Well it was last summer....
Leave work and wander down town in the glorious sunshine - check
Attempt to walk past Gregg's without buying two sausage rolls and fail - check
Pop into large department store and find gorgeous dress - check
Go into changing room to discover it's on the wrong hanger and is actually size ten - check
Think, aw these 36DD's will squash in there and the two sausage rolls are nothing really and attempt to put on dress - check
Dress is too small, must be the bra (of course) pull dress over head and take off bra - check
Zip appears stuck, pull dress over head and attempt to pull down without taking down zip - check
Dress is stuck, attempt to pull dress back over head with a negative result - check
Make reasonable, but muffled attempt to attract attention of sales person/changing room assistant and fail (she's chatting to other customers as it's very busy - check
Make numerous other attempts to get now very stuck and twisted dress off resulting in profuse sweating and thoughts of "could I just hide here until they close?" But dress is not moving - check
Concede defeat and leave changing room with one arm straight up smashed against side of face and some of head coming out of head home in dress, other arm stuck down by my side and a very ample breast hanging (yes hanging) out of the arm hole of the dress - check
Leave cubicle and walk length of changing rooms just saying "help" repeatedly - check
Get girl to help, get dress off, throw clothes on faster than a speeding bullet - check
Leave changing rooms with as much dignity as possible and get stopped by lovely older lady who helpfully informed me my bra had attached itself to the arse of my uniform and I was walking about with it swinging like a tail - check
Repeatedly say to self "you are such a fanny!" - check