To raise my eyebrow at DD's school 'punishment'?

[chaosagain]

DD is 5 and in year 1. She had to miss 10 minutes of her morning playtime today after getting a yellow card yesterday and then doing the same thing again shortly afterwards. Her offence: reading a book when she was being asked to do something else/tidy up.

I get that she needs to learn to listen and I also get that it can be important that we (are seen) to support school decisions to her.. but REALLY? Sitting out of playtime is a big deal to her and the first time she's not been on the 'green card' for her behaviour this year. She was going to have this 'time out' with 2 other boys who each had 5 mins for fighting. She was really worried about it this morning, trying to find a way to not go to school etc.

She and I talked about how you just have to face things that are a little bit worrying and understand that there are consequences to your behaviour. The teacher was asking you to do things and you didn't do them. She told me that the book she was reading was just so good that she didn't hear the teacher. I get frustrated by this complete absorption of hers at home, but also recognise that she just doesn't hear me unless I go and make physical contact by touching her hand, shoulder etc.

I don't think this is worth taking up with the school and we should probably help her chalk it up to life experience but I keep thinking: 'can it be right to discipline a child (at 5) for getting lost in a book/for READING?!'

Bit of a coincidence it was tidying up time? Bless her, she sounds lovely. But I think

yabu, if you reinforce teachers message then maybe it won't happen again. That said I'm not convinced it works that well.

As she's been given another one I would be asking to speak to the teacher to find out what the problem is tbh. My dd is one to play the system and if she enjoyed the experience may well get a few more

I was going to mention what feckitall said (APD). My DH has this; his hearing is perfectly fine but he doesn't hear you straight away and you can call him numerous times before he realises. There's a delay, so although he can eventually say word for word what you've said, it takes him a while to process it. It runs in his family. DD doesn't seem affected by it but if our other child ends up having it I would not be impressed by her being punished for it. DH never had an official diagnosis but managed to get through school fine.; he wasn't punished for it as it was obvious that it wasn't something he could help.

Oh and I often have to physically touch him before he processes that I've been talking to him.

Haven't RTFT but I wanted to say that I'm exactly like your daughter and, despite being bright at school, always got into trouble for "ignoring" the teacher when in honesty I'd never heard the instruction in the first place.

As an adult I was diagnosed with auditory processing disorder meaning that, when I'm absorbed in a task, my brain "turns off" external distractions such as noise and movement so unless someone literally waves in front of my face, or touches me in some way, I don't hear them. I also struggle slightly in group conversations where there are lots of people talking at once (or listening to someone if tv is on in the background for example) but it doesn't have a major impact on my life, other than having to make colleagues aware of HOW to get my attention.

I am with hack, totally by the amount of people who think a five year old should be punished for not following instruction immediately! Really feel for you chaos. My little sister was always away with the fairies and teachers were always on at her about it. She was the sweetest kid in the world and my mum always backed her up. She is a beautiful and successful adult now but she still remembers those teachers bullying her

' people who think a five year old should be punished for not following instruction immediately!'

Neither you or OP know if that's what actually happened.

Poor little mite - she is 5 and she was engrossed in a book and did not hear the teacher. I am old and if I am engrossed in a book I do not hear anyone or anything. I did not hear or feel the earthquake round here last night. Think the supply teacher has been a bit harsh (yes I was a teacher) for 5 year olds.

But the poor little mite doesn't care and is looking forward to her next punishment, according to the OP.

OP has confirmed her DD did hear the instruction to come and doaths but chose to ignore it as she wanted to finish her writing. This is quite different to not hearing and is basically deciding not to do what the teacher is saying. That puts things into a totally different category and the teacher is tight to give her those yellow cards.