To have an allergic reaction to this letter from school - is it misguided?

[Somethingtodo]

I am fully supportive of a uniform policy and enforcing it - but fond the language below offensive for some reason - like to girls are to blame for sexual predators....how should I respond - want to make a point in a reasonable rational way...

Dear Parent/Guardian,
Urgent: Appropriate Uniform Standards
Unfortunately, I am forced to write to you again to request that you support our drive for every student to
attend school appropriately dressed. We must ask you to review the uniform your child has to ensure, for
instance, that skirts are of the appropriate length of decency. The school policy has always been that the
skirt needs to be knee length but some of our female students are not dressed appropriately with a normal
and reasonable standard of modesty. This is unacceptable and a safeguarding concern as some are
indecently placed halfway up the thigh. From next Monday 26th January 2015 I will strictly enforce this
basic expectation and any student wearing a skirt at an inappropriate length above their knee will be
issued with a serious sanction for flouting school expectations. I appreciate your full support in this as we
are work together to keep students safe.

Well it was t appropriate to have their arse hanging out in school leaning over a workbench while sawing! I found it much easier in schools where skirts were not allowed full stop. But when there are girls with their tights hanging lower around the crotch than their actual skirt it is a problem! As far as I can see it is no problem that letter and think too much of a fuss is being made, it schools that have overlooked the problem for so long which has made it worse! and to be honest I would not let my daughter go to school in an inappropriate skirt. If she decided to roll it up and I found out and she got into trouble I would be disappointed in her and explain the purpose of school uniform and when she is at an age of going out to work then it would be inappropriate and not professional

If some one is going to abuse/rape a school girl then 4-6 inches will make fuck all difference.

Safeguarding issues is bs.

Uniform policy is fine.

Good for you OP. Please let us know what the response is.

Newly, as another poster has said, I'm glad you're not teaching anymore, as I find your attitude deplorable.

No one on this thread is advocating that our girls should go to school wearing very short skirts - everyone understands that "appropriate" dress code that includes skirt length should be enforced. Personally, I’m quite conservative about this and hate styles on young girls that are all about displaying maximum flesh.

However, what most of us object to is the connection between a skirt length and safety, as if the wearing a miniskirt is an invitation to assault. The fact that “there are often visitors to the school and you don’t know who they are!” is irrelevant to the skirt length issue. If someone visits a school with bad intentions, that in itself is the safeguarding issue, not the idea that the person may have glimpsed a bit too much thigh.

And as a product design teacher, you might have been advocating a fit-for-purpose uniform that was not going to get in the way of sawing or any part of the curriculum.

It's not up to the head or the governing body to tell me what is appropriate or not.
However, it is up to them to specify that the school uniform requires a knee length skirt and that if my dd doesn't adhere to the school uniform I will be asked to attend school to collect her and drop her back in the prescribed school uniform, every single day until she complies with school rules.

(I DO wish dd would stop interpreting her school's 'black shoes with heels no more than 2.5cms' as including her DMs. It's getting boring now.)

Newlywed, good luck with that! I've explained to all 4 of my DDs that short skirts are not smart and not suitable for work or school, that some narrow minded people might regard them as less intelligent and sensible in short skirts, that they run the risk of displaying underwear to all and sundry when climbing upstairs or kneeling on stools in science or tech, which is neither a good look not reflects well on their self worth. I've told them they're more flattering when not knicker skimming. I've told them they will be warmer. I've told them if they roll them up to obscene lengths I will ground them/deduct pocket money/get a stapler and attach the damn skirt to their kneecaps. They still roll them up, because their friends do.

I support the school in having a uniform (in the true sense of the word - ie all the same) length. I wouldn't necessarily expect this to be below the knee. A couple of inches above is fine. If they ALL have them that length, there is no incentive to roll them higher to fit in.

I would absolutely categorically NOT support a letter which described them as immodest or a safety concern. The amount of leg on display should not cause someone to be so distracted/excited that they pose a risk in a classroom setting. Rapists are rapists regardless of the outfit worn.

I agree with the trousers comments.

They used to have an issue with buttock skimming skirts at DS1's secondary school. They tried various sanctions such as sending the girls home to change, putting the girls in to isolation for the day etc. etc. After very little success for a number of years, a new HT came to the school & within days the uniform requirements had been changed to either a knee-length skirt OR trousers for girls.

It solved the problem almost overnight. Almost everyone wore trousers and looked so much smarter to boot.

DS2 goes to a different secondary school. They do not allow girls to wear trousers and do still seem to have a large amount of buttock skimming skirts being worn. They also seem to allow skin tight white blouses unbuttoned to show cleavage . Not quite sure how they fit with the uniform requirements either TBH. Surely uniform should make a child look like they belong to a certain school, not as though they are off to a St Trinian's themed hen do.

But to return to the actual OP - no, the tone of that letter is wrong. Although the general point being made is valid.

DSs school issues uniform guidance every half term and includes pictures of appropriate/acceptable clothing alongside pictures of inappropriate clothing with a cross by it. But they state that this is the uniform, you chose to wear it by choosing our school and you will be punished if you do not wear it as described. Never has there been mention of safeguarding issues.

It does make me laugh though when I see girls wearing these short skirts standing outside school waiting to be collected. They are constantly tugging at them to pull them down and cover their legs. If they don't feel comfortable in them, why wear them

Personally I think that a head with such a warped idea about where the responsibility lies for unwanted sexual attention is a fucking safe guarding issue.

Yanbu op. It's disturbing language.

Relieved to hear you're not teaching anymore Newly.

Good letter.

I'd be interested to hear exactly how short skirts are a safeguarding issue.

Incredible to hear that instead of teaching children to dress appropriately for the job in hand or for the workplace, they have focussed on modesty for the girls?

Is the head male or female? (just out of interest)

titchy I was being tongue in cheek. I just forgot my emoji

I'm guessing this must be a girls' school OP?
Otherwise I'd be asking, where is the letter about boys wearing their trousers with the waistband at top-of-thigh level and the crotch down by their knees?

I hate school uniforms with passion. If kids could wear normal clothes to school, it would save lots of meaningless hassle.

Is this a C of E school - just wondering?
Personally I prefer knee length or longer skirts. But the girls around here, from a variety of schools, are required to wear mini skirts. At my DD's last school they wore very short mini dresses. A sunburn hazard as well as anything else. The girls then insisted on wearing their games uniform shorts under their dresses, as apparently the boys looked up their dresses on the stairs.

YANBU about the letter but you might want to take a look at your thread title as you are so keen on people using appropriate phrases for the situation.

"an allergic reaction to this letter" Seriously? WTF?

Mixed school not church - bog standard comp - new head replacing a v successful head who was there for 25 yrs.

Balloon - massive apologies if I have unwittingly offended any allergy sufferers.

I am ancient, and was at school in the 60's. Skirts were not allowed to be more than 4" above the knee. (We did the rolling the waistband thing as well, outside school)

Part of the uniform was black stockings. I travelled by train to school and back. I was naive. It was not uncommon for me or my friends to be accosted by weirdos, or flashed, on the train. Our uniform fed some people's fantasies, I reckon, so I can sort of see their point re the safeguarding.

I'm not sure about requiring everyone to wear trousers. It's giving in to the people who think that girls are indecent if they don't completely cover up. Have a school uniform which has a choice of trousers and skirts, with skirts long enough that boys can't look up them when following a girl upstairs. It does get a bit silly when the school requires a uniform so short that the girls are not comfortable with it.

where is the letter about boys wearing their trousers with the waistband at top-of-thigh level and the crotch down by their knees?

I very very rarely see the local boys dressed like that. However, approximately 95% of the girls are wearing skirts that are far too short for school. Inappropriate dress seems to be largely a female issue - I've no idea why. By inappropriate I mean inappropriate for the environment.

If kids could wear normal clothes to school, it would save lots of meaningless hassle.

The girls would most likely all be wearing a variety of styles of skirt. All still too short for school. Or possibly very short shorts.

In the area I use to work we did have problems with someone taking photos especially of girls with shorter skirts on and using angles to capture the shots.

Well you asked a question I gave my opinion!

If kids wore there own clothes it would cause other different issues, who has the latest fashionable top etc! Non uniform days are bad Enough!

I'm glad I'm not teaching now! I went into teaching as I wanted to teach product design! Not to have to worry about what kids are wearing to school and all the other crap teacher have to worry about! I stand by removing those students from my class! Especially while they were using tools they had one hand on their bum trying to cover themselves up rather than concentrating on the sharp tool they were using! Many parents forget that there are classes students do where they are not always sat down at a desk! Drama, product design, textiles food tech art etc! I would have to remove them from the class so they could go get pe kit or go to lost property to get some shorts on! Eventually they got the picture and at least when they came to the workshop they would bring shorts or wear trousers that day!
Yeah students roll skirts up! At least those that roll skirts up they could then roll skirts down again! But what about the ones who wear actual mini skirts to school that cannot be rolled down which at the school I had this problem which at this school was about 90%

So what do they wear for PE?

Newly, chill on the exclamation points. Please. Not every sentence has to end thus!

The girls at my DC's school wear their skirts thigh length but they have to wear black tights with them, which looks a lot less trashy I think.