To wonder why the whole family need a fun day out at outpatients?

[Welshmaenad]

I'm at fracture clinic, on my own (sob!) yet every other patient seems to be accompanied by at least three family members. Not only is the main waiting area packed but as patients are called through they ALL get up and trek into the very limited clinical waiting area. I'm currently standing up because a small boy in plaster has been followed I to clinical waiting by mum, dad, small sibling, baby sibling in pram and someone I presume is Aunt Maud or possibly a middle aged woman they found on the street and dragged along for the party.

Surely one companion is sufficient in all but the most exceptional of circumstances?? What's the appeal of an orthopaedic clinic waiting room when clinic is running an hour late? What is WRONG with these folk?

Thing is, the sort of people who need such a sign don't read the signs, or ignore them as they are selfish thoughtless ignorant arses. And -- IME anyway, the staff are usually too pushed to do more than every hour or so to clear the room if it's crowded. I used to have a weekly appointment which lasted 10-15 minutes, but generally had to wait at least an hour the NHS s wonderful but a lot of people take the p.

I haven't rtft, but it's funny, a friend of mine said this to me when her ds broke his arm. She said that she couldn't sit down because each patient seemed to have about 8 familly members there - she described is as grandparents, aunts , mum and dad, and a couple of dc

When I had a scan at the hospital, I got dh to drop me off alone and he took the dc off for a bit - I had said scan, then sat in the coffee shop with a pot of tea until he collected me. Scan was clear, and tea alone in a coffee shop, looking out of the window was bliss.

It's one of those things that hospitals don't seem able to police. I've had many stays since my son was diagnosed with Crohns at 6 yrs old & would always wait til he was asleep before creeping outside to give a progress report to the family. Then I realised that the world & his wife were ignoring the signs banning the use of mobiles so gave up, just as much as I gave up mentioning how disturbing the extended-family picnic that occurred nightly around the bed across from us was.

Yes lat time I was in hospital with a ward full of very sick people, the woman in the bed opposite had 7 people visit her every day, plus 2 young kids who ran about the ward. It would have been fine if they had been quiet, but they were so loud. And it must have been exhausting for their relative as well.

I had a similar thing the other day at a daytime weekday children's dermatology clinic session.

A child, maybe 11 years old, with a mum and dad and what looked like a granny and two aunts. There weren't enough seats. I had to stand with coat (always boiling in hospitals!) rucksack with gubbins for 6 month old and 6 month old in my arms.

Luckily the appointments were running on time and I was in and out fairly quickly! I didn't ask for a seat as baby is small and light and I wasn't too bothered, but it's annoying when seats aren't available when a whole extended family decide they want to turn up too....I was also thinking, don't they have to be at work?!

I was asked to leave A& E once My ancient father broke his hip, mother naturally didn't want to leave him. Both were stone deaf, father was confused and mother not much better.

I was told if I wanted to stay then mother would have to wait outside (and possibly wander off)

The reason I particularly felt I needed to be there was when they came to take medical history - "Any history of heart trouble?" "No" they both said, forgetting the 5 previous admissions with heart failure or MI. Neither were able to give a medical history and mother was more concerned that last time they were there someone brought round tea and sandwiches and she would quite like some.

I stayed but wasn't popular - father died 6 days later... I'd do it again.

So the problem is seat hogging, not taking family members with you to hospital?

And the snacking in waiting areas and round hospital beds. If you're hungry go for a meal. OK the patient eating there but whole families chomping on non-essential smelly food like crisps is silly. I also think if you must take extended families with you then keep the noise down, but generally think 1 person is enough. I'm not sure why granny ever has to come unless she is the patient.

I think routine outpatients appointments are somewhat different from real emergencies and Caff, I wouldn't be bothered for a minute about a situation like yours where there's a very sick child and family clearly need to be there.

I ended up in a&e myself last year with sudden onset cellulitis that everyone seemed quite worried about (with my kids in tow too actually, as dh was out and couldn't be contacted). There was a large group of people waiting for news on a young man who had been stabbed and was in very poor shape. It didn't occur to me for a minute to object to them, they were all clearly desperately worried - but also very nice and considerate, they shuffled together so there was space for the kids and I to sit together, and when I apologised for my children possibly intruding on their distress (little one is chatty) they said it was nice to have the distraction. Nice family, I hope things worked out for them. THAT, no issues. 40 million people traipsing into clinical areas where one genuinely would do - go away.

Presumably it's the same families who dawdle around supermarkets en masse, with 4 grizzling toddlers and 'Auntie Trish' and 'Nana Sue' in attendance.

Why? Why? Why?

My auntie would look at me like this if I suggested she accompany me around the local supermarket for a family centric jaunt. DH would simply run for the hills.

I think it's because these families operate under a low level 'hive' consciousness. Largely incapable of functioning independently of each other.

And of course the fact that the extended family of adults can all apparently drop everything to spend several hours in A&E during the day indicates they have little urgent and compelling to do with their time. Clearly they're not at work. So a trip to the A&E or any general hospital appointment transmutes into an 'outing' and social event. A welcome change of scene etc.

Plus chances are they are secretly intimidated by the clinical setting and the health care professionals. They are probably rather confused by the procedures and ignorant of what is happening. All rather stressful and frightening so there's a feeling of comfort and security in bringing along the rest of the clan.

I was also thinking, don't they have to be at work?!

I think that the sort of people who see going to A&E as a family day out are probably not the sort of people who are in work ...

Yanbu.

I once had to drive my friend to hospital and had to take our DCs (3 of them). I took them to Costa whilst she waited. Her parents came and I took DS home and her dad took her dcs home.

Another time my friend needed to take her dd to a&e. Because her dd needed an adult with her in car I drove and my DS stayed at home with her other children and her DH. We decided this way as it was literally just under 48 hours after her DH had had a sickness bug.

Appointmemts - not a chance! I wouldn't take anyone with me or go with someone. I spend enough time at hospital with my DS I am not going unless its an emergency!

When I had DC3 there was a flu epidemic and the hospital banned all visitors except partners from the maternity wards. It was bliss.

Because they should be on Jeremy Kyle?

Our nearest fracture clinic is always heaving and yet people still turn up en masse.

When I broke my ankle we were luckily able to leave the DC with a neighbour as it would have been horrendous taking them to A&E which, IMO, isn't a place for children to be unless they have to be (drunks shouting, people handcuffed to prison officers or policemen, people threatening to kill themselves, patients dripping blood all over the waiting area etc - all examples I've seen on my few trips to A&E).

When my follow-up appointments in fracture clinic were in the school holidays DP and the DC would drop me at the hospital and then go off somewhere and do something nearby until I phoned to be picked up. I was happy enough on my own pretending to read a book whilst secretly people-watching in the waiting room.

I meant to add to my post that another downside to extended families cluttering up waiting rooms is they get in the way - in A&E I was in a small side waiting room in a wheelchair with my broken ankle out in front of me on the raised section of the wheelchair when a family traipsed past trying to find seats. The Grandad (who was not the patient but one of a group accompanying a patient)'s coat caught that he was carrying my foot as he went past trying to squash into the room.

I might have sworn .