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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Claridges Breastfeeding Policy

638 replies

ifgrandmahadawilly · 02/12/2014 20:31

Aibu in posting this here, in the hopes that the people of mumsnet let Claridges know how unreasonable they are being?

www.telegraph.co.uk/women/womens-health/11267989/Mother-forced-to-cover-up-with-large-napkin-while-breastfeeding-at-Claridges.html

OP posts:
PhaedraIsMyName · 05/12/2014 19:33

Grunt went on about how "shocked" she was. I'm shocked at her inability to see anyone else's point of view.

PhaedraIsMyName · 05/12/2014 19:45

I hink there is a vast difference between being unwilling or unable to breastfeed and feeling revulsion towards breastfeeding. I will never be able to understand the latter

Try using a bit of empathy and imagination. It revolted me that I was nothing more than a bloated, leaky milch cow, constantly feeding day and night unable to leave the house. Try imagining what it feels like to know that as soon as baby clamps on it will hurt, your womb will hurt and there will be a rush of hormones which make you feel sick. So no I don't want to look at beautific pictures of nursing mothers.

And can we please drop the red herring that anyone who is less than thrilled by this is ok with Page 3. Lord knows how many campaigns I've supported to get rid of it.

pommedeterre · 05/12/2014 19:52

phaedra - I'm not a great bf fan, have given it a go x 3 and got totally stuck with it with no 2 which caused some big issues. This is not about bfing though. This is about women and their bodies and how society views us.

tiktok · 05/12/2014 20:19

Oh for goodness sake, Phaedra. Grunt mentioned once she could not understand you. She didn't go on about it. None of that amounts to several people having a go at you.

It's really not about you, you know. I have sympathy with your situation and history but not with the ginormous chip on your shoulder against everyone.

Icimoi · 05/12/2014 20:54

Loving the way Portofino takes all the trouble to come onto this thread just to froth at other people having a froth. If you don't approve of the thread continuing, why contribute to it?

Icimoi · 05/12/2014 20:57

I was another one who said that I have absolutely no problem at all with Phaedra's stance - in fact I absolutely respect her for it, because unlike the Farages of this world she recognises that the issue is solely hers and doesn't expect breastfeeders to hide in corners or under napkins.

BeCool · 05/12/2014 21:35

phaedra I never took exception to you saying BF was a dreadful experience for you.

I said I was shocked yes & I was shocked that a Mum who BF for 3 months would choose to leave a restaurant if another person started to BF. I was shocked at the extreme reaction to a mother feeding her baby, by another mother who BF. I have never heard of such an extreme reaction before and I felt shocked.

That isn't passing any judgement on you. I don't have a problem with your stance - you take responsibility for your feelings and leave. You don't project them onto BF mothers. It is me being shocked at the intensity of a persons negative feelings towards BF being so strong that they would leave a restaurant mid-meal if someone started to BF.

You do seem to be quite angry about it still. You say you don't want to talk about it, but you raised it yourself on this thread. And then you have jumped down the throat of everyone who dares mention it.

I reserve my own right to be shocked by the unique (at least to me) scenario you describe and to respond to your comment on this thread which is discussing women getting a hard time and various reactions from other people while BF in public.

I am really sorry that I have upset you by referring to your post.

At the risk of sounding patronising, and really not wanting to, I genuinely hope that you can find a way to deal with this and be able to get to a better place with your experience as what you are describing sounds both traumatic and lasting.

CruCru · 05/12/2014 21:38

Yes, one of them has told me that I have a big problem. Another has said that if I want to feed a baby in a public place I should ask everyone else if they mind. Ha ha ha ha.

Icimoi · 05/12/2014 22:10

So if one of the people you ask says that they do mind, CruCru, do the men you're debating with reckon that the baby will say "Fair enough, then, I don't mind going hungry if it means you're going to feel offended" and stop crying?

SurfsUp1 · 07/12/2014 22:31

BeCool

If you came on a thread and explained that you had had a horrible experience and it had left you traumatised and unable to be around something that other people found totally normal, and then a poster came along and said that your comment was the "most shocking" thing they had read on the entire thread (especially if the thread contained some horrible stuff) can you see how you might feel rather upset?

ahamill6 · 14/12/2014 16:27

As a new mum, I've got enough to worry about, I shouldn't be shamed as well - that's my point of view anyways: live-style.co.uk/2014/12/04/a-new-mums-point-of-view-on-breastfeeding/

Justgotosleepnow · 14/12/2014 23:00

Sorry but what shame? I just don't get 'shame'
I don't particularly like exposing myself at all, but I have no shame. I don't really understand that

ahamill6 · 15/12/2014 09:31

I said shamed - as in other people trying to make me feel I'm doing something wrong. Not something I feel myself.

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