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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to tell Dh I no longer want to be SAHM to 2 month old and to be a SAHD?

283 replies

MrsDutchie · 16/02/2015 23:41

Dh is a PhD student in the final stages of submitting his research. I've been on mat leave since November and whilst I love PFB to bits, I don't want to be a SAHM much longer - it's driving me crazy. I miss my work so much I've taken on part-time consultancy work with a charity. If I go back to work, a fair amount of the money goes straight back to childcare if Dh continues with studies.

I don't get why it's not the other way round. I have the job but Dh's logic is he will eventually get the well paid job. Sod eventually - why does the fact I have vagina mean I have to stay at home and look after PFB? I have a career and interests too. He just sees her at evenings and on nice family days and I'm driving up the wall here desperate to work again.

Like I said, I love PFB but why should the fact I have boobies and gave birth mean I'm faced with this dilemma and Dh gets to waltz through guilt-free without any concerns or repercussions about how selfish he is if he goes back to work.

Any other MNers had a similar dilemma? What did you do? I'm not looking to get flamed for how selfish I am or that it was my choice to have kids. I stand where I stand on this and I want to balance both

OP posts:
bedraggledmumoftwo · 17/02/2015 11:37

Just a thought, if he would be willing to ask his parents to house you for a few months, would he be willing to ask them for money to tide you over in the short term? If they aren't broke themselves, of course. Or maybe mil would be able to come and offer free childcare for a bit? Again, you might not have room, and most women would hate it, but assuming they are proud of phd son they may be willing to help out so he can complete it?

MrsJohnLewis · 17/02/2015 12:03

I'm only at page 2 so sorry for not RTFT but YANBU OP.

Your family needs the money right now. Not a bloody PhD.

OhMrGove · 17/02/2015 12:03

I'm sorry but you cannot expect someone nearing the end of a doctorate to pack it in to work. Soul destroying.

DialsMavis · 17/02/2015 12:14

I think you are getting a hard time. Who just does a PhD? Everyone works or takes care of their children. Of course he can look after the baby. Or he can get a bar job in the evenings to bring in more £

Branleuse · 17/02/2015 12:22

get childcare for your baby. Itll cost a lot in the short term, but it will be worth it, and those sort of fees arent forever.

Many people actually lose money with childcare and working because its better than being a SAHP and losing your job/skills.

It is totally unfair of you to expect your dh to give up his PHD though. He can help with a day or two childcare when hes done it. Maybe you could negotiate working 3 or 4 days instead of full time, and then just a couple of days childcare to find

Nolim · 17/02/2015 12:23

Er.… Getting a phd is considered a full time occupation in most cases.

sherbetpips · 17/02/2015 12:30

I suppose the question is do you think he will get a well paid job once he has his PHD? Has he ever been in full time employment or is he likely to be the eternal student?
You have got this far so you have to let him finish it, get part time work in the meantime and then once he has employment you can afford the childcare.
The only other barrier you may have is your partners attitude towards SAHM. I know a few divorces that have sprung from the DH's belief that wifey would stay at home, cook dinner and look after kids, just like there mum did.

88blueshoes · 17/02/2015 12:35

YANBU. But I think the best solution would be something which allows your DH to finish his PhD as well. Giving up at this point would be soul destroying! If you can't afford childcare right now and really need the money, could you work in the evenings/weekends or whenever your DH is free, until the PhD is finished?

Then once the PhD is done your career could take priority?

OTheHugeManatee · 17/02/2015 12:41

DH managed to do a PhD while working two jobs (on top of teaching undergrads)- because he had to. Your DH needs to stop being so precious.

sonjadog · 17/02/2015 12:44

As frustrating as it is, you can't expect someone in the final 3 months of their PhD to pack it in and go get a job. It is also such a busy time that getting a job as well as finishing the PhD really isn't an option either.

I think you just have to deal with it for the next three months and then go back to work when he has submitted.

OhMrGove · 17/02/2015 12:52

I can only assume the poster suggesting the dh get a bar job in the last 3 months of his phd is either having a laugh or has never known anyone/experienced what the final year of a doctorate is like...

notquiteruralbliss · 17/02/2015 12:58

Why on earth can't you go back to work? From your post, it looks as if your salary would more than cover child care and then, once your partner gets the well paid job post PhD you will have 2 x salaries. I was already back at work when my DCs were 2 months old.

FluffyPersian · 17/02/2015 12:59

'I can only assume the poster suggesting the dh get a bar job in the last 3 months of his phd is either having a laugh or has never known anyone/experienced what the final year of a doctorate is like...'

I do. I've got a PhD in Computer Science and I worked full time for my last year... I went over my 3 years so my research grant stopped and sadly my Supervisor wasn't overly supportive when it came to giving me feedback on my thesis, so I had to re-write my entire thesis before I submitted.

I was an I.T. Consultant, commuting 4 hours a day from Reading to London (slow train... 1 hour 40 mins each way) whilst working a long day on Client site so I used my time on the train, my evenings and weekends to write up. It was the hardest thing I ever had to do, however I did it and I did it because I had no money coming in, therefore I had no choice - I wouldn't have been able to pay the rent or live, basically.

I think the OP's Husband does have a choice, and he's choosing to ignore her feelings or compromise at all.

Additionally - Having a PhD really doesn't necessarily make you more employable, not straight away in some cases (or at least in my opinion which is shared by my friends who did one the same time as me) Some employers looked at it as if I was better than them, some rejected me as I was 'too qualified' and some still focused on my A levels, even though I had done them years beforehand...

I'd be expecting him to do a minimum of 3 days a week childcare.....

Bolshybookworm · 17/02/2015 13:03

It's pretty normal for PhD students to get bar jobs when they're writing up ohmygove- lots of my friends did. How else are you supposed to pay the rent if your funding runs out? Writing up is as all-consuming as you want it to be. I've known medics to write up whilst holding down a full time clinical position ( although this is not easy).

notquiteruralbliss · 17/02/2015 13:04

a PhD is a full time job so suggestions of OPs partner getting work in a bar etc don't make sense. He is already working full time. He can however do the round the edges' child care or maybe a day or two a week child care with OP doing child are at weekends.What I don't understand is how the OP staying at home with the baby would help family finances if what she would earn would be greater than child care costs.

kitchentableagain · 17/02/2015 13:09

I wonder if you're still reading this OP, so much hostility for someone struggling as I'm sure the vast majority of us have - anyone here saying hand on heart that 8 weeks after their first child being born they were all "oh, super loving my life!" is lying. The first three months with my eldest were the longest of my life! Lack of sleep, lack of rest, lack of that-human-i-used-to-be (who had been replaced by a shit-wiping, milk-squirting, scream-hearing automaton). It's fucking hard!

On to the situation. When you say financially broke do you mean you have no extra money, even for non-essential foods like basics range biscuits, or do you mean you will not be paying your rent/bills at the end of this month? Because I think the former feels desperate while the latter IS desperate. I was pretty bloody anxious 2months post partum and they would have felt equally bad. But if you can actually continue to pay your rent and bills and eat then maybe you can be reassured that this time will pass.

The PhD thing is ridiculous IMO. I know several WOMEN who did PhD's after having kids and they wrote up entirely at weekends while their OHs (who worked full time during the week) took the babies out all day. Your husband definitely COULD be a sahd and still finish his PhD no bother, albeit in a slightly longer timescale.

What to do about this is hard though. Not liking being a sahm after 2 months doesn't mean much, it's a fucking massive shock suddenly being responsible for the complete care and wellbeing of someone else. I bet if you ask junior doctors 2 months after graduation if they enjoyed and were good at being doctors yet they'd say no, and THEY get to clock off after a shift! That is not to say your feelings today aren't valid, just that they may change massively.

Your comments about sacrifice remind me so much of myself at that stage - I felt like the me who I had been was completely gone, utterly eroded. I couldn't cook or read or shit without the baby needing something, I was shell-shocked from the change in my life (i had been the higher earner in my relationship up until giving birth too). I did feel incredibly bitter about being the woman and lumped with it all. It wasn't that he didn't join in caring (though he didn't much) it was that the buck stopped with me, always always. I was always the one expected to do or fix anything he wouldn't/couldn't/didn't. It was exhausting and felt very unfair.

I can't advise about the return to work, my relationship fell apart completely and as a single parent I would have had to put her into childcare for 49 hours a week to return to my job, and would have been slightly less well off than on benefits. So I went on benefits, eventually she got older, I picked up some flexible freelance work to do in evenings and eventually met my DH who I have two more DC's with.

You sound like you're feeling so desperate, I can't believe the judgy crap people have felt legitimate in posting! I can't tell you what to do OP. YANBU, and many many of us have felt as you do. I can't tell you how to force your DH to shoulder his share, or how to work around childcare so that your working brings the maximum benefit to your family. But I can say YA DEFINITELY NBU, whatever you end up doing will be the Right Thing for your family and, most of all, this time will pass, the person you were will re-emerge, life will not feel like this forever. Best of luck.

PetraStrorm · 17/02/2015 13:13

OP I haven't read the whole of the thread, just wanted to suggest that if you can afford it, a nanny or au pair (or a childminder - I had a brilliant childminder) are all worth considering, if you, personally, in your own opinion of what suits your family, think your baby is too young for a nursery.
And I REALLY hope that was enough of a disclaimer to avoid offending anyone about childcare choices Grin

Maiyakat · 17/02/2015 13:15

If he's sure he can finish in 3 months, could you compromise and set a date you'll go back to work in 3-4 months time? Then he could be SAHD whilst he's looking for work, and then when you're both working childcare would be more affordable (especially if you can both get childcare vouchers via work). Would also give him a push to make sure he does finish in 3 months....

Honsandrevels · 17/02/2015 13:16

The op isn't suggesting that her dh gives up his phd. Lots of phd students get a job (research, teaching etc) before they have submitted. The thing is it might take 3 months to finish, then his supervisor may suggest changes, he has to submit, prep for his viva etc. At what point will he look for a job? The op can't live on fresh air!

darkness · 17/02/2015 13:20

A PhD is not a full time job. Firstly its not a job. And secondly as it can be done in between two and seven years..obviously the workload can be rearranged to suit your circumstances. Which are, isn't eating and having a roof over our heads nice? For some people. And souls are not destroyed by walking a way from PhDs, the more you work in research the more worthless and self indulgent most of them seem.
See comments on less not more employable above.
I dontcsee why op is getting a hard time about this either, its their baby, not her baby, it can't be put on hold. Sure three months is not long to be poor in the grand scheme of things, but only if there is then an end. Someone who can't see the need for, or find the time to apply for jobs is being self indulgent especiallt when they have helped to create the problem in the first place.

SoonToBeSix · 17/02/2015 13:22

Yabu and quite selfish. Why exactly did you have a baby?

limegoldfinewine · 17/02/2015 13:23

Even if he gets a bar job, how does it meaningfully change their circumstances given that they live in London and are getting so little in benefits? Is 100 quid a week after tax really going to do anything? Also job hunting can take a ton of time and it can take 3 months to get a job! This is a waste of time. He should just finish the phD.

Nolim · 17/02/2015 13:33

Darknes:

That the lenght of study is not fix is not to make life easier for the candidate. It is because research ( and advisors) are unpredictable.

You say that reseach is worthless?? Or that people who do research are? I am not sure i follow.

UptheChimney · 17/02/2015 13:35

OP I so get where you're comig from. I found the first few months in turn exhilirating and so boring I could have eaten my own foot off, just for something to happen.

But it seems to me that that's not really the issue.

The issue is your self-centred DH.

I did my PhD while teaching university full-time. It took me a year longer than the usual time, but I was earning a f-t salary (although academic pay 20 years ago was shite).

Your DH is being self-centred, precious, and most of all, unrealistic & rather stupid about the academic job market. I don't now which sector/field he's in (humanities/STEM) but it is are to get a job as soon as you've submitted your thesis. Ditto re a post-doc. It can take a year or two of part-time/hourly paid teaching, bits of research assistant jobs & so on. Believe me, I recruit enough junior staff, and advise enough PhDs and postdocs to know this. I've been on selection panels where we've had around 100 applications for 1 post ...

Far far better for him to step up as the SAHP, and let you earn the money.

I know many women who finished PhDs as they cared for new-borns.

From where I'm sitting, your DH seems like a sexist selfish manchild, who assumes that your career will suffer. As you quite reasonably ask, "Why should it be your career that automatically takes the hit?"

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Motherhood_penalty

Strictlyison · 17/02/2015 13:53

OP, just bear with it for 4 more months. It's not that long, it will not ruin your career, your partner will have time to finish his PhD and will be able to find a better paid job. It's not a long time really, 6 months in total of not working. Try to relax a bit and find positive things to do with your baby.

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