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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be horrified at the thought of this?

64 replies

FourthMary · 03/01/2015 11:41

Dsd has very kindly invited ds to her swimming party, lovely that she wants him to go. However as he is 3, he can't go in unaccompanied, so I will have to go in with him. Dh can't due to a skin condition.

The thought of being practically stripped bare in front of their mum, family and friends is giving me palpitations.

I need to get a grip or do a quick 10 day diet, work out

OP posts:
Aeroflotgirl · 03/01/2015 11:43

I think yes you would have to accompany him, he is still very little, it depends on the staff adult ratios in the pool.

SandStorm · 03/01/2015 11:44

How old is dsd? Does he even want to go if there's a big age gap? Will he know anyone else there?

If the answer is yes, then go and have fun. Noone will notice what you're wearing/look like, chances are they'll just be grateful for another pair of hands.

SoupDragon · 03/01/2015 11:44

I think I would find a reason to decline!

TheReluctantCountess · 03/01/2015 11:48

She might just have invited him out of politeness. In that case, she'll be relieved if you decline.

DaisyFlowerChain · 03/01/2015 11:53

I'd find a reason to decline too. I hate pool parties where adults need to join in as the child is too young to be having one and there are hundreds of alternatives.

fuzzpig · 03/01/2015 11:56

I think it might seem a bit mean to decline.

I would be having palpitations too though!

queenjellybelly · 03/01/2015 12:03

I would hate this!!! But I would probably be very shallow & get myself all waxed, tanned & plucked in all the right places, new swimsuit just so that I feel at my most confident & then jump right in to show what a fabulous hands on mum I am!

RiojaHaze · 03/01/2015 12:03

Sorry but I think YABU and need to get a grip.
DD wanted a swimming party but as so many of the mums wouldn't get in the pool too, I had to do something else otherwise no one would have come!

Do you think everyone else looks like an extra off Baywatch, are confident too and are more concerned with looking after their children and having fun with them in the pool than looking you up and down in your swimsuit??

Original poster
FourthMary · 03/01/2015 12:04

Dsd will be 10 so I imagine I would be the only adult in the pool.

I am also not a great swimmer and don't relish the thought of clambering over inflatables with an audience.

Dsd is very excited though and wants me to be on her team for the relay race Sad.

I really can't see a way out of this without disappointing someone. Oh good god.

OP posts:
littleleftie · 03/01/2015 12:08

What about that ear infection you picked up OP?I don't see how you can really go now.....what a shame Sad

Only1scoop · 03/01/2015 12:11

Oh Lordy Op I'm cringing for you....

Although I'm sure you have nothing to cringe about Smile

TheyLearnedFromBrian · 03/01/2015 12:16

Tightly supportive mid-sleeved sports top like instructors wear in the pool, with mid-calf shorts? You could even wear something supportive under it! - and you'd look all sleek and devil-may-care to the other mums sipping coffee... could be a winner!

hesterton · 03/01/2015 12:19

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

hesterton · 03/01/2015 12:19

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Chocolateteacake · 03/01/2015 12:20

Wet suit? I've noticed more women swimming in surf shorts and a T-shirt.

juliascurr · 03/01/2015 12:20

why can't his mother go in?

MissHJ · 03/01/2015 12:21

Well dsd mother does not have a problem you being there otherwise you and your son would not be invited. So i think it's nice that you are going to be there with her brother. Little bit awkward perhaps but it's a large pool so just concentrate on your son and I am sure it will be fine.

SoupDragon · 03/01/2015 12:22

why can't his mother go in?

the OP is his mother.

Original poster
FourthMary · 03/01/2015 12:23

Liking the ear infection idea and carefully constructed swimming outfit Smile.

OP posts:
fuctifino · 03/01/2015 12:23

OP is the mother.

And no, I wouldn't do it.
Can you suggest he sits it out but does the food bit after?

meandjulio · 03/01/2015 12:24

You really don't have to clamber over inflatables. TBH at 3 he would struggle with that wouldn't he, or if he wouldn't you could just swim alongside? Just take him in the learner pool. Take a large robe and put by the side of the pool so you aren't uncovered for long. Tell him in no uncertain terms that you won't be doing the relay race. But don't deny him this lovely treat. The fact is that most people look better the fewer clothes they wear.

skylark2 · 03/01/2015 12:25

I wouldn't take a 3 year old to a 10 year old's swimming party with inflatables and races - I'm surprised it's even allowed by the pool. I wouldn't feel it was safe even if I was right there, and even though I have no issues with wearing a swimsuit to go swimming.

Why don't you ask what time they're getting out of the pool to have food and take your little one along then?

DoJo · 03/01/2015 14:22

Our local pool has inflatables all half term and there are no restrictions on others going in the pool - it's just a bouncy castle in the water, and it's tethered to the sides - my son loves going to watch. Unless it is a diving pool, there will be a shallow end where you can stay with your son and he is unlikely to be able to really participate in the races etc, just splash about enjoying the big kids' excitement. You should warn your step daughter that you probably won't be able to participate in the relay though, as unless someone else will be able to hold onto your son, you will need to stay with him.

Vvvoom · 03/01/2015 16:12

There is NO way I would do this. Tell your dds that he's too little for a swimming party but you'll take them both swimming another day.

Mammanat222 · 03/01/2015 16:18

Good grief don't go in a wetsuit, you'd stick out like a sore thumb!

Get yourself a nice swimsuit from M&S that sucks you in.

I know you wont look forward to it but I do think you should go. DSD is excited and it sounds like you all have a good thing going on so no sense in offending anyone.