Claridges Breastfeeding Policy

[ifgrandmahadawilly]

Aibu in posting this here, in the hopes that the people of mumsnet let Claridges know how unreasonable they are being?

www.telegraph.co.uk/women/womens-health/11267989/Mother-forced-to-cover-up-with-large-napkin-while-breastfeeding-at-Claridges.html

One of the great things my Dad taught me was not to concern myself with anything that doesn't affect me. It's great. Always his response to tale-telling when I was a child was "what harm us it doing you?" And when I had to admit that it wasn't doing any harm to me, I had to accept that I had to stop being a busybody. It's easy to learn and really is a far better way to live.

Someone feeding her baby isn't affecting anyone else in any way. You can avert your gaze - it's very rude to stare anyway - and get on with living your own life unbothered by things that are none if your business.

well, I think people need to see and hear the 'other side' here.
I do support breast feeding in public BUT I also think women need to be sensitive to other people's feelings.

When my DCs were babies- 25 years ago- breastfeeding in public was frowned upon. What people have to remember is that there are some members of the public who still find breastfeeding in public embarrassing or just not something they wish to see. You might say that is their problem, but I do think we ought to be aware of how other people in their 70s and 80s may feel uncomfortable being in close proximity with naked breasts. And not all women are discreet. Some women where I live think nothing - it appears- of showing their breasts in the middle of caffe nero with no attempt at all to be discreet- in fact they sometimes look as if they are seeking attention. Other women use s shawl or a muslin nappy, and it's barely noticeable they are feeding.

It's being disingenuous to talk abut breast as if they are only used for feeding. They also have a sexual function and some older people do not want to see naked breasts.

It's courteous to consider those around you and also understand how other people may feel uncomfortable, especially when they belong to a generation when breast feeding in public didn't happen as much.

I think I was really lucky when breastfeeding DD (until she was 16 months so a fair spectrum of incidences where she could have exposed me etc!). Most often I was ignored/no one noticed and sometimes people smiled. On one occasion whilst waiting for a hospital apt, a woman declared loudly that my DD was sleeping very soundly and I said, no she's just having a feed (and probably sleeping at the same time tbf- I was a mobile pacifier).

My last public feed was in an M&S café when DD was 15.5 months. No issues. I have walked all round the Tate Modern with her feeding- no issues. I have fed her in Brown's Hotel in Mayfair for afternoon tea (much better customer service than Claridges anyway).

When my DCs were babies- 25 years ago- breastfeeding in public was frowned upon.
Must depend where you live, because when my first DC were babies (38 and 39 years ago) you would see mothers breastfeeding in public and the La Leche League organised a public demonstration of breastfeeding in the local library! I did think that was OTT though.
I do agree about being sensitive to others.

Furious with the treatment of this women. I'm no longer Bf but this is really going to put off those that want to do it.

Have written an email to the manager. Think this is the address...... [email protected]

pinkfrocks when I was a baby (43 years ago) my mum said she happily breastfed my DB and I - London area and quite hippyish back then.

I actually before now was against BF in public but since this and others' stances am for it. What does it matter where you feed your baby? Rather have a quiet and fed baby than a baby crying because its hungry.

I'm quite surprised by all the fictional elderly people who mind because when I was feeding my 3 it was generally the oldest people who made the nicest comments about it.
IME it was the late middle aged women and younger men who seemed uncomfortable with it.
I'd be surprised if the awful comments online were elderly people, anyway - hostility often comes from younger men for whom it's an issue to do with keeping women in their place as sexual objects.

Nick Ferrari is a huge, throbbing bell end of a man. Whatever he says (and he is so boringly predictable) I always automatically think the opposite. Man-in-telling-woman-what-to-do-and-how-to-feed-her-own-baby-shocker.

I really don't get this whole 'you should be mindful of others so don't breastfeed in public' thing either. Seriously unless you are really, looking there is nothing to see. You don't even have to 'look away'. Do you have to 'look away' to not see the man on the next table tucking into his sandwich? No because you dont give a shit. As for whole 'breasts are sexual' thing, yes they are, but their primary use is for feeding a baby. The sex thing is secondary, as difficult as that is for some blokes to deal with the fact that a woman's breasts are not solely for them to suck on.

I think that having to see Nick Ferrari's ugly, bigoted mouth wrapping itself around a steak would put me right off my dinner, maybe I could ask him to stick a napkin over his head because 'why should I have to look away?'

The general manager is Thomas Kochs email:- [email protected].

Pinkfrocks don't tar all elderly people with your ugly brush. I have many older ladies coming up to me and cooing over my feeding babies ( now I find that a bit much, but smile sweetly)

Some women where I live think nothing - it appears- of showing their breasts in the middle of caffe nero with no attempt at all to be discreet- in fact they sometimes look as if they are seeking attention.

I would bet my house and its contents that this is not true. No woman breastfeeds in public hoping someone has caught sight of her boobs and is staring at them. NO-ONE does that or wants that. Shall I tell you what else? The only reason you're seeing the odd glimpse of nipple as the baby fidgets about is because you are looking for it. You see someone's about to feed and you cannot take your eyes off them, getting all hot under the collar at the opportunity to be "offended". It's a shame you can't be more engaged with whomever you are having your coffee with. I read a comment after that article where someone said "It's so embarrassing, you don't know where to look." Seriously, in a restaurant? You can't find one thing to look at other than the rolled up jumper of a mother feeding her baby? Fucked up world indeed.

As for being sensitive to the outdated views of older people - no thank you! Some people think black people should "go home" and gays should be imprisoned - should I respect those views too? Breasts are for feeding babies. If you have an issue with that, take it up with God. He made us this way.

One of the things that is wrong with the 'modern world' is that people are quick to talk about 'rights' but slow to talk about consideration, manners and sensitivity to others.

Of course women have a 'right' to feed their baby in public but equally it could be argued that people also have a right to have a cuppa without having to watch naked breasts which they may feel embarrassed about- and no, it's not always possible to avert your gaze in a crowded room unless you stare at the floor or turn your chair around.

You have to understand that some people do not want to see naked breasts on display. They have a right to feel like that regardless of whether breast feeding is a normal bodily function.

So is farting- but I do try not to let out a loud and smelly one in company because although it's natural, not everyone wants a whiff of it.

Oh and can I just add that I didn't breastfeed either of my kids past 3 weeks, so I am not one of these women sitting half naked in a cafe squirting milk into the man on the next table's mochaccino while I shout at the top of my lungs about my right to breastfeed in public.

Links to Claridges Twitter and Facebook twitter.com/claridgeshotel
www.facebook.com/claridges

Breasts are for feeding babies.
This is the type of ignorant, bolshie attitude that gives women a bad name.

Breasts are also sexual. They are meant to be. Take that up with God too if it upsets you! Some people ( not me, thanks) find it disturbing and distasteful to watch breastfeeding.

People ought to be more considerate.

Oh pinkfrocks have you got your bingo card out or something?

Why are you comparing breastfeeding to farting?

That's like saying, 'well eating a bowl of pasta is a perfectly natural thing but I wouldn't do it in public because, ya know, you dont fart in public do you?'

Frankly as a rosacea sufferer I'm conscious that the sight of my face is far, far more likely to put people off their food than the sight of a centimetre or two of my (rather lovely) breast. Should I wear a paper bag over my head when I eat out?

So is farting- but I do try not to let out a loud and smelly one in company because although it's natural, not everyone wants a whiff of it.

Did you really just type that? You are a very deluded, insulting person. I think all these imaginary elderly people are actually just figments of your peverted mind.

Well I find your posts disturbing and distasteful, pinkfrocks

pinkfrocks - what do you think a woman should do Then if she is in a cafe enjoying a coffee and then her baby wakes up and starts crying because it is hungry and wants feeding NOW (as babies tend to do, the little buggers!)

I also want to know if it's only elderly people we should consider wrt public breastfeeding, or if men of our own age not liking it (and as I've said before, IME they're far more likely to have issues) is also enough reason to wear a napkin.

so?

I find some of the views here totally selfish and inconsiderate to (mainly) older people who don't want to watch breast feeding where no effort is made to be discreet.

I think some of you need to get out more and you'd be surprised at how many people find it off putting in cafes.

It's fine, absolutely fine to breastfeed in public but most women who have some sense use a shawl or something because they know that not everyone wants to watch.

I have never said not to breastfeed, just be considerate that there are still people out there who do not find it comfortable to watch.

If you find that hard to understand then you have a problem yourselves.