargotLovedTom · 04/04/2015 00:24

That was to OP not PancakeFlipper.

Justmuddlingalong · 04/04/2015 00:30

The OP's DP has suggested they split up. It's on the other thread she has running. Here it is.

MargotLovedTom · 04/04/2015 00:34

Ok thanks.

ThumbWitchesAbroad · 04/04/2015 01:05

Dump and run!

spamm · 04/04/2015 02:21

Please read this back and think about what you have said. This is either a piss take, or you are seriously blind to the fact that he is not as serious about you as you are about him. What would you say to a friend who told you this story?

Only1scoop · 04/04/2015 02:43

Blimey Op busy first night on MN for you with your one stop shop posts.

Chew on a toe nail and mull it over.

yearofthegoat · 04/04/2015 03:36

You don't sound like you like him, you just like the idea of planning a wedding. And who sits down to a glass of wine with bits of toe nail sitting there? Yuk. I would be grossed out too. He does sound pretty awful too though, making such a fuss over Springwatch.

FeijoaSundae · 04/04/2015 05:10

Ah, he doesn't want to get married....?

And I don't understand why you do, to him, either?

Who gets married to someone they've caught going onto dating sites? Confused

Eggrique · 04/04/2015 05:30

I missed springwatch Sad

MythicalKings · 04/04/2015 05:32

A wedding is for one day, a marriage (if you get it right) is for life. I think you need to think less about the wedding and a lot more about what marriage to this arse will be like.

MarshmallowFluff · 04/04/2015 05:42

I think I love Kurri a little bit.....

Smile
mildlyacquiescent · 04/04/2015 05:45

Muriel becomes Maariel when she moves to the big smoke of Seedney (in defence of *only1scoop!).

redskirt · 04/04/2015 05:53

He was being horrible to you.

Hissy · 04/04/2015 07:50

Hook up sites = immediate BIN

Being an arse and saying ANYTHING other than "bloody well done" about your job = BIN

Hmm - he's been married before? and isn't now... Quelle surprise..

Don't marry this prick, he will make you more miserable than you could ever possibly imagine. He'll utterly crush you and your self esteem.

Eggrique · 04/04/2015 10:18

I've got to agree with Hissy.

Unfortunately OP while you're excited about qualifying in a new career and finding a perfect wedding venue, your P doesn't share either your interest or your joy.

Look beyond those two major life events and it doesn't sound like you're excited about being with him or about spending the rest of your married life together.

Please remember a wedding is just one day, a marriage is a lot longer Confused

MadgeFinn · 04/04/2015 11:48

It doesn't look too good I'm afraid, but really I don't think men get as excited about wedding plans as we do. He sounds nasty though.

fatlazymummy · 04/04/2015 12:29

I feel like this thread is a pisstake.
On the chance it's genuine, OP, I don't think this guy really wants to marry you. He probably just pretended he did to keep you sweet.
The toenail thing though - no, just no. In future, Do that sort of thing in private, a lot of people don't like it.

silveroldie2 · 04/04/2015 13:15

Looks like you're right fatlazymymmy www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/2347436-From-wedding-planning-to-splitting-up

ImperialBlether · 04/04/2015 13:28

Ok well when I read what his response to your Springwatch question, I thought he was insane. Either that or he would drive me insane.

I just can't stop thinking of you talking about an expensive, sophisticated wedding with toenails lying all around you. Can't you see how incongruous that is?

EchoOfADistantTide · 04/04/2015 13:29

I can't decided whether you are very badly matched, or incredibly well suited, but I wish you luck whichever is the case.

Sorry but I laughed at this.

WhatsGoingOnEh · 04/04/2015 13:31

He picks fights, you pick the venue, your feet, and terrible men.

WhatsGoingOnEh · 04/04/2015 13:33

if you get back together, share a bottle of red to celebrate resumption of the beginning of wedding planning. Then save your toenails in pretty little net bags, to use as confetti.

Spotifymuse · 04/04/2015 13:36

Definitely don't pick your toenails at the reception.

Sallystyle · 04/04/2015 13:40

He is on dating sites?

Why do you want to marry him?