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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be lying awake worrying about this?

51 replies

Lovedmywildway · 25/10/2014 02:47

I've been a sahm since having ds. He's 5 and a half and in year 1. He started a new school in September and is just settling in.

I've been offered a job but it will mean him going to before school club from 8am ish. I'm feeling really anxious about it. Really anxious. The before school club let the children onto the playground at 8.40 (bell goes 8.50) and the children just join everyone else but no one seems to watch them. The gate is open at this point with parents coming and going and it's a really busy road.
I'm worrying because if ds escaped (it's probably unlikely he's car sensible) how would anyone notice? I might not know until I got a text from the school saying he wasn't there and I won't be able to check my phone much in my new job so it could be lunchtime before I knew.
And also it's breaking my heart to think of his little 5 year old self going and lining up on the playground with no one to hug or kids him. Most of the mothers are sahm (they mainly have younger children still at home) and I think there's only two others in his class who use before school club. So he will see everyone else's mommy hugging goodbye and his wont be there.

Tell me to get a grip...I know lots of people have to do this and he's 5 not a baby but I'm finding it such a wrench. The thought of him all alone in the playground makes me want to cry.
I'm feeling hugely hugely guilty. And I can't sleep. I haven't been to sleep at all yet I've just lay here worrying. I was really pleased when I was offered the job but now I just feel awful for ds. I think if they didn't let them out on the playground I would feel much better. It's the letting them back out when everyone else's parents are there and the gate is still open. I know I'm going to want to ring the school to check he's made it back in ok for registrar! They must have some sort of proper system where he couldn't just disappear mustn't they???

OP posts:
YellowBellow · 25/10/2014 10:14

That scenario sounds less than ideal and I think it sounds completely inappropriate. The playground situation I mean, not going back to work. Even if they have a staff member watching they are asking too much to be able to watch kids running around, during the chaos of parents coming in (and potentially distracting them by talking etc) with an open gate. If someone is watching from the inside, that's worse..giving the runaway child a head start. I couldn't be convinced by the risk management plan for that scenario. It's too complacent and sloppy for children of this age. Just because it's been fine up to now, doesn't mean it will always be. You do need to discuss it and put forward your reservations, don't be afraid to stand up to your convictions. I have good reasons for being so forthright on this subject, but don't want to say more in case I out myself. Just take it from me, schools can be very sloppy, in certain areas....even outstanding ones, that are regarding to be the best in a very large city....as in my case.

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