to ask how on earth you manage to work when you have kids?

[whyareallthegoodnicknamestaken]

Currently just having a look at whats out there in terms of work as i have taken time out to have dc's so have been a SAHM for the past 6 years.
Everyone wants flexible working hours, zero hours contracts, People willing to work weekends..
Dh is away for work quite a lot and works odd hours, I have no one to drop off or pick up dc's from school. Paying for breakfast club and after school club every day isn't cheap..
How on earth do people juggle it? Genuine question. I have no idea how I'm ever going to b a able to get a job.

School clubs, and dh being a co-parent... Equal domestic load and he collects from school on a Friday..

I worked night shift for 10 years and when ds3 was born changed to days and a childminder until he was 3. He then went to pre school with wrap round care and then school with wrap round 8am-6pm.

I worked 9-3 Mon-Fri and we covered school hols with leave.
Also PGL twice a year which they loved so we could get a fortnight off all together later for our family holiday.
Now they are grown up I still get stupidly excited when I book leave just for the hell of it

I work pt, but don't think I would even manage to do that if I didn't have extended family living nearby, who are always happy to step in when there's time off school for holidays, sickness, etc.

I do really admire people who manage to work without that support network and I don't know how they do it.

I worked nights and weekends in a call centre.

Holidays were tough when on nightshift with 3 DC snd limited opportunity to sleep. But it paid bills for a few years.

Am ft now but work flexi. Much better job back
In my old profession. But still it's a fine balance. Luckily my employer is understanding.

Like carlywurly said, I'm in a similar situation. Ex hasn't seen my son since he was 5 weeks old so been a lone parent all along. I went back to work when DS was 10months old. I do a 4 day week with Wednesdays 'off work'. I use this day to catch up on home errands, shopping etc tho I must admit housework never really ends.

Ds will be 2 in middle if feb, currently he goes to preschool next to my place of work for 4 whole days a week. Work is a 45min commute by car, i leave house by 8 and come home after 6. It's tough, it's expensive, it's exhausting!

I have a new partner now and we have discussed living together but we are financially better off living apart for the time being.

It's hard, I seem to have no life other than being at work or being home doing chores, cooking, etc. I get envious of people who have that support from having a partner around and will probs get flamed for saying that.

But I do know that having 100% sole responsibility of the parenting and working near f/t IS doable. I am chuffing proud of myself for doing it all on my own even tho it is a killer, both mentally and physically.

When ds starts school I will probs work 5 days a week reduced hours if the powers that be will let me so I can get home for about half 4/5 ish. Dunno what I'm gonna do about school finishing at about 3pm but I will burn that bridge when I get to it .

To my mind, it was worth going back to work instead of being a sahm just for my own sanity.

It can be done if employers and employees are willing to be accommodating

I'm really interested to know how people cope during school holidays. We're managing so far (DD1 in reception) with a combination of an after school nanny who will do some full days during school holidays and some family.

BUT there's no way the nanny will be in London over summer (she's a student) and my parents will be looking after my brothers child 2 days per week from July so that's them out. All clubs I've seen are sort of 10-3 type hours and I usually leave the house before 8 and not back until 6. I'm honestly thinking I'll need to quit my job which I absolutely do not want to do Yes it's the shared responsibility of me and DH but that of itself won't solve the problem and he earns way more than me.

I'm starting to have sleepless nights about it.

Dh can be gone for months at a time so it's not really that he won't do it, he can't. When he is home he works long hours so it will be me who does most of the school runs. School job would be ideal for me really if I can afford to put dc's in breakfast and after school clubs. Will look into it.

dh works 9 to 5 from home or in another city which means leaving at 7.30 and returning at 6.30. i am retraining so in uni an hour away or doing long shifts and odd hours. childcare is based around his hours because mine are so irregular. so either he drops them at school and they go to a cm after until 5 or they gp to the cm before school at 7.30 and have tea there after and get picked up at 6.30. It is kind of shit bit once i qualify and ds2 starts school we should be able to reduce it to 3 days a week.

herethereandevwrywhere

Fret not, if you look on your council website there should be a section on summer holiday play schemes which run all day. They're usually out closer to the holidays but may be different for your borough.

I work 9-3 x 3 days pw from home. Just have to cover school holidays, which is fine with some sports clubs and leave.

herethere You need to be creative I think.

Can you and your H split your leave? So maybe you can use a week, he can use a week?

There will also be holiday clubs (usually the school breakfast / after school clubs) who do longer hours (usually 8-6pm). Obviously more expensive though.

And then do you have any facility to work from home? My H can occasionally and he has done half a day from home around the 10-3 scenario (i.e. dropped off, then came home to do 4 hours or so, then collected at 3). Obviously means he only uses half a day's leave rather than a full day and his leaves goes further.

Do you know any of the other parents of your child's friends? Could you swap a couple of days - i.e. you have one of his friends for a day (so the friend's parents can work) and then they have your child for a day? If the family can do a day here and there, you might find you can muddle through?

I'm a nurse and work 30 hours over 3 days. We have a good childminder and DH's work are flexible - he leaves early so he can collect the kids at 5pm on days when I am working. We do get some childcare tax credits which helps with the cost but purely financially it is not really worth me working - I do it for the long term benefits (career, pension etc). I have 2 under 3 so both in full time childcare.

I work nights and me and DP use annual leave between us for summer hols
GP's fill in the blanks

also, we both use annual leave to cover emergencies, illness etc

We have 3 DC and both work full-time with a longish commute (DH about 45 mins, me an hour and 10 minutes). We have a nanny (on reduced hours now DC all at school) but it's still all held together with chewing gum and string - we work shifts (one starts early, one late) so there's a parent there for breakfast and dinner, and each try to work at home a day a week (we are actually working and on the clock though, so no wandering off). I am lucky to have a supportive boss and a lovely and reliable nanny but it's hard work.

I've worked at the same school as my children - only difference is now I have to do inset days but they're all old enough to be left home alone now...

I married a teacher so he covers almost all holidays.
A mix of (thankfully free) breakfast club, school activity clubs ( again thankfully free) and paid after school club.
Our eldest is now thankfully old enough to help with occasional pick ups.
Everyone has to pitch in with chores.
Thankfully I have some flexibilitybwith start finish times and can work from home if I need.
And I'm permanently tired. :(

I work 3 days a week, Dh full time. We pay for childcare - breakfast and after school club and nursery - on days I work. You're right, it's not cheap. We take annual leave to cover school holidays. We v rarely take leave together - how much leave we have in hand for this depends on strikes, snow days and child's illness. No family for 200 miles.

I work 0.6 in a school. Ds goes to nursery 2days. Dh drops off and I pick up. Dh has one day off in the week (my 3rd day at work) and one at the weekend.

I get most holidays off and grandparents top up the extra.

DH is self employed so has flexibility, he works betwwen drop off/pick up and evenings/weekends as and when necessary. Comes at a price though and affects his earning potential significantly.

The breakfast and after-school clubs would generally be cheaper than a CM wouldn't they? Also most CM's will not do school pickups. Paying for childcare is a fact of life, you are not going to generally get people champing at the bit to look after your kids, day in and day out, for free unless you have a particularly enthusiastic unemployed relative nearby. Grandparents are often still working themselves or like to travel etc.

Thanks for all the ideas I'll give them further thought.

DD actually has 9 weeks off in the summer (private school, I know, we bring it on ourselves etc). so no way DH and I could do it on our own annual leave. We're able to pay for childcare so cost isn't an issue but finding someone to cover the days we need (I'm pt) and just for the summer - well it's a headache.

I manage by throwing money at the problem three days then mother in law 2 days per week. Plus getting husband to do pick up or drop off sometimes. But he has a long commute.

It isn't easy at all, but you get ultra organised and b most of the time it works ok.

I also don't hesitate to take leave if my child is ill. I just accept this will happen and forego the extra few days leave.