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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

"Benefits are a lifestyle choice for so many these days"

999 replies

Bellerina2 · 09/03/2015 11:31

I'm on the bus and two women behind me are having a long conversation about perceived benefit cheats and one of them just said the above phrase. WIBU to hit her over the head with a rolled up copy of the Guardian??

But seriously, it's so depressing that people think this. Well done to the government and likes of the Sun and Daily Mail for convincing people that those on benefits are leading some sort of charmed life Sad

OP posts:
Original poster
Bellerina2 · 09/03/2015 11:32

Oh and before I'm berated for eavesdropping I should add that the entire bus can probably hear their conversation!

OP posts:
LuisSuarezTeeth · 09/03/2015 11:34

That sounds terribly familiar.

fixedit · 09/03/2015 11:36

Some people have no clue.

LuisSuarezTeeth · 09/03/2015 11:38

Got to be a very specific MNer

FernGullysWoollyPully · 09/03/2015 11:38

I wish I'd had a choice when I suddenly became a single mum with 3 children under 4 and my ex decided he would clean out my bank account of the rent money and then not help physically or financially for years.

A charmed life? I think not.

BishopBrennansArse · 09/03/2015 11:39

It's bollocks Smile

capsium · 09/03/2015 11:42

Not a lifestyle I would actively choose in this day and age. With all the Benefit Cheat style programmes and news articles, the sanctions, the cuts - seems a precarious way of life, with everybody judging the minutiae of your personal situation. This is viewing it from the outside, as I do.

AbCdEfGh123 · 09/03/2015 12:01

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

richthegreatcornholio · 09/03/2015 12:01

Well for a minority it IS a lifestyle choice and there are genuinely people out there who would rather be on benefits than work. Certainly not as prevalent as the press would have you believe.

GlitzAndGigglesx · 09/03/2015 12:03

It is a lifestyle choice for my sisters friend who was offered 4 hours a day during school hours but turned them down because she thinks she's too good to work in a supermarket

TheCuttingEdge · 09/03/2015 12:05

It is a lifestyle choice for some. I have members of my own family making this choice.

ChipDip · 09/03/2015 12:10

It is a lifestyle choice though for many, many people who are abusing it. She is absolutely correct.

kinkyfuckery · 09/03/2015 12:10

But it can be a lifestyle choice for some...

SaucyJack · 09/03/2015 12:13

Rather depends how you define "so many" really. It's probably quite true if you count tax credits- and I include myself in that btw,

EhricLovesTheBhrothers · 09/03/2015 12:16

It is a lifestyle choice for some people.
I'm not a benefit basher and I've been on them myself but some people do actively choose to remain on benefits rather than work.
It's a pretty crap lifestyle and not one I envy but it does happen.

KERALA1 · 09/03/2015 12:18

It is for some. Bil works in fe with socially deprived kids some of the parents get very put out and threatened by their dc training for jobs. Attitude of some is why bother, who do you think you are going for a job we claim benefits in this family. Know it's lovely being a middle class liberal guardian reader (I am one) but for some people it is a lifestyle choice.

Feminine · 09/03/2015 12:19

It is never really a choice though. After watching some of those 'benefit living style' programmes,l haven't changed my mind. Some families never really catch any luck.

Samcro · 09/03/2015 12:19

bingo

SunnyBaudelaire · 09/03/2015 12:21

lifestyle schmlifestyle.
There ARE people who lead their lives assuming they can just 'sign on' forever, I know cos I have met some of them. However, I really would not envy their 'lifestyle'.

Rednotpinkorgreen · 09/03/2015 12:22

I work with a housing charity and for some of our residents it absolutely is the way they see life. Any other "choice" just doesn't seem real no matter how it's presented. And those of us with nice safe affluent lives got lucky, like winning the X factor. They've not joined up that hard work and jobs and discipline can result in anything better than that which they already have.

catsandstuff · 09/03/2015 12:24

regardless of whether it's a good choice, it IS a lifestyle choice for many!

dotty2 · 09/03/2015 12:25

I'm a liberal middle class Guardian reader, and want to believe that it isn't a lifestyle choice. However, I spent the lunch of a conference last week talking to someone who works with children and families for the local council, with a specialism in children missing school. She spent a lot of the lunch trying to convince me that, for a lot of the people she works with, it really is a choice. If you'd only be £50 better off a week working, some people perceive it as not worth it - 'why should I work for £1 an hour', plus not valuing education for their kids, not encouraging them to attend school etc. I found it a very depressing conversation, tbh. Still don't believe it's a majority of benefit claimants, by any means, however.

improbablesaint · 09/03/2015 12:25

i deal a lot with people for whom this is true. Men in their 20s who have never worked. Claim benefits or sponge off their long suffering mothers. Always mothers oddly. Grin

PurpleSwift · 09/03/2015 12:25

It is for some. Consider this though, imagine that everyone on unemployment benefits were actually looking for jobs. It's hard enough as it is, the people sitting on their bums not trying are almost doing us a favour. I imagine there would be riots if they ALL actually wanted a job, because they just aren't there.

lemonade30 · 09/03/2015 12:25

Case in point that in one of the gutter press women's mags there was a woman claiming to ostensibly be living a life of luxury with her three kids on benefits totalling 16k.

I want to ask her how she affords luxury on such a meagre income..

If she chooses that existence then fair play to her. She doesn't deserve either my derision or my envy.

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