Elephants I'm going respond to your post in detail as it's one of the most scathing.
You don't want to teach because you want to see your kids (unlike everyone else of course, who hate theirs) nope, I just choose to see mine and they don't
You don't take a job because your husband is "protective" of your CV (what does that mean exactly, when doing NOTHING is apparently better than doing anything at all?) I HAVE A JOB, one that will look great on my CV but it's just a short term contract.
You think your kid will get into Eton when he can't even get a small scholarship for the local school I think they'd be lucky to have him.
You think your kids are the only ones in the whole world who understand quality, and that without rolling lawns etc they will simply DIE I think you don't miss what you don't know.
It's a shame, you know, because your kids sound bright and sweet. - they are
But what you're doing to them is making them think that private schooling has a value in and of itself. In other words, that EXPENSIVE things are better, just because they are. That free things that are available to everyone are less worthy, exactly because they are available to anyone. So if they can enjoy a state school where they have normal lunches without anyone playing the lute over them they must be worth less too, reduced to the level of those who don't "understand quality".
We have experience of 3 private schools over the last 10 years, the current one is the cheapest (by quite a bit) and by far the best fit for my kid/s, mainly because it's academically selective, they didn't rate the other 2 much at all although they loved the amazing climbing tree at the one close to us. Our first choice of school was a state school (superselective grammar), they just didn't make the cut. They value a selective environment, nothing to do with me - I'm actually pro mixed ability teaching (not that I've ever seen it done properly in this country).
As an aside, DD had a bad experience at her state middle school, a not very nice teacher appeared to have some sort of grudge against her. She was consequently unhappy and I think this may have affected her stance (luckily there was a fabulous TA who spoke up for DD and sent her the most lovely card when she left, so she has that nice memory). DS is having a better experience in middle school but still wants what DD has - he gets excited at her homeworks etc.
Mutters thanks for the encouragement on the work front. I was at an editorial meeting for a new project today and it was really exciting, I'm hopeful that there may be some more work once this bit is done.
Dougie
What do my friends say? Well one set thought we were bonkers for ever going private and didn't understand why we would even be interested in the grammar as they planned to take full advantage of their local state school. They changed their tune however when their DD got to Y5 and frantically embarked on tutoring for their not so local grammar.
My best friend thought that we were bonkers for even considering private ed at primary but then sent their DS private in Y2 when their local schools were reorganised.
Quite a few of my friends have DC at the non selective private school that we left and they are always complaining about something there. Another friend has her 2 in the fab prep school that I stalk :).
I'm seriously not a keeping up with the Jones' kind of person.