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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that no, I don't want to watch cbeebies all day

153 replies

Writerwannabe83 · 01/03/2015 13:33

I have a DS who has just turned 11 months old and he has very limited interest in the TV unless he's climbing up it or banging his toys against it.

I will very frequently have the TV on in the background when I'm playing with DS but this is mainly so I can catch up on my recorded programmes by half listening to them as it's rare I actually get the chance to properly sit down and watch them.

Sometimes though, if DS is happily entertaining himself with his books or toys I will settle on the sofa and watch TV with a cup of tea for twenty minutes.

I have never seen a problem with any of this.

However, on three occasions now I have had friends visit (without children) and whilst they are here I obviously have the TV volume down but it's still showing a recorded programme that I'm semi-watching as I like background noise plus it means I can still take occasional peeks at the screen to follow the storyline.

During their visits, when I left the room to get them a drink or go the loo or something I returned to the living room to see they had put cbeebies on and turned the volume up so that "DS could hear it" Hmm

I can only assume that on all of these occasions they thought that if the TV was on in the background then it should be on a channel that is designed for children.

I wouldn't mind so much if I returned to find cbeebies on but that DS was engrossed in it, but he never ever is. He's paying no notice to it whatsoever.

It really annoys me, their assumption that DS wants to watch cbeebies or that I'm doing him some kind of disservice by it not being on.

I also think it's pretty rude to change someone's TV channel when they leave the room Grin

The only time DS really watches the TV is when I'm watching The Chase Grin

I know cbeebies is likely to be a Godsend as DS gets older but do I really have to have it on all day just because I have a child??!!

It drives me mad!!

I may start hiding the TV remote when these specific friends visit Grin

OP posts:
GotToBeInItToWinIt · 01/03/2015 16:59

*judgey

SisterMoonshine · 01/03/2015 17:07

It must be like going round to see The Royle Family.

CupidStuntSurvivor · 01/03/2015 17:09

No need to be rude.

Original poster
Writerwannabe83 · 01/03/2015 17:21

The Royle Family were brilliant Grin

OP posts:
fattymcfatfat · 01/03/2015 17:23

I miss the royle family Sad

Buglife · 01/03/2015 17:26

But I go to my friends house in the day to hang out with them as they go about their general business, not to expect them to drop everything and entertain me. Most often if they had the tv on it wod be ignored, but it's never occurred to me to be annoyed it was on. If I'd gone for dinner or drinks and tv was on that would be odd, but not every visit to a friend is a special occasion, sometimes a friend drops by in the day for an hour. OP said it was on in the background, not that she sat watching it and couldn't bear her friends talking to her. I just think all the people saying 'it's so incredibly rude' are a bit harsh.

Original poster
Writerwannabe83 · 01/03/2015 17:26

This thread reminds me of a Friends episode where someone has told Joey that they don't own a TV and he looks absolutely horrified before saying, "But what does all your furniture point at?!" Grin

OP posts:
Buglife · 01/03/2015 17:29

And comments such as SisterMoonshine are an example of actual rudeness :) face it, most people here are being judgy because they feel very genteel and think TV in the day is common :)

ahbollocks · 01/03/2015 17:29

I dont turn off if its family round, we usually put music video channels on because toddler dd does a funny jig whenever beyonce comes on.
Agree that switching to cbeebies is a panicky 'oh fuck what do kids like?!'' thing to do

Buglife · 01/03/2015 17:29

"Writer* Grin

Panzee · 01/03/2015 17:31

The only people who visit me are good friends and family. If it's chit chat the TV will stay on.

Masterchef is an excellent choice for children. Non violent, not much swearing, no sex. And the added bonus of not being fecking Spongebob. What's not to love?

Fairylea · 01/03/2015 17:48

Mumsnet is the only place both online and in real life that I have ever encountered such anti television fanatics. Most people I've met either have the tv on in the background all the time or just let their dc watch suitable programmes whenever they want to. It's so bizarre to me that people on here frequently say they limit tv to maybe 15 mins or 30 mins a day for their children. That's hardly anything and then they wonder why their children get upset when they turn it off!

What is even more bizarre is that the same people regularly post on mumsnet to let off steam and for entertainment but they don't acknowledge the benefits of screen time for their children in terms of simple fun and relaxation.

We have the tv on all day. No tv in bedrooms and only suitable tv programmes to be on around the dc. But we do like having something on in the background, but not overpoweringly loud. I think a lot of the time by people making it a holy grail children are far more bothered about it than if it's just on all the time. A lot of the time mine just ignore it and play with toys anyway.... so I sneakily turn it over to this morning or whatever other stuff I fancy.

If I have visitors I don't think I would attempt to watch a programme I'd recorded because I couldn't concentrate but I wouldn't turn it off either. I'd just make sure it wasn't too loud.

FluffyJawsOfDoom · 01/03/2015 17:53

Maybe they change it to CBeebies so you will talk to them instead of watching tv. Yabvu!

SuggestmeaUsername · 01/03/2015 17:59

Turn the TV off when you have visitors but put a music CD on at low volume if you like background noise

GotToBeInItToWinIt · 01/03/2015 18:06

Fairy for me isn't nothing to do with being 'anti TV'. I have nothing against television, but I only have it on if I'm actually watching something that I want to watch, and therefore concentrating on it. This is why I would never have it on when visitors are round, as I wouldn't be concentrating on the TV. I've never had it on in the background, or put it on when I'm not actually watching it.

kim147 · 01/03/2015 18:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

FromSeaToShining · 01/03/2015 18:09

I wouldn't leave the TV on if I had visitors. And sneaking a glance at the TV every so often? Very rude IMO. It's just like the people who are surgically attached to their phones and constantly check them when they are meant to be having a conversation.

But changing channels on someone else's TV is also rude. So I suppose the rudeness score is 1-1. Smile

MrsTedCrilly · 01/03/2015 18:13

YANBU! This thread just proves how different we all are, no preference is better than the other. Everyone I know keeps the tele on, with low volume of course, but it just feels less formal that way and comforting when there's a lull in conversation! We still have each others attention. Usually not watching something that needs concentration though! Wink

MsAnndrist · 01/03/2015 18:56

I'm a bit Shock that there's adults who actually need to have the TV on to fall asleep! I think it's quite sad that TV has taken over to that extent.

Ispentitwithyou · 01/03/2015 21:02

Its a strange one isn't it, I don't like the TV being on when I have visitors as o find it harder to concentrate on the conversation....however several times they have asked me why I haven't got the TV on or asked to have it on in the background!!,I must be very dull....

Leeds2 · 01/03/2015 21:15

If a friend had TV on in the background when I went to visit, I probably wouldn't go again. I think it is really rude.

I wouldn't/didn't have TV on in the background as a general thing when DD was small. Yes, to watch a specific programme. Not as a usual thing. Just because you don't!!

MiaowTheCat · 01/03/2015 21:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

dietcokeandwine · 01/03/2015 21:51

I hate 'TV on as background noise' with a passion - I find it really stressful rather than soothing, same goes for the radio - but at the same time I can see why you'd be frustrated with friends assuming that your DS couldn't possibly entertain himself without cbeebies on.

There is definitely a halfway house between ferocious 'limiting screen time to 30 minutes a day' and having it on all day every day. My kids watch plenty of TV but it's definitely structured - as in, couple of programmes after lunch, couple more after tea type thing - rather than ad hoc throughout the day. Similarly DH and I usually have the TV on most evenings but I would never dream of having it on for us during the day, unless there was a major news story breaking in which case we'd have BBC News 24 on.

I must admit I would find it disconcerting to go to someone's house and find that they kept the TV on constantly, because I don't personally like it and would probably think them a bit rude if they kept sneaking a look at the screen to catch up with the storyline. But I certainly wouldn't change the channel to cbeebies because they happened to have a child.

Catsize · 01/03/2015 22:52

Another hater of TV being on with guests BUT I strongly suspect your friends are trying to chat to you without the distraction of your son, so think that CBeebies will enable this?

countessmarkyabitch · 01/03/2015 23:03

Changing the channel to cbeebies is a polite way of telling you to stop watching tv when you have guests!
I can't believe anyone could be so rude, tbh, as to sit and watch masterchef when someone has come to see you and spend time with you.

Its nothing to do with being anti-tv, we all watch tv in this house. But not when we have guests. And not as a constant blare in the background, constantly burbling on and on....