I often find myself playing What's the Next Excuse? when reading, eg:
Leave that place/office/party now, OP.
I can't drive and am too poverty-stricken to have a car anyway.
Can you just walk away?
No, I'm in a remote, rural area. Plus I have a Vague Disability.
Can you call a taxi?
No! I'm skint! Why do I have to keep explaining myself? I just want some support!
Call a friend to come get you, OP!
I have no friends, I never have, especially after I had to go into hiding (I posted about this in another thread but it was deleted for some reason).
Call the police.
No, my exBF/Dsis/neighbour is police and I can't trust them/stand the embarrassment!
OP, PM me, I'm nearby and will come collect you.
Erm...no, it's all okay now.
Oh yes, I LOVE those. 
It never ceases to amaze me how many people on Mumsnet say they 'have no-one' whatsoever in their RL. 
Which one was Liftzilla? Was it the woman who really disliked having to lift share with her obnoxious female colleague who smoked in the car and played loud music? I don't remember that going pear shaped.