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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Any other Mums refusing to take the kids out trick or treating?

244 replies

Theboulderhascaughtupwithme · 31/10/2014 08:37

Just wondering if I totally mean/unreasonable. We do a lot for/ with the kids, clubs, weekend days out, doing stuff at home etc etc but I just cannot muster any enthusiasm for taking me out trick or treating. I find the whole concept of trawling round the houses letting them beg for sweets cringe worthy.

Strangely I have no problem with other kids coming to ors and always have some sweet etc ready for them which makes me feel I am being a bit unreasonable.

Also I don't want to fork out on costumes and I am totally not able or into making them.

So I guess I am giving myself permission to just not do even tho my eldest particularly has been keen and asking to go.

What's other people's stance?

OP posts:
PiperIsOrangePumpkins · 31/10/2014 16:12

It's not begging.

DC are going trick or treating and I'm also doing a party. It's fun.

We always observe the signs saying no trick or treaters and I make sure DC says thank you.

annabanana19 · 31/10/2014 16:13

No never. Hate halloween.

NickiFury · 31/10/2014 16:16

They went for the first time last year and ex took them.

He's away this year so it's down to me. I'm not exactly thrilled about it but dc are very excited and have fab costumes and it's not all about me so I will make the effort. It's only for an hour.

It's not begging. People say that because they don't want to do it, so referring to it as that makes them feel better about not bothering.

MajesticWhine · 31/10/2014 16:16

I'm not that keen on halloween because it was never a thing when I was a child. But I will stay in and do the door opening tonight. DH taking our littlest one out. I have got a ton of sweets for visitors. And a bottle of wine for myself.

ArtDecoGhoulie · 31/10/2014 16:32

I live in a semi rural ex mining village in the north east. Nobody round my area decorates their house. Does this mean I won't get visitors? I have sweets bagged up, ready...

SmellyFartado · 31/10/2014 16:49

Thank god for this thread. I fucking hate Halloween with a passion. Commercialised excuse for begging despite what some posters are saying.

We won't be going out nor will we be answering the door. If I had my way, we'd go out for a meal but the DC are tired and DH can't be arsed going back out. Took the DC out today and there was a guy on the high street with a clipboard for something or other dressed as a zombie with loads of fake blood down his face, plastic barbed wire round his neck, hamming it the fuck up - really scared the kids and that was midday today. Was totally inappropriate and more reason to fucking hate it.

TheHatInTheCat · 31/10/2014 16:56

I took my ds for the first time last year and he absolutely loved it, talked about nothing else for weeks.
It's not really about you and how you feel awkward, it's a fun, exciting thing for kids to do and I think your being miserable.
Feel sorry for your kids really.

TheRealAmandaClarke · 31/10/2014 16:58

Yanbu. You must do as you see fit.
Personally I love for kids to call and to give them sweets at Halloween. And this is the first year I will take my 2 out to a few neighbour's doors to T&T.
But its Ok not to want to.

QuillPen · 31/10/2014 17:01

No, I don't take my children (4&7) out. They do, however, really enjoy the children coming to our house and giving them sweets. And they have never asked to go.

They do have outfits (as have been to a friends house to a Halloween 'party' - just playing whilst dressed up really).

And they are having spooky tea too. Just not knocking on neighbours doors begging...

Bloodybridget · 31/10/2014 17:02

I've just put my notice on the front door ("Knock if you dare!") and a few tea lights on the window ledge. Some years we've had quite a few callers, sometimes none. I rather like the idea of children "daring" to approach strange adults - obviously properly supervised, if they're very young - these days when kids generally are so enclosed in their nuclear families.

soverylucky · 31/10/2014 17:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Fairylea · 31/10/2014 17:03

Nope, hate Halloween. Hate all of it. Have never gone trick or treating myself and will never be taking the kids. Ever.

I always put a sign on the door saying no trick or treaters thanks and just can't wait for it to be over.

.

law7988 · 31/10/2014 17:05

Absolutely 'No' to 'trick or treat'. Two main reasons:

  1. It's largely Americanimported in the late 1970's
  2. It is encouraging 'Occult activities' which MSM(mainstrem media) are very keen to push.
Much better to celebrate 'All Saints day' PS. The idea children should knock on 'strangers' doors is bizarre any way. Why would anyone do it? Much better to have a good fireworks night with explosions and pretty colours :)
MrsDeVere · 31/10/2014 17:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MyGhostIsFlummoxed · 31/10/2014 17:26

Hallowe'en is encouraging 'occult activities'? Now I know the world has gone mad Confused

It's just a bit of fun, if you don't want to participate, fine but don't spoil it for everyone else.

(I know, I know, shouldn't have clicked!)

HopeClearwater · 31/10/2014 17:30

Unlicensed begging, that's what it is! And in light of tabloid hysteria about paedophilia, why would you suddenly change the rules about approaching strangers for sweets.

If you say 'Trick' instead of immediately handing out the sweets, the children look at you as if you've just been beamed down from Planet Zog.

All the sheeple getting their kids outfits and makeup and decorating the house inside and out... make sure you do just what all your friends do, don't be different!

HopeClearwater · 31/10/2014 17:32

I was intrigued about the mainstream media encouraging occult activities though. Pray explain... I thought the mainstream media restricted their interests to benefit claimants and immigrants.

cricketpitch · 31/10/2014 17:43

MrsdeVere has said what I feel too. I echo other posters who say thanks for the thread. I hate Halloween as it is now and have been made to feel guilty as I had the impression that I was the only one not doing it.

My kids are otherwise fine and we all do different things with our families.

BeattieBow · 31/10/2014 17:50

I don't particularly feel strongly about it either way, but my dcs say it is their second favourite day of the year (after Christmas). They love the whole pumpkin carving, decorating business. (we usually make slime and cakes etc too) and they like trick or treating. The older ones are both going to parties this year too. So I do it because they love it, because our community all does it, and because they have such fun.

I think its a bigger deal at all ages now - young people go out dressed as zombies etc, all the pubs near us are doing something and there were lots of parties last year too (not that I was invited to any!).

Itsfab · 31/10/2014 17:52

My kids have costumes as needed them for something or other but they have never been out and I don't do anything other than put up some bat lights and buy green crème eggs. The boys trick or treated with me and chose treat - hand in a bag, picked out a crème egg. Done. Boys happy.

No one has been around yet and we will not answer. Have seen two neighbours with pumpkins out. I think we had one knock last year but everyone else knows not to bother now and I know my next door neighbours ignore too.

Just don't like it. Scary masks. Tight budget to be buying stuff and DH feels very strongly it is begging by menaces.

I went once as a kid and tied a gate shut with a piece of string. Daren't knock on the door so pointless really and I was worried I would be in a lot of trouble.

Brams · 31/10/2014 17:53

I make sure near neighbours with SMALL children know I have sweets and will be glad to see them early in the evening. Have just seen 2yr old vampire & 4yr old wizard from next door & given them sweets. Otherwise doors not answered from about 7.30 as those will be older uninvited children. The supermarket today was almost entirely staffed by ghouls, zombies etc, some of them with horrible fake injuries which I would think frightening for young children. I certainly thought they were very tasteless, so hopped back in car and went to nice safe middle class supermarket without zombies etc instead. All I remember from my childhood was bobbing for apples, no pumpkins and certainly not spending a bomb on crap costumes which seems to be the norm. Every year seems to get more hysterical. But each to their own. (Will tidy up left over sweets - can't have them lying around) (fat chance!)

Ionacat · 31/10/2014 17:54

I personally don't let my DD go and I don't answer the door or I do and the parents get an earful for ignoring the sign. Whilst, I'm sure that mumsnetters do stick to the rules, you have to remember that a significant minority don't and they do cause significant distress especially amongst the vulnerable in the community. My sister had a firework through the letter box one year when they didn't answer the door, thankfully she's now moved.

NoMarymary · 31/10/2014 17:56

DSIS takes the family to ikea for the evening as trick or treat drives her mad and ikea is completely empty!

RufusTheReindeer · 31/10/2014 17:58

Pumpkin has been out for 20 mins

Doorbell has gone three times with some of the smallest trick or treaters at the door

Dad - what do you say
Tiny one - thank you
Dad - no...trick or treat
Tiny one - TRICK OR TREAT!!!

Fabulous46 · 31/10/2014 18:04

I always come to visit my sister at Samhain. I live rurally so we don't get guisers. She does, therefore, I go down to see the wee ones with my chocolate and toffee apples as well as Halloween goodie bags. It'll be back up to mine at 7.30 for a Harvest/Samhain party with friends where well have loads to eat and plenty of wine where we will happily "encourage occult activities."