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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Any other Mums refusing to take the kids out trick or treating?

244 replies

Theboulderhascaughtupwithme · 31/10/2014 08:37

Just wondering if I totally mean/unreasonable. We do a lot for/ with the kids, clubs, weekend days out, doing stuff at home etc etc but I just cannot muster any enthusiasm for taking me out trick or treating. I find the whole concept of trawling round the houses letting them beg for sweets cringe worthy.

Strangely I have no problem with other kids coming to ors and always have some sweet etc ready for them which makes me feel I am being a bit unreasonable.

Also I don't want to fork out on costumes and I am totally not able or into making them.

So I guess I am giving myself permission to just not do even tho my eldest particularly has been keen and asking to go.

What's other people's stance?

OP posts:
tiggytape · 31/10/2014 09:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ChickenMe · 31/10/2014 09:37

You don't have to do it. I never did it as a child and am not scarred for life. However, it's clearly a bigger thing now so there is more pressure to do it - unfortunately just another pressure to resist if you don't like it. You're the parent so don't feel guilty.

HaroldLloyd · 31/10/2014 09:38

No one does it round by me, I even buy sweets ready and there a are no knocks at all. So even if DS wanted to I wouldn't really want to take him.

Is there a Halloween thing on anywhere you can take them instead. That's what I'll do I think.

fromparistoberlin73 · 31/10/2014 09:40

its a complete PITA but mine begged me.....sigh

Minikievs · 31/10/2014 09:41

I don't want to do it. I never did as a child and I feel exactly the same as you-no problem with people coming to us, but find the thought of going ourselves cringey. So I am staying in with baby and DH is taking our eldest out. DH doesn't want to go either but one if us has to!

LineRunner · 31/10/2014 09:42

I think that children and younger teenagers can have just as much fun answering the door and giving out the sweets, tbh.

At least that's what I'm telling my lot.

MindReader · 31/10/2014 09:44

I loathe the concept of 'Trick or Treating' and how commercial Halloween is.

However, I have friends who are (evangelical?) Christians who are vehemently opposed to Halloween (considering it devil worship) and who wont let their teens read Harry Potter for the same reasons, which I think is OTT.

My two got sweatshirt fabric onesies with a glow in the dark skeleton on (cartoony rather than scary) to wear and we have decorations up in the house (spooky spiders and bats). One went to the school disco last night and one chose not to. I was glad they didn't turn up covered in blood and gore the way some of the littlies did - one carrying her decomposing 'baby' in a coffin too - yuk!

They have both been invited 'guising' tonight with friends - it will be around 6pm in 1 local street where all the children will simply call on each others houses and collect sweeties and think themselves very grown up and clever Grin

Venticoffeecup · 31/10/2014 09:45

Not going, not answering the door!

bodhranbae · 31/10/2014 09:47

DC have no interest thankfully.

Hate the shitty orange and black tat from Wallmart definition of Halloween that has been imported from the US which has redefined this time of year in the UK.
We like the British folk tradition stuff. Carved turnips as Jack-a-Lanterns and not sodding pumpkins.

We live in the arse end of nowhere too which helps.

WhoKnowsWhereTheSlimeGoes · 31/10/2014 09:52

I used to think like that, the DCs liked opening the door to all the ones that came to us and I thought that would be enough. Then they realised that most of the ones coming to us were their friends from school, so of course they wanted to join in so I caved in and now we all love it. We stick to the "houses with pumpkins only" rule and it is fine, lots of people round here do it and it has a really good community feel. In fact although I understand the argument about not taking sweets from strangers etc, I think it has the beneficial effect of people getting to know their neighbours better. Some of the older people round here participate very enthusiastically, they clearly love having young children come to their door.

Costumes don't cost much, we have made the same things last for several years by either buying big in the first place or just adding a few accessories to black tops and leggings.

Flexibilityisaghost · 31/10/2014 09:53

DS won't be doing it, this year or any other. I hate it!

Bluetone · 31/10/2014 10:05

Oh fgs it's not begging. If you don't want to do it then don't. No one has a gun to your head.

It's a tradition. One I grew up with and my dc's love it. They don't knock on strangers doors. We live in a smallish village, everyone does it. All the blood, gore and scary costumes are part of it, I certainly wasn't scarred by it when I was young.

Each to their own.

WellnowImFucked · 31/10/2014 10:15

I'm very SadSadSadSadSadSadSadSad

Thanks to work I haven't been able to go shopping and buy Halloween decorations, can't use last years due to a cat incident. (Don't ask, cat is old and I think either a little demented or just plain evil)

I for one will be really upset if I don't get any kids at the door (yes I'm weird blah blah) but I don't have DC, the DN's are all teenagers and far too cool. . . .

And I miss seeing littles dressed up, so cute and so happy at getting sweets and so chuffed if they've got scarey outfits on and you pretend to be scared.
I love it.

I get that not everyone does but just saying I actually look forward to it. I was particularly popular the year it was bitterly cold and as well as sweets I offered Mums/Dads/Adult Chaperones coffee (with an optional tot of brandy).

I'm planning to do a run in to local supermarket to grab what I can, but knowing them all they'll have is Christmas stuff. Will a snowman decoration on the front door cut it?

WellnowImFucked · 31/10/2014 10:16

Or will I be the weird neighbor who has their Christmas decorations up already?

fatlazymummy · 31/10/2014 10:16

I did it when my kids were younger. I don't participate now. We seem to have the 'only knock when the house is decorated' rule around our way so the whole thing passes me by.
Do what you want though, they're your kids Smile. Celebrating Halloween isn't compulsory.

Notso · 31/10/2014 10:28

When I was little we carved a swede or turnip lantern, dressed up in a bin bag cape and went trick or treating. We also had Halloween decorations including a gigantic inflatable spider that you put a torch in to make it's eyes light up. I loved it, so I do the same with my children except we grow pumpkins and they have bought costumes.
We stick to the rule of decorated houses only and it's mostly people we know.

If you don't like it don't do it but it does seem to be rubbing your kids noses in it to welcome other trick or treaters.

fatlazymummy · 31/10/2014 10:36

wellnow try your nearest pound land or 99p shop. They probably have enough Halloween decs to fill an aircraft hangar.

stephanielittl7 · 31/10/2014 10:40

Hate it all really. DS has sn and cant cope with the constant knocking on the door and all the scary costumes Sad I put up a sign asking people not to knock for above reasons but some dont get it. What really gets me is some of the kids in my area who come knocking on the door are the same ones who think its really funny to pick on my son! Angry

ScreamEggsAndHam · 31/10/2014 10:45

Oh fgs it's not begging

Going round knocking on strangers doors expecting sweets.

Or middle aged, homeless people going round knocking on strangers doors asking for and expecting food.

Both begging. Just because it's some sweet little cherub dressed up as a pumpkin or a cute witch it's automatically deemed as acceptable? Hmm

Ragwort · 31/10/2014 10:51

I have never 'encouraged' my DS (now 12) to go trick or treating and he has only actually asked to go once when he was 10 and DH took him, he came to his own decision that he didn't really like it.

I don't particularly like it but have got sweets in for tonight and will happily give them out and hope some are left for me. We've carved a nice big pumpkin that is on the door step.

motherofmonster · 31/10/2014 11:10

Most of the houses round here take part and decorate the outside of their house. But all of the kids ive seen out stick to the doors that are decorated so i wouldn't think it is begging if it is obvious that the home owners are joining in. But i suppose we are lucky that we are a small estate and most of us know each other and most of the kids are at the same school

StillStayingClassySanDiego · 31/10/2014 11:12

I've never taken mine to do it, they're older teens now and tbh I don't recall them ever asking to do it.

We used to do Halloween parties and decorate the house, that was always fun!

ArabellaTarantella · 31/10/2014 11:19

I've nearly got Bingo: I've got 'begging' and I've got 'sweets and strangers'. Come on folks, don't disappoint.

Bluetone · 31/10/2014 11:19

Scream

But it's a tradition. People know what date it is. If they don't want to participate they don't have to open the door. Homeless people knocking on doors isn't even comparable, that's not a tradition.

motherofmonster · 31/10/2014 11:22

Arrabella.. Don't forget to add demanding with menace onto the bingo card Grin

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