Not to buy my DD christmas presents?

[puds11isNAUGHTYnotNAICE]

Curious, based on a thread about how much people spend per child.

DD is 6. We have never bought her a christmas present aside from a helium balloon (she loves them). She is the only grandchild/niece or nephew in the family, therefore gets an inordinate amount of gifts from family members big family

AIBU not to buy her anything from me?

Given what you've said I don't think it's unreasonable. Get her something nice at a different time when she'll notice and appreciate that it's from you.

I cant help feeling a bit jealous . I find Xmas present buying a hassle, expensive and I dislike the obligatory buying of crap noone needs just because custom dictates that's what we have to do.

Tbh it sounds like your parents take over a bit - don't you want to do that magical stuff for her?

I think it's a bit odd. Stuff doesn't = love but giving is one if the five languages of love.

All I would say is will she be getting what she has asked for from her family? Will she want to know why her letter to Santa wasn't read?!

^ This

Other than that, I don't see anything wrong with it at all. If she gets loads of stuff from family members AND still believes in Father Christmas then she's not really going to know. I buy my kids quite a lot for Christmas, but nothing wildly expensive, just lots of nice things I know they'll like and not get shoved to the back of the cupboard after a week and also do a stocking each. I normally buy things throughout the year and then when they've done their Santa lists I buy them something off that too.

My family is quite small though - just my mum and my sister on my side that buy presents for them (and they don't spend more than £20 per child) and on hubby's side barely anyone bothers, not even MIL who is a real tightwad so I make sure my kids do have some nice things. If I had a big family like yours, OP, who also loved to buy presents for my children, then I would probably not really buy them much either. I don't think you are BU at all! I like the idea of a Christmas treat/trip. The Nutcracker would be a lovely one :)

Marion she speaks to relatives on the phone saying thank you for the present. It gets so confusing with people trying to get her to open certain things first or her opening things whilst I'm looking at something else it all ends up in chaos. I have tried and failed with christmas thank you lists every year so just have to do generic thankyous.

Waith I buy for my parents and occasionally my sisters although we decide nearer the time if we can afford it or not.

Harold

I see the MN competitive frugality is out in full force already. I can't imagine never buying my own child a Christmas gift yet happily accepting from others. How does she say thank you if she doesn't know who they are from?

Children ask at school re what did your mum/dad get you for Christmas, I can't imagine she looks forward to saying nothing.

Still my family contact me in the run up to christmas to see what she wants.

We do 'magical' stuff, I just don't see the gifts as magical. We go to see santa and go to a carol concert every year. We also go and see a christmas film at some point in december and do tree decorating etc.

Congratulations op. Woo hoo! Tightest parent award is yours!!!!

Why should you spend out as for Certs everyone else will...?

All I can say is, thank god someone values your 'baby'.

And you're not in my family.

I don't think Yabu, as someone else said presents do not equal love, if she is secure and loved and happy, and gets tons of presents from family, then I don't think she's doing badly at all!

Daisy see above. Also with the 'what did you get' they are still quite young so I don't think the competitive presents thing is an issue yet.

I really don't associate valuing my child with throwing gifts at her

I have also stated that when the presents from family decrease, I will buy her gifts.

The stocking is magical

Lmao at "how can we undercut you OP, you've started with nothing!"

Bang on boomtownsuprise
OP - YAB very U

Why post in Aibu? You clearly 'know' you're not...

My son gets 30 gifts just from my mum. Only grandchild you see.

Then has gifts from his dad, grandma, my dad, my grandparents and my friends.

His birthday is also 3 weeks before Xmas so the amount of toys I end up with is stupid!

I' don't buy him a lot at all due to this. Cheap lego sets, DVD and a main present which is a Wii this year.

The shit thing is all these gifts end up in my house!

I really enjoy getting my dc presents. I love choosing them, wrapping them and knowing that they will love whatever it is. They also get masses of gifts from my small family. I don't particularly see a problem with it.
If DS (3)gets bored of opening gifts we just leave them till later or when he wants to open them whereas dd (17) would open gifts all day

I spend about £200 on each normally, my mum spends about the same and my sis spends about half that on each of them (this year I've spent more on dd and quite a bit less on DS as I got some really great bargains!) I specifically save for this every year and I wouldn't change it.

They also don't get stuff throughout the year except for birthdays so are not spoiled. I've had years where money was extremely tight (before DS) and I've only managed about £50 for dd. She still had an amazing Christmas and loved what I got her,with no whining about things she didn't get.

I'd really miss not picking my dc gifts out myself.

I love doing my children's stockings and there's no way I would be letting my mum or MIL take that over - they had their turn years ago.

My DC have always done well for presents from family members but I am the one who knows them best and tend to get them what they really want or need rather than a generic pile of 'crap'.

I think it's sad for you as well as your DD that you don't get to have those experiences.

I can assure you at 6 she is not too young to be discussing what she wants for Christmas and what she had after, heard several conversations already with young children.

Don't see the need to post if you are so certain you are right. Just carry on letting others ensure your DD has a christmas and gifts to open and commend yourself on keeping your money to yourself.

Same Eat we are trapped under piles of toys, most of which she shows no interest in!

Didn't you do this exact same thread in the christmas topic last year OP? I think the responses were generally mixed then, so why rehash the same old thing?

I'm only getting him the Wii for his birthday so Santa can buy him games for Xmas.

I felt like a genius when I had that idea

Daisy you are assuming that I have money and that I then keep this money to myself!

Even those that are skint can get something...

Sort out the toys she already, restrict the piles of tat presents from family members (you can request this you know). Then buy her a gift from you, however small, however token (if you can't afford much) and something she would like. The gesture means a lot.
As it stands I think it's more than a bit off.

Is there competitive frugality on the thread? Lovely. I must go back and read!

Well do a Christmas eve present. We do one in our house and it has things like, pj's (bad taste Christmas ones ) a dvd that we can all watch together snuggled up, a small Christmas wish bear, chocolates ect