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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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To tell my friend I don't want to look after her DC's anymore

790 replies

evmil · 12/01/2015 13:51

I have a friend who has a full time job and quite unreliable childcare (she has aupairs but has quite a high turnover of them). She has three boys, one the same age as my DS(4) and two school age (7 and 10) and when her normal childcare falls through she asks me. Her aupair left just after christmas so since the start of term i have had her kids before school and after school Monday thru to Friday.

I looked after her kids for her yesterday as she said she needed to catch up on work. They were supposed to be here from 9 until 12ish but didn't leave until quarter past 7 last night. I was annoyed as I was supposed to be taking DSS3 somewhere but couldn't and he had to get a cab in the end and was late (DH is away so couldn't take him - i did tell her this).

Anyway, i got a text last night at about half 8 from said friend telling me she wasn't happy. I had apparently filled her kids up with junk food (we make milkshakes and biscuits and they got to try some and i sent some home with them), hadn't given them a proper dinner, they had jacket potatoes, which meant they were going to bed hungry, and I had let them play with the nerf guns and they had a go on the x-box (none of which she was happy with). She finished the text with 'i thought i could trust you to look after my boys'

I was really upset but just replied with 'perhaps it is best then if you get someone else to look after them', she didn't reply but i assumed this meant i wouldn't be having her kid anymore, but at quarter past 7 this morning she turned up at my house with them and said I'm not happy about yesterday but I am willing to give you another chance!! I didn't say anything as i didn't want to upset the boys but seriously!!

Like I said I enjoy having her kids and i know she is stuck for childcare but she doesn't pay me and i feel really under appreciated (i don't expect money, a thank you would be nice though!)

WIBU to tell her i don't want to look after her kids again because of her behaviour?

OP posts:
Ieirswnllyd · 12/01/2015 17:28

Stay firm OP and keep us updated.

brokenhearted55a · 12/01/2015 17:29

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Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AMillionNameChangesLater · 12/01/2015 17:31

What time does she pick up the kids?

Perfectlypurple · 12/01/2015 17:32

Please update with her response. I am gobsmacked at her cheek.

BastardGoDarkly · 12/01/2015 17:32

Well done on telling her straight op, where do these people get their brass neck from?!

CruCru · 12/01/2015 17:32

Ha ha. If you're getting free childcare, you have to suck up what comes.

I liked your text. I don't think this is a wind up - I can see that turning away nice kids when they arrive on your doorstep is hard to do, even if the mother is ghastly.

nemo81 · 12/01/2015 17:32

I would not have answered the door to her this morning. Her kids her responsibility. If she doesn't like the way you look aftet her kids for free then she should pay a childminder. Now you know why the aupairs leave!! Grin

Ohfourfoxache · 12/01/2015 17:33

Holy fucking shit Shock

My flabber is well and truly gasted.

What time is she due to collect them?

Nerf · 12/01/2015 17:35

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Lottapianos · 12/01/2015 17:36

Marking place. Dear god, the nerve of some people knows no bounds! Very good text OP - stand firm, ignore all sob stories, this is 100% not your problem.

And please ignore the rude sods who have been calling you a mug on here - when you're a decent sort of person, you don't expect to have to deal with this kind of entitled nonsense. Well done for getting on top of it

Nerf · 12/01/2015 17:36

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Imwoodword · 12/01/2015 17:37

Shock at this. I can never believe how rude some people are!

WhatsGoingOnEh · 12/01/2015 17:38

.

Greenkit · 12/01/2015 17:38

Marking my place

chasingtherainbow · 12/01/2015 17:39

:-O I can see how she has such a high turn over of aupairs!

Text her and tell her you will no longer be looking after her boys effect immediately. Then drop her ungrateful ass as a friend asap. Fucking cheek of her is unreal!

AmarettoSour · 12/01/2015 17:40

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chasingtherainbow · 12/01/2015 17:41

Oh bugger. I'm sure it just said 1 page ... If my comment is at all irrelevant I apologise. I'm off to RTFT Blush

Cuddledaroundacat · 12/01/2015 17:41

I think she has abandoned them and now expects the OP to adopt them.

SinisterBuggyMonth · 12/01/2015 17:42

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Bogeyface · 12/01/2015 17:42

I am happy to believe its genuine, I know someone just like the entitled mother. Thankfully I have never been a victim as I dont know her very well, but my friend has and was in a similar position. When my friend No, enough is enough, she just kept turning up as if nothing had been said! In the end she started taking her kids to breakfast club at school so wasnt there when the "friend" turned up. All hell broke loose, but afawk the entitled one had to start using a childminder. She probably takes the piss with her too!

ThreeQuartersEmpty · 12/01/2015 17:45

She will assume you don't really mean it, and bring them anyway.

Whatisaweekend · 12/01/2015 17:46

Never heard anything so spectacularly ungrateful!!

I would text "you seem to be mistaking me for someone you actually pay. Even if you apologise for your appalling rudeness I will not be providing free childcare out of the goodness of my heart for you anymore".

BadtzMaru · 12/01/2015 17:49

Well done for telling her to find an alternative OP, she can use the school breakfast club/after school club and bloody pay for it like everyone else.

RandomFriend · 12/01/2015 17:52

Give her a bill for the childcare you have done over the past two months.

ElephantsAndMiasmas · 12/01/2015 17:52

bloody bloody hell, wish I didn't believe this! WELL DONE OP :)