To be late for parents evening

[42bunnytails]

DD2 (Y9) has made an appointment with her German teacher.

She hates him, she's absolutely useless at German, gets put in detention and has made no progress in three years.

She's a straight A student at everything else

She's done it purely to see if I can keep a straight face, when she knows I think he's an idiot too.

It's not fair, she knows I had a fit of the giggles watching one of her class just wander off mid bollocking, leaving her parents to hear the end of it.

To make it worse you can see the French teacher trying not to giggle too

Great summary echt

Despite a pretty universal verdict along those lines the OP just doesn't get it

It's not fair, she knows I had a fit of the giggles watching one of her class just wander off mid bollocking, leaving her parents to hear the end of it
Not read all the pages as it's 1am and I need to go to bed- but how old are you - 10?!
Why would you get a fit of the giggles at a kid wandering off 'mid bollocking?'
No wonder she's been put in detentions and made no progress (your words) if that's the attitude you're sending out!

I am not entirely sure why I am wading into this, late hour induced insanity, perhaps, but I feel compelled...

I have a 16 yo DS, and we discuss school on a regular basis. We talk about the teachers who made a difference, the ones who frustrated us, the subjects we enjoyed and excelled at, and the ones we struggled with.

I have had differences with one of his teachers (Y9 maths) but would never, never allow DS to be disrespectful, openly at school or at home.

And furthermore, even if I felt that the teacher in question was a blithering idiot, I would never share that opinion with my child. It is my responsibility to teach him how to deal with authority figures who frustrate and irritate him, not to ridicule and undermine them.

Detention is not, nor should ever be, a badge of honour. You are teaching your child lessons that will prove very detrimental in the long run.

It is this inane desire to be a child's friend instead of a parent that is blurring the lines of authority and creating ridiculous degrees of inappropriate familiarity (or disdain) for those who used to be accorded respect based upon position.

Your child has enough friends, how about growing up and being a parent, instead? They will thank you when the world of employment comes knocking. You'll thank yourself when if they finally grow up enough to become independent and functional adults, despite the sabotage you have done this far.

DD1 could have given a better reasoned argument than me for why her TA should go aged 10.

Really? A ten year old? I don't care how bright they are ten year olds can't usually reason better than grown adults. Either you are mistaken or not very bright.

DD2 could have got her Y2 teacher a pay rise at 7
Fortunately you are definitely mistaken here. But can't you see how dangerous this attitude is? Even perceiving that a 7 year old has this much power over a professionals life is scary. OP would you like your salary hinging on the opinion of a 7 year old??? Ffs

People with blank spots for languages do not become fluent in their native language

What on earth? Of course they do!

Tip-top post(s) ShowMe.

Witty and apposite.

ici

Who said that?????

I'm rubbish at other languages, but I'm pretty good at English!!

Even if you take the most conservative interpretation and assume UCL has only sought to avoid disadvantaging students who literally couldn't take any languages for GCSE, it's still just the one university. It's been frequently proposed over the last few years that other universities follow UCL's example, but I don't think they will.Mind you, if I were an MFL secondary teacher, this thread showcases why I might feel tempted to lie to pupils!

Bright pupils who are heading for traditionally academic and popular university courses are gently guided towards taking an MFL at our school and as long as I'm alive to see it, always will be. It is certainly the case that universities are now - in general terms - looking to see if potential students have a GCSE in MFL. How on earth do you think an admissions tutor with 50 places and 500 applicants chooses who gets an offer and who doesn't? Collective departmental wisdom and experience over the years will tell an admissions tutor who is likely to excel on their course and who is likely to struggle. A GCSE may be one indicator of this (amongst many others, granted). In fact, I have seen very academic science students continue an MFL at AS to be seen as a broadening of their horizons, ability to adapt etc. etc.

I have difficulty in believing this very clever girl who gets straight As in other subjects couldn't achieve better in German if she could be arsed.
She does bugger all in the subject as the OP has admitted and her mother is condoning that.

It isn't just about the languages/education/teacher though, is it? It is the rudeness, sneery attitude towards someone else who may well be doing a poor job, who really knows? He may well have been in coaching/capability, the op has assumed a lot. It is the wish to belittle and encourage ruden we which I find so unpleasant.

Absolutely Flossy but given her demonstration in general of her attitude to others, perception of her children's behaviour and of herself this rudeness, sneering and general flippancy / unpleasantness is unsurprising.
Until she develops the ability to reflect on feedback she's unlikely to modify her attitude. There are parents like her around but I've been heartened by this thread in many ways. There are so many supportive posters who value the efforts teachers make.
Of course there are poor teachers: to deny that would be foolish and blinkered but concerns need to be addressed via the appropriate channels. If the OP is concerned about the curriculum and choices this needs to be addressed with the school too. Any fully functioning adult would know and accept that.

Ok ok I'm being very very very unreasonable. Bright DCs can do well at every subject if they work at it however badly it's taught and however, much they hate it!

We should never be rude about teachers, bosses, politicians or anyone in authority even if they are total and utter twats!

Yes, we should, and I do tell my DDs to be respectful to their teachers faces, but it's utterly ridiculous to expect them to do it in private or with their friends.

Generally, my DDs are very positive about their teachers and keen to see their good points. They absolutely do respect teachers who enable them to learn.

But I'm sorry, try harder, without any direction or help at all is not the way to gain respect.

OP, having read the whole thread and particularly the last post, your whole attitude is that of an entitled, sulky teenager.

Wow, just wow .
I can't believe parents like you really exist !
What a terrible example you are setting your child . Your her parent not her friend !

Oh and it's not " utterly ridiculous to expect them not to be respectful to their teachers faces" . If I ever heard that ones of my dc's had behaved in the manner of your child I would be furious with them .

There is a big difference between being rude about someone and being rude to someone. A teenager who doesn't submit homework, giggles behind her hand, and makes a parents' evening appointment for a joke is getting the balance wrong. And probably deserves the detentions.

Nobody likes and respects everybody in a position of responsibility above them. Adulthood and maturity is about managing your disdain and dislike.

I suspect though that DD finds German hard and doesn't like that challenge. If she could engage in some study outside the classroom - start from Google - then her natural intellect could fill the gaps the teacher is leaving. Of course it's easier to sit at the back rolling her eyes.

However badly it's taught I'd expect a bright DC to make some progress in three years yes. Perhaps not be attaining As, but no progress at all? Since she started the subject? So she still can't count to ten? Introduce herself? Tell us where she went on holiday last summer? If she can't do any of that after three years with access to a German textbook she isn't as bright as you think!

This bit though,
Yes, we should, and I do tell my DDs to be respectful to their teachers faces, but it's utterly ridiculous to expect them to do it in private or with their friends.

Is spectacularly missing the point. If you teach your DC to 'be respectful to a teachers face' you make it ok for them to behave poorly. You are the ultimate authority figure in your daughters life, she should respect her teachers to your face as well as theirs! Nobody is suggesting teenagers won't slag off teachers amongst their peers- but that will happen (and should!) without you enabling it!!

Oh fuck it, I can't be bothered any more. 1/2 you lot can't read any better than I can spell

Probably the sort of attitude we might have expected

I do tell my DDs to be respectful to their teachers faces

Not quite sure how this fits in with the "giggling" at those deemed incompetent - and on such reliable authority - but no doubt you consider it reasonable behaviour. All I can say is god help your daughter when she gets to work ...

I suspect that if this girl can't get high grades with minimal effort she simply doesn't want to bother at all.
Her mother seemingly isn't interested in being a role model to her - she just wants to giggle along with whatever puerile attitude they share and be "down with da kidz"
If she had any notion of what being an adult means she'd take some of this feedback on board and reflect on it, but she's still sulking like a teenager and missing the point.

Good linguists don't need to teach

That's because they do it because they want to. My daughter is bilingual with English and Swedish and can also speak French, Spanish, Japanese, Kinyarwanda and Romanian proficiently and get by with Welsh, Irish, German and Chinese. She's currently training to be a language teacher because she wants to share her passion with others.

I'd live to be a fly on the wall in your "perfect" households where not one disrespectful word is ever spoken about school, or a teacher, no homework is ever left undone (or rushed). Where equal amounts of effort are given to subjects that are going to be studied at GCSE and those that aren't.

Honestly I don't believe such house holds exist!

(Except possibly where the DCs parents are teachers at their school and even then I wonder)

You still don't understand. It's the disrespectful infantile attitude which you are positively encouraging that people object to.

Children gossip

Yes they do. Gossip mostly = bullshit. A bit like my teacher cousin who took ill at school with ectopic pregnancy, got carted off in an ambulance for surgery and had to return to school to cope with the 'gossip' that she had tried to commit suicide in the toilets. Which obviously was just the icing on the cake really.

Gossip is the absolute last source of reliable information when it's kids talking about teachers.

And stop whining OP. You're not a victim. You can complain to the school if there is a legitimate grievance.