Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to find my BIL's declaration of love for my sister annoying and awkward?

137 replies

Daryldixonswife · 22/02/2015 19:30

For example we all had dinner at my mothers on Friday evening. We'll be having a conversation, and then he'll just come out with "god I love you" randomly in the middle of the conversation.

He does this quite a lot.

They have been married 7 years so not really in the honeymoon phase.

Of course I'm happy that me sister found someone who clearly adores and loves her but I don't think during group conversations you have to randomly interject with declarations of love for your partner.

OP posts:
YoGatoradeMeBitch · 23/02/2015 12:47

MY experience, MY opinion on MY friends and family. I'm not asking you to agree with me.

No need to derail the thread.

SirChenjin · 23/02/2015 12:52

The maybe you should make it clearer from the outset that it's based on your opinions of your family and friends, rather than posting about British people cracking you up, with the list of things we find "embarrassing", "mortifying" and "cringing" hysterical, or claiming that it's a British trait.

But yes, back to the thread (with no stereotyping)....

saoirse31 · 23/02/2015 12:54

sounds to me like it's just a habit and possibly an unconscious one. whatever, I really don't get the massive dislike of this.

YoGatoradeMeBitch · 23/02/2015 12:57

Error SirChenjin... That wasn't me with the "embarrassing" "mortyfying" etc. And nothing has me "cracking up" either Hmm

Calm yourself and get your quotes right.

Roussette · 23/02/2015 13:02

I think it's bloody rude! You are in the middle of a conversation and your BIL comes out with "god I love you..." to his wife. It would just as rude if he changed the subject and said something else. Cringeworthy too. There's nothing like a bit of affection but derailing conversation with that is weird.

Pressone please don't tell me you and your DH do "I love you's" in the middle of conversations with work colleagues... if so, totally inappropriate. Can't you wait until you don't have an audience?

Momagain1 · 23/02/2015 13:09

Members of my family, both American and British, might say it in a joking, or sarcastic, or glad I married you kind of way. Or even all 3 at once. But they would mean it.

The rest of us would respond variously by directing the same comment at them, each other, their own partners, the nearest child. With lots of laughter and over the top smoochy noises. Even actual kisses. The British side sould be less involved, but there's only 7 altogether, so things just dont get out of hand as with the dozens on the American side. Either way, every I love you would be meant.

God I love my family.

alxjames · 23/02/2015 13:09

I actually found your stereotyping rather disgusting and very attention seeking.

Really no need.

TaliZorahVasNormandy · 23/02/2015 13:10

I would find it hilarious and really off putting, if he said it during mundane conversation in a sexy way.

Drive by "love you" is fine in public, but turning to something mid chat to declare it is rather sickeningly funny.

SirChenjin · 23/02/2015 13:17

My apologies for misquoting you in part there. The rest of your stereotyping was correct I believe?

MonstrousRatbag · 23/02/2015 13:23

DD does this all the time. She tells me she loves me before going out. Then when she gets back she says 'I still love you Mummy.' But then, she's only three.

Your BIL sounds attention-seeking, cutting across a conversation to make a random public declaration of love. I suppose your options are ignore, or undermine it with humour.

YoGatoradeMeBitch · 23/02/2015 13:25

SirChenjin yes you did misquote me. I'm not going to repeat myself. You seem to be itching for a bunfight. Try elsewhere....

Roussette · 23/02/2015 13:27

If it was my BIL, I would be saying "shut up you twat" I'm afraid. I love it that couples are happy together but you don't want it rammed down your throat when you are in the middle of a conversation.

alxjames · 23/02/2015 13:29

You seem to be itching for a bunfight. Try elsewhere

No I think you are.

Why stereotype? Do you want to offend people and have attention?

SirChenjin · 23/02/2015 13:30

No bunfight - just don't like any form of stereotyping. It's never helpful.

Now, I am going back to the thread which is far more interesting.

Number3cometome · 23/02/2015 13:31

OH says it to me when he is embarrassed or having a joke with me.

I don't find it cringey at all, just a joke thing he does?

No one who knows us would understand that though, so maybe you are just not privy to a private joke?

YoGatoradeMeBitch · 23/02/2015 13:31

Looking for attention...? Not me.

alxjames · 23/02/2015 13:40

That's why you felt the need to make such a sweeping generalisation?

Obviously trying your hardest to get some attention.

RitaOrange · 23/02/2015 13:42

W all have little in jokes but it would be crass to constantly do it in front of others who we know wont get the joke.
It doesn't sound like a private joke to say "God,I love you" in a turned on way < typing that makes me feel queasy>
It sounds like he is either socially unaware or something has happened and he feels the need to do this.

BrendaBlackhead · 23/02/2015 13:46

Number3: maybe you are just not privy to a private joke?

How rude to make private jokes in front of others. Nothing like being the other person awkwardly smiling knowing they're being excluded.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 23/02/2015 14:06

yy Brenda. It's the height of bad manners and really, really has nothing to do with being privy to anything. Who the hell would want to be privy that?

I wouldn't invite or be around anybody who behaved like that, urgh.

Number3cometome · 23/02/2015 14:09

BrendaBlackhead

Oh god yeah because having a private joke about love is such a crime.

Get real, people have private jokes, you can't expect to know everything about a couple's life.

People have their own quirky things, you just sound jealous to not like it.

Perhaps you are missing a bit of a private joke in your own life?

iklboo · 23/02/2015 14:20

Suddenly announce you're going on Harry Hills Stars In Their Eyes as Annie Lennox & blare out 'No More I Love Yous'

alxjames · 23/02/2015 14:24

Get real, people have private jokes, you can't expect to know everything about a couple's life.

Erm ... I think you missed the point.

Yes everyone has private jokes. Private jokes are fine.

But to do it knowingly to exclude and make people uncomfortable is just pathetic.

CaptainAnkles · 23/02/2015 14:25

I liked the Anchorman 'I love lamp' suggestion Smile

Number3cometome · 23/02/2015 14:26

So to say 'God I love you' is making people feel uncomfortable and is pathetic?

Wow. That's all I can say.