Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask what is the rudest thing a friend or relative has ever done at a meal out?

279 replies

BallsforEarings · 27/12/2014 15:50

When out at a meal with a bunch of friends, my ex-friend (never popular -known for rudeness!) once asked if she could taste my chilli con carne, I said 'of course' and she proceeded to take a huge forkful and then pronounce loudly 'UGGHHH!! That is SHIT'.

I was left to 'enjoy' the rest of my chilli after that!

Anyone got/had a friend/relative with worse manners?

OP posts:
MegMogandOwlToo · 27/12/2014 15:58

Not manners related, but meal out related.

We went out for a big family meal at an Indian restaurant - extended family, so grandparents, aunts, cousins etc, I think around 25 adults all together.

The bill was spilt equally between all adults, and everyone bar one couple put cash down, which included a tip. The last couple took the cash and paid the exact bill on their card. We didn't realise until afterwards, but it meant that they'd eaten for free, if not profited!

1981 · 27/12/2014 16:03

Many, many examples.

A particular sub-set of relatives thinks nothing of making "banter" with waiting staff (that they don't know, as in, aren't regulars) which always lay across the fine line between riske to unacceptable. I'm waiting for the day my BIL gets a "fuck off" in response. I'd back up the staff if a manager is ever called.

Also, I have a colleague who's the loudest, most disgusting eater on the planet. Lovely bloke but it's so noticeable - talks with his mouth full of food - literally 1 second after putting something in there. Also leans too close to you so the spittle hits you Sad It's bad but I've not gone to a couple of team lunch events because I kid you not I always end up sitting next to him, and it's too unpleasant to endure at every team lunch. I would never say anything though!

That's about it. I have seen a woman change a dirty nappy at a restaurant table (as in, ON the table) before though. Not in my party, near us.

Cataline · 27/12/2014 16:06

I had a friend once put her head on the table and go to sleep. Shd used to set fire to napkins with the candles too. We don't go out with her any more....

PunkrockerGirl · 27/12/2014 16:06

Meg that's awful! Xmas Shock

juneybean · 27/12/2014 16:08

My dad on Christmas day at a pub ate his pudding then noticed the lady on another table had left hers so asked her for it! Grim.

MozzchopsThirty · 27/12/2014 16:08

Oh lots with my mother!

Very rarely would we manage a meal out without her complaining about:

The slowness of the staff 'have they forgotten me'
The choice of food 'I don't like foreign food/pasta/sauce/tomatoey dishes/rare meat/different veg
If we had a waiter/waitress who's first language was not English she would speak slowly and loudly as if they were thick
Always tried to get a discount/free dessert etc for some imaginary downfall

I don't see her now Grin

iklboo · 27/12/2014 16:11

Not really rude, but we took FIL & his wife out for a meal for his 70th birthday. Three courses, wine, brandies etc - lovely meal. He said as we'd paid the bill, he'd pay the tip - the staff had been brilliant, nothing too much trouble & service charge hadn't been included in the bill. He took out his wallet, put 20p piece on the table & loudly announced they should be grateful for it or lump it as 'they're no better than they ought' (whatever the feck that means to him).

We left a larger tip ourselves as he was getting his coat.

SparklyReindeerShit · 27/12/2014 16:12

My ex's gran once banged loudly on the table to get the waiting staff's attention. I was mortified but very young and didn't dare say a word.

Trazzletoes · 27/12/2014 16:14

When leaving school went out with my class for a meal, one girl thought it was hysterical to pour salt in a giant cocktail jug so we had to pay for a drink we couldn't drink.

Once in France went to their version of pizza express, my friend ordered a pizza and specified without nuts (she wasn't allergic but didn't like them). They forgot and brought her pizza absolutely covered with nuts. She complained and they said they would remake it. Clearly scraped off as many nuts as they could and then brought the same pizza back to her.

Once I was on holiday in a group of about 10 friends and one girl was known as being extremely tight. We divided the bill equally and happened tobe the exact amount of one person's bill short. Everyone swore blind they had chipped in. No one had seen her put anything in though so she got her meal at a 10th of the cost and we all had to subsidise her. Never ate with her again.

Joysmum · 27/12/2014 16:16

We've been out with people who let the kids run around and be messy yet not get the worst up. Never again.

Mammanat222 · 27/12/2014 16:17

I too have many examples.

I have posted before about my friend who took her toddler out of the restaurant we were eating in (it was just me, her and our 2 boys) as her DS was playing up. To be fair he wasn't even that bad.

Starters had just arrived, I assumed she was taking him for a walk round the block but no she took her child home and left me there - with 2 lots of starters, 2 main courses, her son's meal and I of course had to pay for the lot. She didn't answer her phone and it was only later that night I received an apology! She did end up paying me back as well.

Worse one had to be when 3 of us went out for cocktails and then headed to our fave Turkish place for dinner. We ordered a Mezze (loads and loads of little dishes we all liked not just a set menu) but as we were waiting one of my friends started to feel unwell. She ran off up a side road to puke her guts up and other friend went with her. So I was left with a Mezze for 3 - and we'd massively over ordered.

Friend rang me to say other friend was really being violently ill and couldn't be left / wasn't fit to be put in a taxi. I have a serious vomit phobia so wasn't much help. I ended up picking at some food and then asking for it all to be packed up as a take-away. Not before a Canadian couple befriended me as they felt sorry for me and thought I as having a meal all on my lonesome.

Ill friend ended up staying at my house, other friend got chips on the way home and my OH had Mezze for lunch and dinner the next day.

Titsalinabumsquash · 27/12/2014 16:20

I went out with my exp and another couple of his friends for my birthday to a local western themed restaurant, one guy proceeded to click his fingers at the waitress repeatedly and loudly to get her attention and then complained that he was 'a real man' (read obese) so these portions weren't enough for him. He called the waitress sweetheart, babe, darlin' all evening too.

I haven't seen him since but I sure as hell made him aware he was a twat and left her a hefty tip and made sure to apologise in person for his behaviour since he wouldn't. I was AngryBlush all at once.

worm77daisy · 27/12/2014 16:27

We once went for a meal with another couple the bloke was a complete prat, first of all he got up half way though the meal to go and have a sun bed and then when he came back proceeded to get a book out and read at the table. God I hated him.

MrsHathaway · 27/12/2014 16:28

At a big celebratory family dinner for about fifty, had the honour of sitting next to Aunty Knobhead. She complained about every single dish, scraped leftovers and stacked plates (despite repeated very polite hints from staff and more direct reminders from us), mashed DS(5)'s pudding into slush so it was inedible, complained

Sparklingbrook · 27/12/2014 16:34

DFIL got the waitress to go through every sweet in the display cabinet explaining what was in it, asking loads of questions etc etc. Then thanked her and said he was a bit full and didn't want one.

Dionysuss · 27/12/2014 16:34

A large group of us went out for a meal when I was at college. It was a set menu so we all knew the cost beforehand and were all paying our fair share. Someone had their boyfriend tag along, who then declared he was broke, so could she pay for his food. After we had ordered. He drank like a fish, ordering doubles and expecting the gf to cover it too. Only when the bill arrived she didn't have enough money so we all had to chip in to cover the rest.

AlpacaStockingOnChristmasEve · 27/12/2014 16:37

Not really awful, but left me and others feeling uncomfortable... We were out at a nice pub celebrating someone's birthday and we always just pay for what we have, none of this 'there's ten of us lets divide the bill into ten' things.
So I worked out how much money I had and ordered accordingly, making sure I had enough for a tip as well. When the bill came, one of the women said loudly 'surely we are going to treat to her meal?'
The celebrator protested half heartedly but is (in a nice way) a bit of a pushover and the woman who made the suggestion is very forthright, and said things like 'surely everyone can just chip in an extra few pounds'

Well, I didn't have more than about 1.50 left so I put that in, feeling so cheap. If it had been suggested before hand, or it was tradition in our group to treat the birthday person, then I would have been prepared but it was sprung on us as a done deal and everyone else looked a bit stunned as well but not wanting to be the first one to speak up...

I was interested to note that no such suggestion was made at the meal we all went on when it was my birthday...

Dionysuss · 27/12/2014 16:39

Oh another one!

My lovely late nan was originally from Berlin. We went on a short holiday there with her, as she wanted to reminisce. One afternoon we had lunch in a bar restaurant. We were chatting away in English, when my nan suddenly turns round and starts screeching in German at the waiter behind who had suddenly gone red and turned very sheepish. He had made a comment about us not knowing my nan could understand.

MrsTawdry · 27/12/2014 16:41

MrsHathaway I'm afraid your judging of your Aunt's habit of clearing up is FAR worse than her tidying.

MrsTawdry · 27/12/2014 16:43

Dionysuss my friend did that! She's half German but speaks Italian and French as well as German and English...her English is perfect though...sounds a bit like the Queen.

We were in a small hotel on the Italian Swiss border and an older woman said in German "What DOES she think she looks like in that coat!" about my friend and she turned and spoke quietly back in German to the rude woman about how one shouldn't make comments about other people's appearance.

Woman was scarlet! It was great!

samithesausage · 27/12/2014 16:55

Couple of things happened at uni,
We all went out for a meal (think about 15 of us) and one woman put it on their credit card and pocketed the tips so her and her kids got a free meal.
Another one was 4 of us booked a table at a restaurant and we were having drinks in a pub before hand. (I think we were meeting up in the pub). I got followed by someone in our course, he was known to be a bit clingy and followed women everywhere.. So he followed me to the pub. Which was fine, drink with mates sort of thing... But he followed us to the restaurant, which was only booked for 4 people and wouldn't take any hints/direct comments about it being a 4 person table. The restaurant did their best to accomodate him, but we (group of 4 girls) really wanted a girly night out.

AlpacaStockingOnChristmasEve · 27/12/2014 17:16

Oh my god, that's embarrassing! I would have cringed...

MrsHathaway · 27/12/2014 17:20

Really, MrsT? Perhaps you had to be there. Also not all my post sent Hmm ["smart"phone]

She was stacking nonidentical plates in tall piles, so the waiting staff couldn't carry them (too unstable) and had to undo the piles to be able to clear, now with gravy etc on the undersides making a mess of their sleeves.

It wasn't the stacking per se (I would definitely do that in the pub, where all the plates are the same shape and size, for example) but that she kept doing it even though it was actively unhelpful, and before the whole table had finished eating - a slop of other. people's scraps inches from your plate puts you off the rest, mind you - and with a sort of grumpy "tsk this should have been cleared by now" commentary throughout.

DS's pudding I am prepared to be told I was pfb about Grin but he had been sitting so well through a long, grownup dinner and finally got the pudding he was so looking forward to ... and she snatched it from him, rendered it in his eyes inedible (mashing in the cream he'd carefully pushed to the edge) and then told him off for not eating it. I was early pregnant and ... erm ... a bit hormonal about it.

CruCru · 27/12/2014 17:21

Hmm. I have a couple.

I organised my friend's hen do. I'd sent an email round to say If you are are on a tight budget, let me know and I'll try to accommodate you but as we are having a day and evening of "activities" there will be a cost. We got the bill for the restaurant - two courses and a shit load of wine for £25 each including tip. One of the group made an almighty fuss and wanted me to go through the bill person by person to check that the staff hadn't added anything we hadn't had. Ugh.

The second was the boyfriend of an ex friend. He turned up while we were waiting for a table (meaning we had to wait for longer), was rude to the waiter and yelled, actually yelled, at the man on the next table for smoking.

MrsTawdry · 27/12/2014 17:21

MrsH the complaining and mashing were very rude but I suspect the stacking and scraping was ignorance. And it's never nice to judge people for that.