AIBU in wanting to leave because of his drinking and size?

[ConfusedInScotland2015]

It's taken me a long time to post this. I've been on here for years and tonight yet another incident happened in my home life that makes me wonder how much longer can I put up with it. I've NC as I'm too embarrassed to use my normal name.

My DH drinks, every bloody night. It's either 4 or 6 cans of Budweiser and a bottle of wine or the same 4 or 6 cans and half to thee quarters a bottle of vodka.

Yet again tonight I'm blamed for "starting an argument" as I asked him to go to bed (as he's getting argumentative).

There's many Issues I have and I'm so sorry if I offend anyone by saying my main issue is my DH is now 26 stone. I don't find him attractive and don't want to go on holiday with him. I'm mortified he can't fit into a normal plane seat without a seat belt extender let alone sit on a beach with him. He seems oblivious to the comments people make but they really embarrass me. I'm sick of going to restaurants with him only to find myself looking for tables in the corner to hide away.

We haven't has sex in two years as I can't bear the thought of his fat engulfing my 9 stone frame.

He was always big built but never 26 stone. He was normally 17 stone but at 6'5" that wasn't bad. Honestly I make very healthy meals and have encouraged him to try every healthy eating plan going.

In short, I'm sick of his drinking, I'm fed up of him being argumentative with a drink (most nights) and I'm so embarrassed by his size.

AIBU in considering leaving him?

Have you RTFT ljwales?

Well done OP.

Milkysmum please try to find the strength and help to leave.

He has no reason to change, as you stay and put up with it, does he? Is there a reason he drinks and over eats? Is he depressed or is he comfort eating and drinking to cope with work stress or some other deeper issue? Or is he just an addictive personality type? Only you know.

But I think you leaving may be the only thing to do, it will either shock him into doing something or, I know this sounds awful but he will possibly deteriorate more, it sounds like a downward spiral if someone doesnt put the breaks on in some shape or form. Its very sad but he obviously needs some help, no-one happy drinks like a fish and eats to a 26stone weight.I think you should draw a line and say get help or I leave. And stick to it. Best of luck. As another thought, I have met and worked with so many men who do the ostrich thing re drink problems and it seems they have to reach rock bottom/lose everything before they will go get help.

wishing you and dd happiness