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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask what is the rudest thing a friend or relative has ever done at a meal out?

279 replies

BallsforEarings · 27/12/2014 15:50

When out at a meal with a bunch of friends, my ex-friend (never popular -known for rudeness!) once asked if she could taste my chilli con carne, I said 'of course' and she proceeded to take a huge forkful and then pronounce loudly 'UGGHHH!! That is SHIT'.

I was left to 'enjoy' the rest of my chilli after that!

Anyone got/had a friend/relative with worse manners?

OP posts:
MrsDeVere · 27/12/2014 17:27

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

toldmywrath · 27/12/2014 17:31

Meg that is dreadful! My (now deceased) grandad used to take out his false teeth & lick off any stuff that had stuck to the palate of said false teeth-is that rude or just disgusting?
Also a friend regularly describes her bowel movements whilst we are eating out!

MrsHathaway · 27/12/2014 17:32

I see what you mean, MrsT, and you're right that sneering at the "wrong" manners is very rude.

It may have been ignorance at first but by the time she was going against the expressed wishes of the people she claimed to be trying to help, she lost that excuse. And it really spoiled the atmosphere for the rest on the table (including her DH who is far more easy going than I am) which is what this thread is about.

On which note, it's so obvious as to be a cliche... We've all been out in a mixed group where it's the richest and greediest who announces at the end of dinner that we will be splitting the bill equally. Cue office junior going white and spending her bus fare on his steak/lobster/Chateauneuf du Pape... Angry

DuelingFanjo · 27/12/2014 17:36

Someone I know sends whole meals back then encourages the rest of us to do the same, in pubs. So awful.

NeedaDiscoNap · 27/12/2014 17:39

I have a 'friend' who does the pay on card thing. A group of us meet fairly regularly for lunch.

She never has cash with her and always says she'll pay on her credit card. Took me a while to cotton on that she was using it to pay a much reduced price for her food. She also never contributes to the tip. Now I make a point of making sure everything is split equally and that we all get change before making a fuss about the tip. She added the tip on once or twice to the card payment before miraculously turning up with cash next time.

I also have a friend who stays with us two or three times a year. When she visits we tend to eat out once or twice. She never pays. She assumes that me or DH will and says 'I'll transfer it' - never does. I snapped the last time and directed her to a cash point before the meal.

flashnorman · 27/12/2014 17:41

SILs boyfriend at the time (now husband ??) made an absolute show of us all in a lovely restaurant. He & SIL were sitting opposite each other, there were about 12 of us there. Lovely Aussie waiter was serving us & SIL started to chat to him about Australia. She was genuinely just being friendly as was the waiter, no flirtiness in it & her b/f took it in completely the wrong way. Started being vile to the waiter, sent his food back & had a right go at him about the food, of which there was nothing wrong with either, everyone else cleared the plate. He was just being a jealous fucker that his g/f was talking to & enjoying a conversation with another man. When the bill came he refused to pay for his food & stormed out! The rest of us were so apologetic to the waiter & made sure there was a large tip for him. SIL was so upset & embarrassed (yet she later married the prick!)

MrsSchadenfreude · 27/12/2014 17:42

I went to a work dinner party once with a load of colleagues at someone's house. I'd just started work there. The drink and drugs were flowing. Two of the guests (not a couple) got under the table and had sex. Everyone just ignored them and carried on eating.

ilovesooty · 27/12/2014 17:48

The last time I ate out with my sister I was appalled. We (us, my BIL and niece) met on a local Harvester. I got there first and ordered a J2O. They arrived and I asked what they wanted to drink. She ordered unlimited diet coke for all of them and made no attempt to redress this when the bill came as obviously they didn't need another paid drink. When I ordered myself another J2O during the meal she didn't offer to pay. She sent her steak back St least 3 times and when the bill came she looked at my niece (who was home from university doing a part time weekend job) and said "I'll work your share out and you can pay me when we get home".
She divided the bill by 4 then I asked how much we were going to tip. She said very loudly" You tip if you want. No one tips me to do my job". I had to cover the whole tip myself and I'm sure that lovely waitress heard. I was mortified.

Chillyegg · 27/12/2014 17:51

My sisters twattish boyfriend always turns up to meals/ gatherings / the pub without any money. So my sister always has to pay! He once went on a night out with my brother and his mates compleatly penniless my brothers mates had to subsidise him. He also makes my sister pay for everything! I dislike him a lot

ilovesooty · 27/12/2014 17:51

So it worked out that I paid for all the drinks, my quarter of the food and covered the tip. She's a tight little fucker.

MatildaTheRedNosedReinCat · 27/12/2014 17:56

MrsS Shock, that's pretty rude Grin.

We all clubbed together to pay for pil to go on the Orient Express fro their Golden wedding anniversary. You go on a long ride basically and get served a lovely meal and drinks. FIL is notoriously hard to please a miserable, complaining bastard any on their return complained about every aspect of the meal in some way or another. The next day he phoned my SIL to tell her the 'good news' that he had complained and received a partial refund for the meal. We were very Angry.

catgirl1976 · 27/12/2014 18:00

I know some one who went for a meal in an Indian but "doesn't eat Indian food" so ordered a pizza to be delivered to his table Shock

Doilooklikeatourist · 27/12/2014 18:03

Blimey , mines a bit boring after that one !

Out for Sunday lunch , me .DH , 2 DC , MIL and PIL
Very nice roast dinner , plated being cleared by young waitress when PIL leans in as if to say something nice to waitress. , but instead says ..
Could you tell the chef that's the toughest beef I've ever eaten ...
I was shocked !
They gave us our desserts for free , and I left a massive tip and apologised to the waitress ( the beef was delicious )

Another time , we'd beed waiting along time for our coffee , when it arrived MIL said to the waiter .. Did you go to Kenya and pick the beans yourself ?

Then there was the time I misjudged the step down from the ladies room , fell and tore the ligaments in my ankle ( ooouchhh )
And no , I hadn't had a shedload of wine

Asks self why do we still go out for lunch with them ?

Chippednailvarnish · 27/12/2014 18:03

Dh's best mate blew his nose noisily on a linen napkin.

I nearly puked.

ilovesooty · 27/12/2014 18:11

My previous line manager joined our work night out for Christmas. Set Mexican meal that we'd ordered in advance. He sat next to me and moved down the table within minutes to sit "with the boys". My male colleagues weren't amused. He ordered his own salad and proceeded to pinch stuff from the plate of the newest team member. He then left before the bill came. He still owes me for the lunch I paid for months ago on a day out as he "hadn't any cash".

Original poster
BallsforEarings · 27/12/2014 18:22

These stories of unbridled rudeness at the table are pure quality! Grin

What a rude breed us humans are, would be better off at a chimps tea party! [grin}

OP posts:
AwfulBeryl · 27/12/2014 18:24

Most of mine have been lateness, just turning up 1.5 hours late and waltzing in without apologising. So nothing too scandalous.

If they are on here they might put us down as an example because we got fed up with it and ordered with out them after a while, they turned up around an hour late just as we were finishing our meals. They were really Shock. It really was annoying though, their phones would be off or they wouldn't answer and although we did know they would turn up eventually, we were bloody hungry.

1981 · 27/12/2014 18:33

My sisters twattish boyfriend always turns up to meals/ gatherings / the pub without any money. So my sister always has to pay!

I assume you'd have spotted this, but are you sure she's actually paying? I do this with DH most days Blush We have a joint account but I can't always be bothered carrying my bag and purse around, so he pays for everything, literally... except it's all coming out of our joint account, which I contribute 50% to almost down to the penny.. so I'm paying my share, if you see what I mean.

Or do you mean your sister is actually subsidising her boyfriend, in which case that's bloody rude to pretend he has no money (how does he keep excusing it?!)

sooperdooper · 27/12/2014 19:01

ilovesooty I don't understand what was wrong with her ordering unlimited diet cokes? Surely that means they get free refills so they only pay for one drink? Confused

RachelWatts · 27/12/2014 19:07

I went out for a pub lunch with some work colleagues.

When the bill arrived, the first person had a look, then put enough money in the saucer to cover their meal and drink and a bit extra for the tip and passed it down the table, where the next person did the same and so on.

The bill and money made their way all the way to the end, where the last person looked at the bill and then counted the money before putting his contribution in.

"Excellent" he said. "I only need to put in £1.50" and did so, in effect stealing the tip from the waiting staff.

Another colleague was so embarrassed that he left another tip.

RachelWatts · 27/12/2014 19:08

sooperdooper I think the issue is that an unlimited coke is more expensive than a usual drink and sooty was buying it.

AgentCooper · 27/12/2014 19:13

I have a pal who likes to boast loudly about her many achievements when we're out for dinner, deliberately take as long as she can to decide what she wants (when the server is standing waiting) and act all 'cute' when she changes her mind for the 80th time. And she always queries the bill and usually manages to get away without paying for something.

And I know a guy who treats waiting staff like his subordinates and bellows orders. He wants to be seen as Mr Alpha Male but he is clearly so insecure.

I have apologised on behalf of these people several times.

ScrambledEggAndToast · 27/12/2014 19:13

Rachel Shock Some people are so scandalous and have such a brass neck. I went out with a couple who did almost exactly that. Everyone else put in the agreed amount but when it came to their turn they just put in enough to make it up to enough to pay the total on the bill. Surprise surprise, the man of the couple was one of the biggest drinkers of the group. To say I was annoyed was an understatement.

ilovesooty · 27/12/2014 19:20

Yes, thanks Rachel that's what the issue was. I had to buy my own drinks as well as paying for theirs with no adjustment to the bill to cover their share. I was more appalled by her behaviour over the top though. That was embarrassing.

Titsalinabumsquash · 27/12/2014 19:21

I know a family that will buy 1 unlimited refill coke and use it to give the whole group a drink each (taking turns) if questioned by staff about it they ask for tap water to drink for everyone else.

It's not breaking any rules or laws but I think it's horribly cheap. Confused (Awaits flaming)

It's like families that use the all you can eat wrist bands at theme parks to feed a big family all day even though they've only bought 1 person a band.

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