Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To wonder why the whole family need a fun day out at outpatients?

219 replies

Welshmaenad · 25/03/2015 12:21

I'm at fracture clinic, on my own (sob!) yet every other patient seems to be accompanied by at least three family members. Not only is the main waiting area packed but as patients are called through they ALL get up and trek into the very limited clinical waiting area. I'm currently standing up because a small boy in plaster has been followed I to clinical waiting by mum, dad, small sibling, baby sibling in pram and someone I presume is Aunt Maud or possibly a middle aged woman they found on the street and dragged along for the party.

Surely one companion is sufficient in all but the most exceptional of circumstances?? What's the appeal of an orthopaedic clinic waiting room when clinic is running an hour late? What is WRONG with these folk?

OP posts:
missymayhemsmum · 25/03/2015 21:01

Bizarre. Tho when dd (then 15) got hit on the head in a freak post-exam pebble-skimming accident I was very touched that all 30 friends present escorted her to A+E a and waited for her to be seen. (only six best friends in waiting room, rest outside on grass)

Hillingdon · 25/03/2015 21:11

There are certainly some on this thread who seem to think they are the exception. I don't drive so EVERYONE needs to come. We all know A and E wait times are long. Why on earth do you need to take partner and other kids. Just why do you clog up the waiting room?

TheSingingMonkey · 25/03/2015 21:13

It's the same though when 17 relatives turn up to see a patient on the ward and then are miffed when you tell them that no you can't all visit at the same time.

UptheChimney · 25/03/2015 21:24

Thank you to all the lovely nurses on this thread who try to consider all patients, in the face of what often looks like selfishness of a few patients.

My experience of a small crowded waiting room was that if they could, nurses or receptionist did quietly go around sorting out who should be there & who could wait elsewhere, so us actual patients could sit down.

But often, the staff were so pushed for time, we all had to work around the sightseers. My disability at the time was such (ie not too bad) that I could sit on the floor, if I got really tired, but others weren't so able or limber.

Annietheacrobat · 25/03/2015 21:24

Unfortunately the woman opposite me was allowed about 14 visitors n when I was being induced.

At least 5 of them opened my curtains by mistake.

There must have been about 4 generations of her family there. Couldn't believe it when they started loudly complaining that the midwife hadn't shown her how to bathe her newborn.

Hillingdon · 25/03/2015 21:24

Only one attendee per patient. Signs everywhere stating this, they can travel in the car, they can wait outside but fgs - it's not a day out cultural or some other reason!

WayfaringStranger · 25/03/2015 21:24

Having another adult with you for support is normal and expected in some hospital outpatient clinics, especially given the news some people may receive. More than that in the waiting room is unnecessary; it creates noise that can be aggravating to others and they take up space. I have complex health problems and spend a lot of time in various hospital waiting rooms, they are busy places where you might be spending several hours.

Hillingdon · 25/03/2015 21:25

Annie - that must have been nice for you!

Hillingdon · 25/03/2015 21:26

So, bar a few people all on this thread agree with limiting the amount of hangers on. What do we do about it?

Annietheacrobat · 25/03/2015 21:28

Well I moved to an area where the local (nhs) hospital only has single ensuite rooms!

PunkrockerGirl · 25/03/2015 21:31

YANBU.

I agree, it's like in the supermarket. Why does there have to be mum, dad and 3 whinging kids trailing round. Why doesn't one adult stay at home with the kids, it's not exactly a fun day out Confused

Hillingdon · 25/03/2015 21:36

Don't forget the kids with the parents and the scooters in the supermarket.

canweseethebunnies · 25/03/2015 21:37

I have to admit this was us once, but I can explain!

One Saturday morning dd, aged 5, broke her foot. I was eight months pregnant so couldn't carry her to and from the car, but as dp is not her dad and she was quite distressed, I thought I'd better go too.

It was contact weekend with her dad and he was already on route, with his 1 year old. I sent him a garbled text saying we were heading to a&e and once inside had no reception, so he turned up. So there was me heavily pregnant, dp, ex plus baby and my five year old dd all milling about in x-Ray deptBlush God knows what they thought of us!

Hillingdon · 25/03/2015 21:39

I actually think it is an outing for some.. Or perhaps they haven't worked out that one of them could stay a home or if one cannot drive drop off and come back later.

Just throwing out ideas.

canweseethebunnies · 25/03/2015 21:39

*en route

WayfaringStranger · 25/03/2015 21:43

A&E situations are slightly different, although I still don't see why the extra people can't hang out in the cafeteria rather than cluttering up and making a racket in the waiting rooms.

Debinaround · 25/03/2015 21:45

After I had my son I got a nasty infection and was in and out of hospital as a out patient.

The bit I had to go to was ALWAYS packed. I used to go on my own and leave DS at home with DH. I would sit there and watch as people would come into the waiting area with various friends and family and clog up the seats. Nobody ever seemed to come on their own. (Except me obviously)

The best one was a older couple with their daughter and grandson. Grandson in a giant buggy. He had one of those "Alfie Bears" that sing and talk in the most irritating voice. That kid had the life of everybody in the waiting room while his mother and grandparents looked on proudly.

I wanted to kill that bear.

mariamin · 25/03/2015 21:48

I had to attend outpatients for IV antibiotics. Everyone there was there for the same reason. I was usually the only person by myself. Some regularly brought an entourage, which made the clinic crowded and noisy.

Hillingdon · 25/03/2015 21:49

I think in some families they want to hear and see what is going on as it happens! Give their views etc live as it were.

The doctors and nurses must have to bite their tongues.

CaTsMaMmA · 25/03/2015 21:52

we get similar at work with a family day out to the opticians

especially after school...I often just say "parent and child only, Home Bargains is lots more fun than the waiting room, we'll see you all back in 20 minutes" ....the hangers on usually take the hint! :o

Sandbrook · 25/03/2015 21:52

This type of shit drives me scatty. My last pg I went to hospital appt and there was a family there, all grossly obese so took up a lot of space. Pregnant girl, two sisters, mother, child and infant in a buggy. They sat in corner so seat right in corner was left empty and they took up 4 seats to the left of corner and 4 seats to the right.
One pregnant woman stood for her whole wait of approx 2 hours.

Caff2 · 25/03/2015 21:55

When my DS2 had meningitis, 2 grandparents rocked up, his dad and I were already there too, and my older son was fetched when we realised it was really serious (you are, in my experience anyway, in a bit of denial at the beginning of something like that).

I don't feel guilty at all. My son lived, the little girl in the room next to him after admission didn't, and it's still the scariest thing that's ever happened to me.

Theycallmemellowjello · 25/03/2015 21:55

Aw this thread is a bit mean. Why does it matter if people's families come to the hospital? There are presumably loads of reasons people come in together - travel issues, mobility issues, language issues, childcare issues, not wanting family member to go through something scary/painful/sad alone. I can't really think of a reason why they shouldn't have others alone. Where's the harm? Of all the things to worry about...

Hillingdon · 25/03/2015 21:56

Sorry to sound like an old record. Signs up saying no more than one attendee per patient?

Is it that difficult?

Only1scoop · 25/03/2015 21:58

Yanbu....

It's like Blinkin ....it's like me....me mom ....me dad....and me gran plus 3 in those waiting areas lately

Swipe left for the next trending thread