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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To consider dumping boyfriend over his bacon obsession???

123 replies

GinaHair · 19/03/2015 16:20

Been seeing someone for about 3 months. First date we went out for a meal and I happened to mention that I didn't like bacon. Well he went on and on and on about it, must have mentioned it about 6 times over the night saying he couldn't understand someone not liking bacon etc. It started off as a joke, I laughed along but by the end of the night I was getting a bit Hmm (ok drop it now eh?).

Apart from that little detail he was lovely in all ways - so I went for date number 2. Another meal. Whilst sat looking at the menu he said "ooo bacon carbonara that sounds lovely! shall I order us two of those?" (and he was deadly serious). I said "no I don't like bacon remember" and he immediately went off again with "oh thats right!! you're a non bacon fan! wow I just don't get it! so how long have you not liked bacon for?" etc etc. after two more mentions of bacon I said "ok look can we drop the bacon thing now? it's getting a bit tedious". He apologised and agreed he would drop it.

Well anyway as I've said it's been 3 months and whilst everything else is great this bloody bacon thing will not fuck off and I'm finding it so frustrating. Everytime we go out to eat he mentions it, everytime its on TV he gets excited and brings it up, he even went as far as to photograph a packet of bacon crisps and post it on my facebook wall saying "stalked" or some shit.

Yesterday we met up with friends and he started on about it and tried to embarrass me saying I didn't eat bacon because I'm a muslim (I'm not, I'm athiest) and because I like fluffy pigs etc etc and I snapped and shouted at him. Friends thought I was out of order because they don't realise the scale of this fucking bacon thing. Now I feel like a twat and I'm furious at him. Thinking of calling it a day with him but everything else is so perfect I just don't get why he's doing it Sad

OP posts:
BoyScout · 19/03/2015 16:22

This is the weirdest problem I've ever read about.

ElphabaTheGreen · 19/03/2015 16:23

What an irritating fuck.

Have you had a proper sit-down serious chat about it?

I'd twat him. I've never liked bacon either.

Hobby2014 · 19/03/2015 16:24

What Boy said ^^ Grin

UghReally · 19/03/2015 16:24

Tell him to grow the f--k up.

IHaveBrilloHair · 19/03/2015 16:24

I'd dump him, it's weird behaviour.

Duckdeamon · 19/03/2015 16:24
Grin
Mostlyjustaluker · 19/03/2015 16:25

I have you told him to fuck off with the bacon thing? If you have and he still doing it then dump him. If you have'nt tell him to fuck off with the bacon thing.

sparkysparkysparky · 19/03/2015 16:25

He loves his joke doesnâ??t he? He clearly doesn't realise it's not the bacon thing that's pissing you off its the turning of it into A Thing.
TBH, I think you know the answer. Maybe he'll get wise to himself and give it a rest.

Totality22 · 19/03/2015 16:25

Is 'everything else' great if he is trying to embarrass you in front of friends?

The fact that he is like a dog with a bone would rile me. Not to mention the whole Muslim thing. .. how clever you don't eat bacon so must be Muslim. Knob.

magimedi · 19/03/2015 16:25

BLT (Bastard, leave the)

Dilligufdarling · 19/03/2015 16:26

Have you tried talking to him about this separately and calmly (not in the heat of the moment)?

Maybe he just doesn't "get" how utterly annoying this is?

kwerty · 19/03/2015 16:26

YABU - to not like bacon ....

Tournesol · 19/03/2015 16:26

If it bothers you that much I think you need to dump him.

richthegreatcornholio · 19/03/2015 16:26

I'm stuck with the concept that you don't like bacon!Grin

Totality22 · 19/03/2015 16:26

It's pissed me off just reading about him!

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 19/03/2015 16:26

I would not stay with someone who was treating me like that.

I don't blame you for shouting at him!

Original poster
GinaHair · 19/03/2015 16:28

I have tried talking to him, I sat him down and said I understood that it started off as a joke but it's got boring, I'm sick of hearing it. He apologised and said he understood and he stopped for about a week and then a shop called the bacon hut flicked the switch back on again

OP posts:
FenellaFellorick · 19/03/2015 16:28

He is really weird. I'd probably dump him.

I find that it is stupid seemingly trivial things like this that actually give you a glimpse into what someone is truly like.

Remove the bacon, (because what it is really doesn't matter, the bacon isn't the issue at all) and you are left with someone who is unwilling or unable to accept your right to a different view, someone who doesn't listen when you say that you do not want them to behave in a certain way because you find it unacceptable and someone who thinks that it is ok to take something about you and take the piss out of you.

It's not 'only bacon', it's the attitude that is coming through over something so trivial.

Either that or he has a bacon fetish in which case you should drill a hole in a side of pork and leave him to it.

diddl · 19/03/2015 16:29

He tried to embarrass you?

That's reason enough right there to tell him to fuck off imo!

PinkFlamingo100 · 19/03/2015 16:31

Before you dump him, fill the glove compartment of his car with bacon. And say nothing.

Bellwether · 19/03/2015 16:32

My nice answer is: I wonder if he has Asperger's or is on the autism spectrum? Only as some cases can manifest into obsessing over a single topic and then banging on about long after everyone else has got bored and not being able to read the signs. "Liking bacon" (including bacon-flavoured products, like soap or cheese or cake) was a sort of fad amongst online/hipster communities about three years ago. It's had its day. Like lolcats or moustaches. I wonder if he glommed onto it back then and still thinks him saying 'bacon' is a funny joke, a substitute for a personality and marks him out as 'cool' and 'down the with online crowd' or something equally cringeworthy.

My nasty answer is he sounds like a bully - he's found something that annoys you and he likes seeing you annoyed, likes poking and prodding and seeing how far he can go, even going so far as to be racist (calling you 'a muslim') and trying to belittle you in front of your friends.

Get rid. If it's option A he needs to seek help and learn some conversational strategies. If it's B, then bacon is chapter 1 in a long and depressing story. I don't like the sound of a man who belittles and bullies someone for a minor difference in food taste. What's his reaction going to be if you dislike something significant he does, like (random examples) being messy, borrowing/splurging money or heavy drinking?

raffle · 19/03/2015 16:32

You should train yourself to like bacon. Problem eradicated.

FooferFluff · 19/03/2015 16:33

Dump. He will never stop doing this. It's disrespect.

ElphabaTheGreen · 19/03/2015 16:34

You've had a serious conversation about it. Improvement was only temporary. One more serious convo needed, including the words, 'I'm thinking of ending it over this.' If that doesn't stop him, LTBLT (Leave The Bacon-Loving Twat).

RandomFriend · 19/03/2015 16:35

YANBU, both for not liking bacon and for thinking dumping him because he embarrassed you in front of friends.

Just because everything he does that annoys you is focused on the "bacon joke" at the moment doesn't mean he won't continue to do things that are weird. Once he calms down about the bacon, he'll probably start on something else. Take this as a red flag.