To expect the au pair to eat breakfast in her own time?

[Mammagaga]

The au pair works from 8-10 every morning AIBU to expect that she feeds the baby at 8am instead of leaving her screaming while she makes and eats her own breakfast?!

I'm afraid the obvious question is why you haven't fed the baby instead of twitching about someone else doing it.

Assuming you suffer such extreme circumstances that you're physically incapable of warming up a bottle of milk - the au pair is supposed to be en famille and should be eating breakfast with DC.

Also, if you leave her in sole charge without guidance, it's up to her whether she feeds herself or the baby first. God knows how she stands the racket, though.

The Op might be feeding other children or doing something, anything, else which is why she pays the aupair to do it.

Au pairs don't arrive, they live in. Although we had one who used to 'arrive' home at 6.30am.

Why are you, the parent, not feeding your baby? Babies shouldn't get to the point of melting down in the first place if you can help it. You feed them before they get upset, so really the baby should be being fed at 7:45am before they get beyond just whiny complaints.

What are you doing whilst your baby is apparently screaming?

Actually I'm hoping the baby isn't actually yours since you said 'the baby' instead of 'my'

A baby who is screaming by 8am should have been given breakfast at 7:30. Presumably by the parents who had charge at that point.

An au pair is supposed to be treated as a family member - as if she was a much older sibling of the child being cared for. Not a professional. I would totally expect a nanny to eat breakfast beforehand but you aren't paying nanny rates so don't get nanny service.

YABU.

Can somebody please feed that baby.

Yabu as shes an au pair (member of family) not a nanny. I thought au pairs lived in to care for older children whilst learning english. Why you leaving your baby to cry. Surely you there too. Doesnt add up? (Confused!)

So you have a babysitter that does 2 hours a day? Not an au-pair?

What did you tell her her duties would be in her contract?

Because she has one, right?

Au-pair contracts, as everyone who has been one (me) or had one (lots of people on here) knows, are quite rigid with their rules.

Do you let your baby scream until 8am when she starts her shift then? If so, I'd say you are being unreasonable. Feed the baby at 7.30 if it is screaming hungry by 8am.

Why isn't one of the baby's parents feeding the baby?

YANBU - our au pair eats before she comes on duty.

Just ask her to eat first, you have to direct au pairs more, so she won't get everything right immediately.

More information is needed before I can tell if YABU or not.

Mostly questions already asked - like how many hours does she work a day and why does she not start until 8am and the baby hasn't eaten by then?
If she is only working 2 hours a day how is she affording to support herself financially?

Feed yer own kid

@ DM woman with the dodgy eye!

..and green dress.

The answer surely is baby led weaning ;)

Au pairs are meant to be like family so surely feeding the baby with one hand & herself with the other

Where have you gone OP?

On the facts you have stated Yanbu.

The au pair should get up 15 minutes earlier and have her breakfast then before she starts work.

Oh FFS, no of course yanbu. Unless you do a massive drip feed making you sound like a wanker.

If an au pair is supposed to help you by feeding your baby at breakfast time then they should sit down and eat breakfast with your baby, or like you said have breakfast before. I don't think that's an unreasonable request.
Don't worry about saying "the baby" either, I call my dts the kids all the time. Most my rl friends do it, it's only on mn that it's a sin.

My dts used to go from happy to hungry in 30 seconds, isn't that what babies do ? It doesn't necessarily mean the op sits around reading Tatler while the baby cries and the poor au pair sits in the shed eating breakfast.

Isn't 8 am quite late for a baby's breakfast. My ds was starving by 7.30 (greedy)

I don't know anything about au-pairs as I never was one/had one but I do know that when my DC were babies they were demanding breakfast long before 8.00am!

The baby is 18 months old, I'm not in the house to witness the screaming - maybe the poster who commented that lives in lala land if they think people would pay an au pair whilst they are in the house and sit down and watch their own child scream? I get up at 6am and get myself ready for work, my school age children ready for school and wake the baby and get her dressed before I leave for work at 8am. I have been made aware of what is going on by my other children, and my husband was late for work one morning and walked into the kitchen to find the baby strapped in a high chair screaming at which he asked what was going on and the au pair claimed to him that she didn't realise he was allowed to eat breakfast. (After having an induction week where she saw her being fed and fed her herself). Since this incident my 11 year old has made me aware that he has had to miss his breakfast because she has instructed him to feed the baby.

My AIBU question is not to canvas opinion on whether or not I should have an au pair, how much I pay my au pair (well above the average) or which newspaper I read.

AIBU expecting that if she wants to eat breakfast she could get her arse out of bed 10 minutes earlier without expecting that she has the right to tend to her own needs during time that I am paying her to take care of a baby. As it stands the only solution appears to be to change her hours so that she works from 730-930 which screws me up just so that my children can eat breakfast.

For all of you claiming au pairs work over hours for crap money she gets accommodation in Central London, a zone 1-6 travel card, £120 a week, all food provided and only works 10 hours a week. IMO she is not treated badly.

Feed the baby at 7.30. All 3 of mine would be starving by 8.