Not to want to buy dd (9) crop tops

[BigBirthdayGloom]

Dd is 9 and not developing at all visibly puberty wise. She said today that she wants to wear "bras" because lots of the girls in her class were. I explained that I would take her bra shopping the minute we needed to but that we didn't need to yet. On more discussion, it turns out the other girls are wearing crop tops rather than bras (did think it was a bit strange!). Dd doesn't even wear vests-hasn't done since she was a baby.

I looked online at crop tops and they look so bra like. Honestly, I can't see the point. She doesn't need support, she isn't cold.

Would I be mean to say no? Or is fitting in that important that I just give on this one? After all, it isn't going to hurt-just make me feel she looks more grown up than she needs to,

At her wedding!!! HSSM that's just cruel.

Endler i was concerned about Tampons too but my dd was so heavy and hated towels so I let her try at 12. Tiny ones really and she was fine. She can swim etc so she was delighted.

john

My 6 year old daughter sometimes wears them around the house under clothes simply because she likes them.

*gasp

She has no need for them at all but I see it as no different than he wearing a fairy dress or whatever she is trying to be at any given moment.

It's just a short vest.

I bought DD the little starter pack from Lilets too. I also bought her some of the teen tampons, but so far she's not been keen to use them. Actually, I think we bought every item we could lay our hands on in Sainsbury's

I've always hated towels, and felt tampons made the whole thing less horrible, but so far she's refused. I think she's a bit scared of them

HSMM I like her style!

raa raa skirts, puff ball dresses and fergie bows! Sweet lord takes me back!!

Can I jump in and ask something please?

For girls that have brothers, what have you told their brothers and how have the girls been about it?

I ask because DD is Y3 and DS is Y5 and I've told them both the brief basics of periods. As it happens DD knew first and then a few months later the girls at DS school were going to have 'the nurse visit' so I had a chat with him in advance. Even including the importance of supplying chocolate.

DD heard me talking to DS and got REALLY upset that I was telling him about this, because its personal 'because one day it will happen to me'.

I pointed out I had told him because half the people in the world have periods - I didn't tell him anything about her personally. And for him to be a kind boy and man, he needs to be understanding towards his female friends. DD bawled that 'he should just keep to his OWWWNNNN KIIINNNNDD'.

This is normal, right?

No one has really mentioned it since - not that its taboo it just hasn't cropped up in conversation.

HSMM noooooooo! Your DD is a big mean!

Waiting I only have a boy so not sure about the sibling dynamic, but of course I'll be telling him about periods! Otherwise how will he know? Can't bear the thought of him carrying some playground misinformation through to his grown-up life then freaking out at the first sign of a period...

We are due to move offices soon so I'm in the process of going through all the crap I've accumulated over the last 8 years.
I opened this box file and out slipped a photo of DD age 6 months with her big baby eyes and chubby cheeks and her 2 tiny bottom teeth showing and her podgy hands and now I'm talking about my baby in the context of bras and periods...

< breaks off crying while slipping through my fingers plays on a continuous loop in the background>

we quite often chat in the car so if we talk about periods ds (8) is in the car at the same time and will hear/join in the conversation. DD can be a bit embarrassed but hasn't reacted like your dd Waiting

Bless, my dds are 9 and 1O years younger than their brothers.

When dd1 aged 11 started and had tummy pains ds1 said 'is it girly ache or guts ache?' Nicely put.

Dd said girly ache and he gave her a huge cuddle and ds 2 made her pancakes

Andy stop stop!

waiting imagine she's a bit more scared than embarrassed and just doesn't want to think about it.

When you think about it they do sound scary. Sure she will be fine

Just gave them to dd who was delighted. Now I'm having a stupid wobble because "lots of girls" turns out to be three or four and I'm worried I'll be the one causing slipping through my fingers to be on loop in all the other mothers' heads and they'll be cursing me for making them confront their babies growing up...

You did what was right for your dd. others will do the same.

It's just some fabric, your dd will be feeling however she is about growing up with or without it. Only now one step, one conversation will be a little bit easier for her and she will know she can come to you about it.

I am going to have to buy some for my 8 year old daughter as boys and girls still get changed together for p.e and she has started developing

As I've just said on another thread, my 8yo DD has some scars on her chest so she has a couple of crop tops she can wear if she feels like it.

My 9.5 year old dd has just got some this week. Before that she just had strappy vests but apparently all the other girls in the class have these crop tops, so she had to have some.