to think school assembly songs are hilarious now?

[DamFineBeaver]

Infant school assemblies are like Nuremburg rallies, everyone punching the air in unison and going for their Goal.

In the juniors, they sing rousing renditions of songs about Internet Safety.

Now, even as a staunch atheist, I can see the appeal of All things Bright and Beautiful.

I like the harvest songs,

Cauliflowers fluffy and cabbages green...

Probably the broad bean song Enb76's DC have been singing

Actually, casting my mind back three decades a few years, I seem to remember a few rousing school assembly choruses of Blowin' in the Wind.

Branleuse. That video is really freaky. Unfortunately I do remember all of the words though.

Branleuse that is awesome.

How does the Internet safety song go?

I wish I could remember. It made me cry with laughter when I heard it.

If I were a fuzzy, wuzzy bear I'd thank you Lord for my fuzzy wuzzy hair! I loved that one. I remember doing the overhead projector to that song. Big job for a year 6 - none of this automatic iwb assembly programs that they use now

The deputy head in my primary school was a hippy. He looked like something from the joy of sex.
We had to sing 'blowin in the wind' 'nowhere man' the family of man' 'yellow submarine'

We had to sing 'we're going home sh shh', we're going home sh sshh'. Did anyone else sing that?
We also had to do Streets of London and Ebony and Ivory loads.

m.youtube.com/watch?v=QC2QxhIsSHA

Wasn't this one was it?

Our school assemblies are like some sort of motivational self-help meeting sometimes .

We still sing the Autumn Days one, and "Lord of the Dance" but there's a lot of We Are The Champions going on. I think some of our staff had dreams of pop-stardom at some point as there's a lot of 'rocking out' on guitars going on

My favourite is the school song that one of the teachers wrote. It makes me cringe to the extent I'm worried I might turn myself inside out.

Myleft That was my favourite song to sing in assemblies when I was in Primary School!
Didn't it also mention 'the smell of bacon as I fasten up my laces and the song the milkman sings'?
Ah, memories, memories..

Cauliflowers fluffy is a brilliant song. The broad beans are sleeping in their blankety beds...

I think a mixture is great. I've seen ten year olds in a community school singing 3 part spirituals about freedom, been moved to tears by a primary choir singing Something Inside So Strong, loved cute 3 year olds all being that Spring Chicken having a ball, and joined in with 200 juniors and their parents belting out Firework. They have great tunes, make the children want to sing, and carry decent messages.

The main issue now is that most schools don't have a pianist so the old hymns have withered and died. If Out of the Ark/ Sing Up did When a Knight Won His Spurs or The Golden Cockerel Crows in the Morning on CD/ IWB screen I am sure most primaries would also be singing those.

I have fond memories of playing the descant recorder for hymns in assembly at Junior School standing next to the lovely Mrs Lyon on piano. My favourite was the introduction to At the Name of Jesus.

So where are all these school singing halfway-decent pop songs and nice songs about vegetables?
Aren't you worried about your kids' safety on the internet? Shame on you.

- Toohasty, my DDs used to sing the one about the farmer comes and scatters his seed. Cue lots of sniggering from the parents' row in harvest assemblies - none of us could look at each other! Ah, happy memories. I'm of the Knight Won His Spurs generation. And Daisies are our Silver, though I'd quite forgotten it till you mentioned it. Did anyone sing something about remembering all the children who live in far-off lands? There was a line about, 'Where children wade in rice fields and watch the camel trains' which conjured up some very odd images for me when I sang it.

Ah, yes, just watched the link from Branleuse. I should read the whole thread before posting

Ours sing a bizarrely sinister one about 'we will get along much better if we just OBEY THE RULES...'

Then it accelerates, Cossack-dance style.

We should have Mumsnet Assemblies. Morning and evening...and a Mumsnet song.

Where IS out MN song!? It should be rousing and traditional but with a bitter edge to it.

Yy to Streets of London - made me so sad every time.

We also sang propaganda - "say no to strangers, say no, no, no, no, no!" and, randomly, Michelle by the Beatles, which featured lines on completely mangled French.

I want someone to say at the end of the MN day...

"Now come together girls....quiet! Today has been another productive Friday hasn't it? We've heard good news about an old thread thought lost...now found thanks to the hard work of the senior girls. I'd also like to mention that a new spooky thread has been started. That's something to look forward to this weekend isn't it girls!?"

I also like Allan Alhberg's Headmaster's Hymn:

When a knight won his spurs in the stories of old
He was - face the front David Briggs, what have you been told?!
With a shield on his arm and a lance in his - Hey!
Is that a ball I can see-ee? Put it a-way

No charger have I, and - no talking back there!
You're supposed to be singing, not combing your hair!
Though back into storyland giants have - Roy!
This isn't the playground, stop pushing that boy.

Let faith be my shield and - who's eating sweets here?
I'm ashamed of you Marion, it's not like you, dear.
And let me set free with - Please stop that Paul King
This is no place for whistlers, we'd rather you sing!

Are you sure you're not hallucinating Bird? Sounds terrifying.

Mind you, I think the idea of jet planes meeting in the air to be refuelled sounds equally terrifying. What's it even supposed to mean? I wouldn't be at all thankful if I was on a jet plane that met with another in the air