To ask what the hell is up with people judging children's names?!

[WonderingWillow]

Just that, really. When my DS was born, we gave him a classic first name and a middle name we really loved but was a little more unusual.

My parents came to meet DS, and when they asked his name, my mum sniggered and barely covered her laugh, and said "well, we like the FIRST name, but NOT the middle name!!" And my dad just sat there sneering.
When we saw them just before Christmas, my mum said over a cup of tea "so is his middle name still X? God, did you actually put it on the birth certificate?!" He is 4 now!

Also, I've a friend whose second daughter has a really lovely, but unusual name. It sounds gorgeous, but she had family actually say to her "please don't call your DD that name" when she was PREGNANT.

what the hell? I would never have the bare faced cheek to say that to anyone, and would expect to be given a damn good ignoring for a while!

What gives people the right? Why are people so rude? AIBU to think that if you don't like a baby's name when the parent tells you, you nod and smile and compliment the new parent on their choice anyway and then keep your opinions to yourself?

I have two very pregnant friends, one likes very classic names and gets a much 'bit boring', 'meh', etc. People will always have their own opinion and some will comment. One person nearly ended up being called a word that would have had her with the mick ripped out of her when he parents returned to the UK. Luckily, someone explained the UK connotations and they changed it.

Rude to comment after the baby is born, but before...up to them, in the case above it really helped.

My best friend just goes quiet and says nothing, diverts the question shortly after if she doesn't like. She may as well just saw because we all know now!

*just say even. I'd probably do as my best friend does though it will probably give me away in time!

Children definitely make fun of names in the playground. All my children have 'boring' names yet two of them have been teased.
My eldest son is Thomas and he was made fun of because of his name, as was my daughter, Stephanie.
I presume more unusual names would be easier to make fun of.....

About halfway through so far ,

One lady I knew called her daughter Calypso. Go for it, love

Calypso is lovely. Aside from seducing Odysseus there's a character in The Camomile Lawn, played in the adaptation by Jennifer Ehle, called Calypso.

Some one mentioned "Tallulah" what's wrong with that?

One of my favourites was "Frances" and "Francis" for siblings.

And I've got to the end.

with Alfie (on birth certificate he is Alfred to give him options

I don't understand why the parents of little Harrys, Beths, Peggys don't do that.

Tallulah makes me think of Tallulah Bankhead.

Mercedes is a lovely name but outwith a Hispanic background probably a no.

Re comment about Celtic/Gaelic names, they are usually big favourites on MN.
Oh and to answer the question it is rude. You can't say anything before the name is registered unless it's going to be a really unfortunate acronym / really weird pronunciation which shows they've only seen the name in print/ really weird phonetic spelling of a name they've never seen in print. And if it's registered you can't say anything at all.

It's not ok to be rude. I just smile and nod even if I'm privately

Oliver/Ollie isn't remotely unusual. I very nearly called my DS Oliver and he's 22. He knows several Olivers of his own age.

I had an Oliver in my class at school and I'm 48. Now that was unusual. Especially as he had a twin called Ernest.

The other child was called malaria

I don't believe that. It's one of those 'my aunt's neighbour's cousin met a baby called Chlamydia' stories.

I must admit, when I liked Oliver for DS1 it was pretty unusual and we didn't have the internet to check out the popularity of other names then. If it was your first baby you had no way of knowing whether the name you liked was going to be common/popular or not, you just had to take a leap of faith and hope there weren't too many others around. I didn't plump for Oliver in the end, changed my mind at the last minute. But I met another baby Oliver at my post natal class, and my Ds's best friend now (also 22) is called Oliver and he had a couple at school with him too, so it turned out to be far more popular than I had realised.

What i don't understand is that yooneek names are known, by any employment analysis ever, to be a hindrance to getting to an interview.

Now, if you don't know your Calypsos from your Bailyee-Maes then I suppose that is moot.

My favourite is a very stylish MC friend who called her DD1 Georgia and then DD2 Marnie. Say them together and, let's just say, she isn't laughing.

I get a bit wound up on here when I see parents boasting that their DC's name is "unusual" or "there were only 2 of them born that year"

As someone with an unusual name, it can be a real curse not a blessing. Kids are cruel (so are adults). I sometimes loathe introducing myself as I know a look will flitter across people's faces or I'll be asked to repeat myself.

OP, your mother sounds like a bitch tbh. I think she was very rude and YANBU.

But some people are rude, and comment unneccessarily and are utter twunts.

We named our DS a fairly common name. (Top 10 of his year) When we told one set of friends they actually sniggered and said 'Oh we assumed you would go for something a bit pretentious'.

I was floored, as I have never thought of us as pretentious types, and really who SAYS that??!!

We have had lots of 'boring' comments too.

Greataunt. Chlamydia is most certainly a name I worked with a poor woman called this, she used the nn Claire.

Unusual names are fine, names that will result in sniggers forever are thoughtless of parents and pre-birth should be queried.

I think a lot of people do judge but mostly say nothing. But then laugh about it later.

DCs have enough to deal with in school without being saddled with ridiculous or misspelt names that can lead to teasing/bullying.

I know a little girl called Grateful.

I believe her parents are big Jerry Garcia fans, but still...

She calls herself Grace.

I think you'll find that most people do silently judge outlandish names. It's a normal reaction to parents expressing their individuality at their child's lifelong expense.

at Grateful. Grace is the best you could make of the situation.

...we didn't have the internet to check out the popularity of other names then. If it was your first baby you had no way of knowing whether the name you liked was going to be common/popular or not, you just had to take a leap of faith and hope there weren't too many others around.

I can honestly say this didn't bother me at all. As it happened, in spite of my children's names being amongst the most popular English names ever used (over many centuries, and still in the top 20 now, I think) my daughter went right through school without ever having another girl with the same name in her class. My son had one, at secondary school. (This was late 90s/early to mid 00s.)

This was just chance, though. The names that did appear on the register more than once were the newly fashionable ones - either recently coined or re-discovered - Josh, Jordan, Jack, Jake, Alex, Oscar, Elliott, Joe, Harry, Abigail, Hannah, Sophie, Amy, Alice, Emma, Emily, Courtney, Madeleine, for example. All of those would have been unusual or unknown in the 60s and 70s - in my circles, anyway.

I love unusual names! It's nice that some parents put thought into things rather than just popping "Mae" at the end of everything FFS.

I love Yael for a girl or Rex for a boy. I did want to call my first son Farroukh after Freddie Mercury but my husband point blank refused!

I also love traditional names like David and Catherine, to me there's nothing worse than a trendy name, I know that's really judgemental and i would never say it to someone's face.

CornChips, we had that comment from a friend when I was pregnant. I told her some of the names we were considering and she said "don't choose x name, it sounds really hipster and try-hard" which was hilarious considering she is a grown adult living off her parents "finding herself" and refuses to go anywhere "mainstream". When DD was born she said "is it just like having a doll?"
After a while I just stopped talking about names when I was pregnant.

I know a little Silver Chippy. I think it makes quite a pretty name, and no one bats an eyelid at Goldie.

I usually see a name somewhere in a book where I love the character but I read a lot of middle eastern graphic novels so do get a bit carried away with the silly names, I don't like invented names with silly Spellings that aren't even words.

My son has a very traditional name and my next child probably will aswell but I do like the unusual names a lot. As for being bullied for having a weird name, my name was in the top ten most popular name every year for nearly THIRTY YEARS and I still got called scabby, crabby, flabby, shabby ect every day because it rhymed with my name so as for that, fuck it. Kids are cruel regardless of your name.

I am currently 41 weeks pregnant (hurry up baby!!)

My husband and I have really been round the houses with names (turns out we have very different tastes!), and I think we now have a shortlist and will decide on the name when we finally meet our baby. We didn't find out the sex of the baby in advance.

We've kept our shortlist largely to ourselves, but the other day I made the mistake of telling a good friend that one of the names on our girl shortlist is Lois. I love it. It goes really well with our surname, it isn't hugely common here, and yet it isn't completely off the wall either.

My friend laughed and said "oh my god, I'm sorry but no, all I think of is Family Guy when I hear that name. You can't call her that!!" I was gutted!! I feel like she's totally ruined it for me now. I don't even like Family Guy!! Honestly dead annoyed (and surprised) by her rudeness, I didn't actually ask for her opinion...