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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to think school assembly songs are hilarious now?

173 replies

DamFineBeaver · 06/02/2015 10:11

Infant school assemblies are like Nuremburg rallies, everyone punching the air in unison and going for their Goal.

In the juniors, they sing rousing renditions of songs about Internet Safety.

Now, even as a staunch atheist, I can see the appeal of All things Bright and Beautiful.

OP posts:

chelseabuns2013 · 07/02/2015 16:25

No, but I also laughed when the following things happened, boy slips over on newly polished floor during dance routine and starts crying, "Mary" fell over and couldn't get back up and starts crying any music/school band performance, music malfunctions any slip, trip or fall. I send other half to most things as my giggle reflex is very sensitive and can leave me in hysterics at the smallest mistake!

SellMySoulForSomeSleep · 07/02/2015 16:39

"if I had a hammer, I'd hammer in the morning. I'd hammer in the evening all over this land. I'd hammer out danger, I'd hammer out warning , I'd hammer out love to my brother and sisters all ooooovvvveeeerrrr this land. Oooo ooooo ooooo"

No one?
I'm sure it was in the blue come and praise book near the back.

dragdownthemoon · 07/02/2015 17:18

I sang the hammer song to DS just yesterday when he asked me, mum do you have a hammer. I replied, if I HAD a hammer... I'd hammer in the morning! Etc.

I even did a hammery dance.

samsswampy · 07/02/2015 17:39

I remember the hammer song too! Did anyone sing
glad that I live am i, that the sky is blue, glad for the country lanes and the fall of dew? Also thank you God for the creamy milk that I drink every day thank you too for the bright sunshine as I go out to play. My DS leaving assembly was very sad they sang no matter what.

WinkyOrSmiley · 07/02/2015 17:44

After the clouds, the rain. After the rain, the sun. This is the way of , Since the world began.

herecomesthsun · 07/02/2015 18:00

I get the point of the keep safe in the internet song. However, if I had never got to know people on the internet that I would otherwise never have met, I would never have met DH and probably would have had any kids...

samsswampy · 07/02/2015 18:01

The way of life, winky! All that we need to do, be we low or high, is to see that we grow nearer the sky

storynanny2 · 07/02/2015 18:24

Ah good memories. I've been the pianist in primaries for over 35 years and have nodded along at all your song titles, especially one of my favourites, Cauliflowers fluffy. I always used to buy one of each of the veg and fruits mentioned in the song to aid memory of the words.
I have a confession to make. After years and years and years of playing The farmer comes to scatter the seed, I only realise now reading this thread it has other connotations!
Sadly, in my supply teacher role at various schools, singing seems to be on the decline, some schools don't even have a piano now. I always make a point of singing with little ones when I am there and when I go back they always ask to sing again.

Ifyourawizardwhydouwearglasses · 07/02/2015 18:27

Does anyone remember Waves are Beating??
I'm beginning to think I dreamed it, I can remember almost all except a few lines and it is really getting to me now, doesn't seem to be anywhere on the internet. It's lovely, has a really nice tune. Here's what I can remember (but possible not all in the right order!)

Waves are beating on the shore
Crashing into foam
Seagulls squealing, wheeling high
Sailors coming home.
Boats are bobbing up and down
Safe in harbour now
Some are riding out the storm
Dipping bow on bow.

God has made the sea so vast
Oceans roaring swell
Cliffs of chalk and granite rocks
Sailors know them well.
**

Ever since the world began
People sailed the seas
Plunged across the roaring tides
Floated on the breeze
'Furl the sails and winch the sheets
Feel the salt spray fly
Know the freedom of the sea
Underneath the sky.

angielizzy1 · 07/02/2015 18:45

We used to sing who built the ark but for some reason I always thought it was who built the ark no one, no one. Never even connected the song with noahs ark till I heard it years later. No idea what I thought we were singing about with all the animals.

winewolfhowls · 07/02/2015 19:00

Oooh ds 18mths said hammer yesterday for the first time so i will have to look up the hammer song!

Theimpossiblegirl · 07/02/2015 19:01

I used to sing "Bloody Noah built the ark!" I must have thought it was a song to explain the story to idiots or something. Lucky I didn't get caught, I honestly thought they were the words for years.

SecretNutellaFix · 08/02/2015 00:43

We learned Walk in the Light, Seek Ye First, Peace Perfect Peace, Lord of All Hopefullness.

We went to a non faith school first and then transferred when I was 8 and my sister 7 to a Catholic Primary. We had Mass every Thursday- each year had all the servers/ readers/ prayer readers take a full part. Everyone got a chance, and becasue it was a small parish, the children were expected to attend on Sundays and often got pressed into service at the offertory procession.

I remember we used to sing Seek Ye First as a round.

sofatastic · 08/02/2015 01:23

The Diamond Jubilee song was pretty good, and the cheerful tuneful optomism of a couple of hundred juniors singing it brought a tear to my eye...

CountryMummy1 · 08/02/2015 05:32

When I was still in primary teaching 5 years ago we had to teach the children a god awful song with the most diabolical grammar ever!! Why!!?? It went...

"Spring has sprung, the grass is riz. I wonder where the birdies is"

Bloody awful

SeattleGraceMercyDeath · 08/02/2015 05:55

DS has 'what have you done today to make you feel proud' played as they walk into assembly as its 0905, not much I suspect...

He did also come home singing loudly 'Sing ya spanner' gentle probing revealed he was lustily recreating he song he had learnt in assembly, 'sing Hosanna'

Panzee · 08/02/2015 06:57

Toohasty your music teacher didn't write that song, unless she also writes songs for Out Of The Ark. :o

At one school I once worked at, one of the teachers always got them to sing a sad song about depressing newspaper headlines.

DrDiva · 08/02/2015 10:17

...and now I'm wondering how many of you were taught these songs by me! I got through an awful lot of schools as a music teacher in the 90s...

Enb76 · 08/02/2015 10:29

CountryMummy

It's Spring in Brooklyn or Budding Bronx.

Der Spring has Sprung
Der grass is riz
I wonder where dem boidies is
Dey say dem boids is on der wing
Ain't dat absoid?
I say dem wings is on der boid.

MamaMotherMummy · 08/02/2015 10:53

When I was at school...

Sing Hosanna to the King of Kings
at which point everyone in our class would turn round and stare at the girl called Susannah.

I was cold I was naked, were you there?
Which was of course, HILARIOUS.

Preciousbane · 08/02/2015 12:12

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BlueberryWafer · 08/02/2015 13:38

Branleuse, I can't decided that is the most disturbing or hilarious thing I've seen for a long time!

therenter · 08/02/2015 13:56

We have a good mix at our primary. He's got the whole world in his hands is one. Another one about getting your body moving "Get your feet moving to the beat, get your body moving. Stand up, jump up.
Give your friends a thumbs up! It's a brand
new day.
Just a couple that they sing.

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