Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

To have told a woman to take her shivering child home to bed in Primark

742 replies

BigRedBall · 05/11/2014 17:55

I went out today to get a few bits and bobs and ended up in a Primark. Got to the lifts and saw a woman waiting with a pushchair and on it was hanging a school bag. Looked to her side and she had a school aged child with her who was visibly ill, shivering, moaning. I assumed she'd picked him up from school and was dropping by on way home, but then realised school bag was from a school other side of town.

We went up together and the boy was whimpering now and looked really bad. The mother didn't seem to notice/care.

So I was walking around and the tanoy went off asking for a store cleaner to go to "area bla bla bla" for a clean up. Didn't really take any notice until I walked to the other side of the shop and the same woman was standing there with a now crying baby in pushchair and crying/ shivering child who had been sick all over the shop floor. There were splatters of pink sick on clothes, the mirrors, it was disgusting and she was stood there on the phone to someone and was telling the boy off.

I don't know about anyone else, but when my children get ill and shiver like that with fever, the last thing I'd do is traipse them across town. I'd give them a hug and put them in bed and hold their head if they were being sick. Goodness knows vomiting is draining even for an adult.

I felt so angry for the poor boy. So I walked up to her and said "instead of bringing him to the shops from school, you should've taken him home to bed. I'd take him straight home and give the poor thing a hug".

I think she was more shocked than anything.

DH thinks I wbu and is shocked I'd say that to someone. I don't think I am. Also, I now feel sick and think I have his germs.

OP posts:
HaroldLloyd · 05/11/2014 23:20

OI ALL OF YOU stop barfing and hug something.

theposterformallyknownas · 05/11/2014 23:21

Seems like a few of us have had friends called Hughie and ralph.

motherofmonster · 05/11/2014 23:23

Ah 20/20 many different flavours that tasted the same..i was very fond of the kiwi one
..it was not however fond of me Grin

HaroldLloyd · 05/11/2014 23:24

Ah, mad dog. I have suffered at it's hands too.

Ir1na · 05/11/2014 23:25

Irina, I was on a works night out when there was a big fight at the other end of the pub. As I worked there I went down to see if I could help and because I'm nosy. There was a bloke lying on the floor face down. He was drenched in blood and completely silent. There was another bloke stood over him swinging a bar stool over his head and hitting the man with it. People were just stood watching. I pushed the man aside and he fell over. My boss grabbed the stool off him. He came back and started trying to stamp on the mans head. I shielded him with my body. He kept trying to drag me away by my hair but I held on tight. Eventually 3 blokes pinned him down outside to wait for the police. As I turned the bloke over I noticed that his ear was beneath him on the floor. I screamed for some ice and clean bar towels. I picked it up and put it in the ice. Sadly it couldn't be saved. I didn't know it but I was pregnant with ds ( my eldest). Maybe subconsciously I felt the need to protect someone so defenceless? Anyway what we didn't know at the time was that there was a man with two broken legs in the toilet. This man went on an unprovoked rampage. He was a well known criminal and people advised me against it but I went to court. Out of a pub full of witnesses only 2 were willing to stand up for a stranger against some psychopathic chancer. I told the people who were trying to convince me not to testify that if something so horrific ever happened to a loved one how much would they appreciate someone standing up for them?

WOW!! Smile Smile That's a different situation though, I would expect anyone to 'interfere' (although not necessarily put themselves in danger) because it's serious/life threatening!
If someone was badly injured, even if they told me to fuck off, I would call 999 and keep an eye on the situation from a distance until police/ambulance got there. Ordinary stuff not so much, might ask if they're okay incase though.

sharonthewaspandthewineywall · 05/11/2014 23:25

Ahhh I often talked to Hughie and Ralph on the big white telephone to god!

Karenthetoadslayer · 05/11/2014 23:25

Hi BigRedBall I do admire your unabated chuzpe! Flowers

I didn't quite agree with the apple cart story, but in this case I am 100% backing you up for all it's worth. Smile

motherofmonster · 05/11/2014 23:26

Mad dog Grin. Ah the hazen memories of yesteryear

Jolleigh · 05/11/2014 23:27

OP - countrymummy is a shining example of why in these situations you either be helpful or keep your mouth shut.

countrymummy Thanks for you.

Darkandstormynight · 05/11/2014 23:28

I'd feel awful for the little one but I would not have said anything. In the back of my mind I always think the little ones would somehow end up bearing the brunt of that woman's anger (towards OP), and not OP herself.

You know, not making a bad situation worse - for the child.

OraProNobis · 05/11/2014 23:29

I don't think there's anything to admire about the OPs 'chutzpah' really. I would hope that by the time this thread ends she MIGHT possibly have learned that very often things are not what they seem and that keeping one's counsel until absolutely certain is much much wiser than gobbing off.

Jolleigh · 05/11/2014 23:29

Stop barfing and hug something! Grin I am dying!!

OraProNobis · 05/11/2014 23:30

Oh - and let me join in the Flowers for CountryMummy whose very dignified post nearly made me cry a bit.

Karenthetoadslayer · 05/11/2014 23:32

Thank you for correcting my translation mistake, Ora. Us forinners will never learn proper English. Grin

wickedlazy · 05/11/2014 23:34

OP I know you had the best intentions at heart, but I can't help but think she would maybe shout at the child more e.g "look what you've done I have strangers telling me off because of you".

I know what's done is done, but if something similar happened again maybe say to the child "Pet, are you not feeling very well? You poor dote" then to the mum "awk god help him, he must feel rotten". Showing sympathy/empathy might have made the mum look at the child in a different light, i.e "oh he really does look rotten, maybe I was a bit harsh.

Ir1na · 05/11/2014 23:35

CountryMummy1 Sad Thanks What did people say in your situation?

wickedlazy · 05/11/2014 23:38

I know you said to "give the poor thing a hug" but it you were rude before that with "you should've..."

OraProNobis · 05/11/2014 23:41

Karen I didn't mean for my spelling of the word to indicate disapproval of yours Smile. For all I know yours could be the proper Hebrew spelling. Or something.

RudePepper · 05/11/2014 23:43

If your assumptions are right fair enough. She may have been buying nightwear for a dying parent for all you know though.

Ir1na · 05/11/2014 23:44

wickedlazy LOL, do people seriously not mistake you for a perv? Blush

Thebodynowchillingsothere · 05/11/2014 23:50

Did the doctor on here say she wasn't paid to be nice???!!! Wow. Let me join her list please.

Op you were unreasonable first and last.

gobbynorthernbird · 05/11/2014 23:53

I had really important stuff to say here, but am now too busy trying not to to throw up in my own mouth at the mere mention of 20/20.

OP, YWBU

CountryMummy1 · 05/11/2014 23:55

Ir1na - a very kindly assistant helped me mop everything up, got me lots of kitchen roll and even gave me a towel from out the back to put in the car incase little one was sick again. Another one played with my older child and gave her a packet of Percy Pigs.

I hadn't managed to even purchase the nightie at this point so I explained the situation and she took it to the counter for me so I could bypass the queue.

I got their names and sent them a thank you letter once everything had settled down a month later.

motherofmonster · 05/11/2014 23:58

The next time i see 20/20 in the shops in going to have to buy it too see if it is as bad as i remember... I will put it in a wine glass though... Much more sophisticated than out the bottle in the park Grin

ThisBitchIsResting · 06/11/2014 00:03

MN is a parallel planet sometimes, this thread is bonkers.

OP YANBU at all, people are tying themselves in knots to make the woman a saint when you describe it perfectly well and if she had collected an ill child from school because he was too ill to be in school, she was negligent as his carer for not taking him immediately home. You have made it clear it was clothes and accessories in her basket, not essentials, and that he was upset and clearly ill and she was ignoring this.

No idea why so many posters are piling in on you but kudos to you for continuing to post in humour and grace!

Swipe left for the next trending thread