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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Claridges Breastfeeding Policy

638 replies

ifgrandmahadawilly · 02/12/2014 20:31

Aibu in posting this here, in the hopes that the people of mumsnet let Claridges know how unreasonable they are being?

www.telegraph.co.uk/women/womens-health/11267989/Mother-forced-to-cover-up-with-large-napkin-while-breastfeeding-at-Claridges.html

OP posts:
tiktok · 03/12/2014 23:38

What's with the 'flopping'? Who 'flops'?

Why didn't you switch chairs with your partner on that night? Or is your partner equally unable to just not focus on anything but a bf woman if she is in the vicinity?

MrHardy · 03/12/2014 23:39

tiktok My objection is that it can put people off their meals. A lot of people don't like it and feel it's something that should be done somewhere more discreet. I'm sorry, that's my feeling and if we're giving everyone what they want, shouldn't we respect the feelings of the people who DON'T want to see it?

SurfsUp1 · 03/12/2014 23:39

surely you can understand it's not the nicest thing in the world when you're trying to enjoy food? I know that it would put me off my food.

No I can't!! And frankly why should I care!??

Someone eating with their mouth open is far more off-putting IMHO. Disgusting!! I hate it so I look away. Problem solved.

MrHardy · 03/12/2014 23:40

surfsup1 Mothers definitely haven't been breastfeeding in public for years. Maybe in the comfort of their own homes or a bathroom, but not in wide view of the public.

SurfsUp1 · 03/12/2014 23:40

shouldn't we respect the feelings of the people who DON'T want to see it?

Absolutely not. We need to make sure that these attitudes are stamped out and don't get passed on to future generations.

EmbarrassedPossessed · 03/12/2014 23:40

Oh, enough of the "flopping breasts" comments already. You hardly see anything when a woman breastfeeds and if you do its by accident not intent.

In the situation you describe, McHardy, if it was upsetting you that much then you should have asked to be moved and explained why to the staff so they could seat you somewhere more acceptable for you.

And I really really don't understand people that are offended/upset/repulsed by women breastfeeding. It must be a constant trial for you given how many times you see semi naked breasts in advertising/magazines/etc or is that not the same?

SurfsUp1 · 03/12/2014 23:41

MrHardy sorry, but that's simply not true.

MrHardy · 03/12/2014 23:42

SurfsUp1 it puts me off my food the same way as someone farting or being sick would, sorry - and a lot of people feel that way. I think it's high time we started respecting the views of others instead of having everything revolve around the 'look at me' people.

Writerwannabe83 · 03/12/2014 23:43

I think MrHardy is actually just trying to wind us all up. I can't take anything he says seriously or believe that he thinks what he's saying is ok. He's just stirring I think.

MrHardy · 03/12/2014 23:43

Breasts are lovely, and even as a gay man I can love breasts, but I just don't want to see them when I'm trying to bloody eat! Go somewhere private and have some self respect!

EmbarrassedPossessed · 03/12/2014 23:43

breastfeeding through history...

Writerwannabe83 · 03/12/2014 23:44

How are BF mother's "a Look at me" type of person anyway?

CountBapula · 03/12/2014 23:44

I think anyone who is repulsed or put off their food by the sight of a baby being fed has, erm, ishoos.

HangingInAGruffaloStance · 03/12/2014 23:46

I hate the sight of people drinking tea. People who drink tea should understand that we don't want to see their disgusting show off behaviour, swinging their tea bags around and scattering sugar everywhere.

I insist that tea drinkers should partake in the comfort of a toilet, or at the very least inside a duvet cover. If they don't, they are selfish and inconsiderate.

I have no hang ups and don't need therapy/ a kick up the arse.

Writerwannabe83 · 03/12/2014 23:47

Self respect means to be proud of oneself and I'm pretty sure most BF'ing mothers are.

SurfsUp1 · 03/12/2014 23:47

Breasts are lovely, and even as a gay man I can love breasts, but I just don't want to see them when I'm trying to bloody eat! Go somewhere private and have some self respect!

You know there are people out there who find gay men disgusting don't you? WHo find it hard to eat knowing there are gay men in the room with them?
Should you maybe leave because you're making them feel uncomfortable?
Hmm - didn't think so.

MrHardy · 03/12/2014 23:48

EmbarrassedPossessed I never said it didn't happen, just that it wasn't as widely accepted as it is now. Personally, I don't like it and think people should just go somewhere private out of respect for people who don't want to see it.

WriterWannabe83 they're look at me in the way that they have to make a big thing out of being asked a simple request for the benefit and comfort of others.

CountBapula I don't have issues, but just like if I saw someone shitting on the table next to me, it puts me off my food.

I just don't get what the problem is with the rule by Claridge's. Alton Towers have banned speedos at their water parks and you don't see me complaining, do you? No, because it's their rules and even though I'd love to wear one I respect their rules!

MrHardy · 03/12/2014 23:50

SurfUp1 Yes, people are disgusted by gay people and that's their choice. However, I wouldn't start snogging my boyfriend and humping his leg in front of everyone in the restaurant, so they probably wouldn't even know my sexual preferences (BECAUSE I KEEP IT PRIVATE!)

SurfsUp1 · 03/12/2014 23:51

So if Alton Towers banned gays that would be fine with you too?
Or maybe if they simply asked you to pretend to be straight?

Icimoi · 03/12/2014 23:51

Come off it, Mr Hardy, the woman wasn't breastfeeding throughout your meal, was she? And if she was directly behind your partner, you wouldn't have been able to see her at all without shifting round to the side.

And you certainly didn't see a flopping breast. At most you would have seen the baby's head and a small portion of the mother's breast. Why not concentrate on your partner and your food, anyway?

Writerwannabe83 · 03/12/2014 23:52

I didn't think anyone humped people's legs in restaurants regardless of sexual preference?

DecaffCoffeeAndRollupsPlease · 03/12/2014 23:52

A cover is a horrible idea. I would never have covered my baby's head while feeding as she wouldn't have found it comfortable. Why should babies have to be uncomfortable? Imagine if people were covering over baby's heads and faces with clothes while they were lying in their prams, the parents would be accused of child cruelty, yet this shop thinks it's better to inflict that on a baby than to ignore their own or customer's prejudices- horrible.

TerraNovice · 03/12/2014 23:53

Gay man is freaked out by breastfeeding, big surprise. I've encountered many a gay man who feels that way. But funny, when one of them gets told to stop kissing their partner in a pub or restaurant then we all have to jump to protest on their behalf! Hypocrisy much?

(Note: If people, gay or straight, want to snog in pubs That's fine and it doesn't bother me. I just wanted to point out the hypocrisy.)

Icimoi · 03/12/2014 23:53

Mr Hardy, if a waiter came up to you and said someone at another table didn't want to look at gay people and you should both cover yourselves with tablecloths, would you think that was OK?

EmbarrassedPossessed · 03/12/2014 23:54

I'm extremely grateful that you are not in a position to be making or changing the law in this regards, MrHardy. Fortunately what you think is of very very little significance.

I am sure you won't be interested, but the person who needs the most consideration in these situations is the baby. Not adults who can choose to look away, move, or leave if something is happening that they don't like.