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Original poster

To be so upset that I've failed my driving test AGAIN!!!

184 replies

Lottie10000 · 26/02/2015 16:05

I'm so so upset.
I've got young children and it would make our lives so much easier.
I've been practising for a year, have taken well over 60 hours of lessons, mock tests all go brilliantly well and then I fail the real test.
I can't keep paying out for these tests as well as the instructors time but we have an automatic yet thought best to learn manual in case I ever need to change although after this last awful test today I'm thinking of buying the manual first so I can at least not have to pay the instructor again.
The first test was last month and just awful, I was so nervous , the instructor didn't talk at all, my nerves were shot to pieces with him and I missed a mini roundabout completely, bumped the kerb doing a turn in the road and then forgot to do the blind spot check as we pulled off so 3 majors ( no bloody minors! )
Today I got the guy who passes everyone my instructor said, he was lovely, chatted the whole way, I thought it had gone brilliantly and then he said id failed!
3 minors for gears and 1 major.
The major was for after doing my emergency stop, even though I checked all around me, in the distance was another car and I should have waited for them to go .
Just feel really shit that at 36 I'm finding this so fucking hard.
Passed the theory first time with 2 wrong answers.
Maybe it's just not meant to be.

OP posts:
BossWitch · 02/03/2015 08:14

If you are confident driving in traffic then yes, do it. See if you can get your instructor to take you on a two hour lesson around the test site so that it isn't totally unfamiliar.

When I was learning someone told me to always try for a rush hour test as you can't make many mistakes in crawling traffic!

manchestermummy · 02/03/2015 09:13

Just keep going!

I passed on my fourth attempt after a year's worth of lessons and several successful mock tests. For some reason I would make very silly mistakes in the real thing and would get maybe only one or two minors, but then one major, which if course is game over. I got a D on test three, however Blush.

What didn't help me was that I got the same examiner on two of the three failures and his manner made me even more nervous. The examiner who passed me put me at my ease, was clear in his instructions and didn't make me feel stupid. I was 17 (well it was the week before my 18th but I like to say I was 17 when I passed!) at the time and had I been older, I might have given some feedback.

I've been driving for 18 years now consider myself a safe and competent driver. When you pass - which you will! - the number of attempts will cease to be important.

Everyotherusernameistaken · 02/03/2015 09:38

On the test I eventually passed I had the same examiner and same route in which I had failed so spectacularly the first time!

Original poster
Lottie10000 · 02/03/2015 15:03

Thankyou,
I think I'll give the new area a go next week, just to see if it calms my nerves not seeing the same examiners who failed me!! I think on the second time I was so nervous waiting to see who it was that threw me a little.
Nothing really to lose by giving it a go I guess :)

OP posts:
DonkeysDontRideBicycles · 02/03/2015 15:09

It seems that you are so close to passing, after the money spent what's one more test? You'll pass by September. Three's a charm!

MrsMarigold · 02/03/2015 15:14

Don't worry just book another test. I passed last year after god knows how many attempts (about nine but I stopped counting). Good luck and persevere it will change your life.

UmizoomiThis · 02/03/2015 15:20

Noooooo!!!!!

There is a reason the 8am slot is open!

Never ever take the test during rush hour. All the school run parents driving like maniacs will be your minors and majors as you're somehow meant to guess their stupidity and avoid it.

Also there's a very single lane bridge over rail tracks that I always saw cars with L plates on, so I assume it's on the test route.

UmizoomiThis · 02/03/2015 15:21

Scary not single. But it's also single lane. And you have pedestrians too (playground nearby) but there's no room for a car and a pedestrian at the same time.

Original poster
Lottie10000 · 02/03/2015 16:55

My second test was also at 8am and I didn't find it any worse than the 2.30 one other that it went quicker due to being in traffic lots !

OP posts:
SansaUndercover · 02/03/2015 17:31

I was also advised that the 8am time is the worst- more traffic, more impatient traffic as people are commuting, potentially more people on foot and cyclists too, which won't help.

September is a long time away, and from your reaction to this test, it seems like it would be worse to take the test at a difficult time in a strange place and fail than wait a bit and be a bit calmer. That said, if you genuinely go into it with a "nothing to lose" attitude, maybe you will be ok?

If you are still struggling in a few months perhaps consider a week's intensive course?

I would say try to avoid putting so much pressure on yourself- extra nerves won't help. Failing a few times and passing 3rd or 4th time is really common, as it takes a while to get used to the test format with a stranger and get over your nerves.

Original poster
Lottie10000 · 02/03/2015 18:34

Yes my plan is to go into this one as it's a mock test and see if I find the route better as though the new area is busier the old one has much tighter roads and things
September is a while away it's just hard as the tests are generally being a month wait! Which I don't have a manual to drive inbetween but also don't have money to keep doing lessons to keep the rhythm going!

OP posts:
Claybury · 02/03/2015 18:39

Go automatic!
I have driven an automatic for 20 years - in the UK. Never a problem. So much easier in town
DS is learning on an automatic. Why not ? He can learn manual in the future if he wants.
Good luck you're nearly there.

dazzlingdeborahrose · 02/03/2015 20:17

Six here. Took lessons in my twenties. Failed three times and couldn't afford to carry on. Started back up when pregnant with my first. Failed next two tests and passed the third (6th). Hubby despaired as I was throwing up in a bin outside the test centre with nerves. Guess I showed him Wink. Keep going. You'll get there.

Birdinthebush · 02/03/2015 20:22

Don't give up it took me ahem eight times . Like you I was a massive bags of nerves , but a friend recommended a hypnotherapist and it worked for me . On the test I took the wrong exit at a roundabout the instructor pointed it out and instead of bursting into tears I kept calm. Although when he said i had passed I asked him are you sure? Good luck OP

Original poster
Lottie10000 · 03/03/2015 07:56

Yes I am going to keep going, I've spent hundreds ( probably over a thousand ) in lessons so I honestly do know how to drive!
The test just seems to throw me off unfortunately and it all goes wrong!! Have booked for next Thursday, I know it's a new area and will be busy as at 8am but the other test centre has nothing until April anyway so figured for £62 I may as well give it a shot, I might find it better than the old location and if not I'll know to stick to the afternoon and make sure I get a aftenoon slot only!

OP posts:
AmberNectarine · 03/03/2015 08:13

It took me SIX attempts to pass my test. Drove me fucking mental - I'm intelligent, articulate, I can read and write Latin FFS. But I just could not get the hang of it. If anything the ways in which I managed to fail got more elaborate and ridiculous - I had NO hope for my sixth attempt, in fact at the end I sat there grumbling 'well, seventh time's a charm...'

And then the examiner said 'Well, Mrs Nectarine... ... I'm very pleased to tell you you've passed!'

I said 'Are you JOKING?'. He assured me he was not and I proposed marriage.

That was 2 years ago and I now find driving like second nature. Honestly, if I can do it anyone can.

icedgem30 · 03/03/2015 08:22

Oh I know how you feel. I failed my 4th test and felt such a rage that I had a huge strop toddler style and said I was never driving again, this was in 2011.

Last year I did my theory again, all my lessons up to test standard and I chickened out and quit. The fails have knocked my confidence so much I dont think I will manage it again.

I do quietly fume when I think about all the wasted money Angry. I really hope you pass next time.

MrsKoala · 03/03/2015 08:37

You poor thing.

I failed 4 times. 2 in London. 1 in Leicester and 1 in Milton Keynes . The MK one i was heavily pregnant with DS1. I had been learning (on and off) for 20 years! Shock I spent ££££s. I always failed on one major. I eventually passed in an automatic while heavily pregnant with DS2 last July in Sevenoaks...WITH A COMPLETELY CLEAN SHEET Grin So you can do it too.

However, i still hate driving and am supremely shit at it. I have kind of decided not to do it anymore. I have 2 small children and it really should make my life easier, but i find it terrifying. i can't go over 45 without having major palpitations and a panic attack. I was driving at 48 in a 60 the other day and i was shaking. People were dangerously overtaking and swearing at me. For me the fact i took so long to pass was an indicator that it was just something i couldn't/shouldn't do. I look at everyone else driving and simply can't understand how they all can be so calm. I am also terrified of being on the motorway full stop, even as a passenger.

UmizoomiThis · 03/03/2015 08:48

Well OP I admire your attitude about doing a test on an unknown route at rush hour. For what it's worth, I don't think passing the test has that much to do with actual driving. Bizarre to say, but I base that on driving over two decades, holding licences from two other countries, and still not passing the UK test until my 3rd try. Smile

Original poster
Lottie10000 · 03/03/2015 09:18

I'm not scared of driving or speed luckily so there isn't a fear of driving, not even of the test really, it's very odd as I said I honestly thought I had passed last time! I don't think I'm a bad driver and I'm determined to just carry on until i do pass.
It's so bloody expensive every test, money for the instructors car and an hours drive beforehand etc it's costing £130 a go!!
This test next week is going to be with a different instructor ( current instructors wife ) and I'm just hoping a change of scenery will help me out, and not throw me even more

OP posts:
SomewhereIBelong · 03/03/2015 09:33

Mrs Koala - you are not alone - I decided not to drive anymore too.... (the world is a safer place, and my world a less stressful one - without me driving).

OP - Another thing you can try - if you don't already, is the continual talk through - as if you are vocalising your actions and thoughts....

I passed first time, it was a technique taught by my instructor...

"nice quiet road, check speed, check mirrors, junction ahead, going straight on - move over to the left a bit so people know, parked car, move out give it a metre clearance - oh that's a big van, best stop so it can go through the gap first, there's a bike there, looks a bit wobbly, pulling away, mirrors, signal, checking blind spot, manouvre etc etc..."

calms the nerves, lets the examiner KNOW you have thought of the big things and seen the little ones.

dalekanium · 03/03/2015 09:39

I like rush hour tests ( I have licences for a couple of vehicle types, some I got first time, some I did NOT!)

Rush hour tests mean sitting in traffic for most of the test. Far less chance to fuck up :)

kilmuir · 03/03/2015 09:47

you will need to drive at any time of day, in various conditions. trying to control the test and amount of traffic is madness.

MrsKoala · 03/03/2015 09:51

I forgot to say op. Before my test i had a banana - calms nerves apparently. I also narrated out loud what i was doing, which while feeling a little silly, helped me make sure i was doing everything i should. It was like a check list. Especially on manouvres. 'Check over my shoulder, check over my other shoulder, look in my rear view mirror, reverse, turrn wheel one full turn, look again, indicate, check mirror, i'm going to stop here because altho i can't see anything coming it is a blind corner, creep slowly, creep, nothing there, okay, drive, this is a 30 road so increase speed slightly, road changed to 50 and conditions are good so speed up...etc'

FizzyMakeFeelNice · 03/03/2015 09:51

I passed first time in Sutton. I would say if you can get some practice in the area first, then go for it, especially on Rosehill Roundabout, as that can be tricky. Then again, I fixated on that roundabout before my test but then it didn't even come up!

One good thing about Sutton, you won't get bay parking on your test, as they don't have anywhere to do them! Good luck, and get some rescue remedy!