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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Nanny sick leave

229 replies

pommedeterre · 22/10/2014 09:54

As succinctly as possible - nanny doing three days a week for just over a year for pre schooler and toddler. All fine except bit crap at food and bit pestery for me to use her nail business.

I go on a version of mat leave for four months. Keep paying her and she helps with complicated nursery and school runs and takes toddler out. She goes in for routine operation, books two weeks off. Will now be longer as still poorly. Fine. Obviously paying her normal wage still, ok with that, grateful in fact for lucky timing with mat leave.
Except now i discover that when she felt better ten days in she babysat for someone else (then felt bad again meaning it will be more than two weeks).

Aibu in thinking she should have used her bit of energy to help me (just one school run would be awesome to be fair) rather than trying to make an extra £40???

OP posts:
TheLovelyBoots · 22/10/2014 10:29

You are PAYING her during sick leave and she's working for someone else?

I could possibly accept a night-time sitting job where she's there in case of a fire, but I'd still feel a bit taken advantage of.

A school run? You've got to be kidding me.

Original poster
pommedeterre · 22/10/2014 10:30

outraged - complicated because of frequency and having a newborn. Her covering one would be same mileage as to sitting job and would be in day.

OP posts:
Teeb · 22/10/2014 10:30

Id consider it gross misconduct to be claiming sick pay from my employer while accepting paid work elsewhere (untaxed cash in hand work too) are you happy with her in every other way?

DiaDuit · 22/10/2014 10:30

And when did she do the babysitting?

Original poster
pommedeterre · 22/10/2014 10:30

To be clear newborn is always with me and it would be one of the other kids not both.

OP posts:
LIZS · 22/10/2014 10:31

so is she getting another certificate today, for how long ? Agree yabu to expect her back within the initial 2 week period , I'd misread assumed the babysitting was after that. Could you suggest a phased return ie. a couple of hours to see how it goes.

Original poster
pommedeterre · 22/10/2014 10:31

I didn't ask diaduit I am suggesting she could have offered to do it given she was up to babysitting.

Are you deliberately not reading my posts?

OP posts:
Original poster
pommedeterre · 22/10/2014 10:32

Babysitting was sat night

OP posts:
TheLovelyBoots · 22/10/2014 10:32

Now you know she's crafty and not to be trusted with money. If she's amazing with your toddlers, I'd let it go in the short-term (with a firm word) and start looking for someone else.

Original poster
pommedeterre · 22/10/2014 10:32

teeb - other than food yes. Kids used to her and spend lots of time with her and her cm mum and charges.

OP posts:
DiaDuit · 22/10/2014 10:33

So you didnt even ask her to do this for you but are upset she didnt offer to come off doctor advised sick leave to do one school run for you? Really? Confused

Teeb · 22/10/2014 10:34

Is it written in her contract that you pay over the odds for her sick pay, or is that just a generous offer on your behalf? If it's just off your own back I'd be reviewing it and dropping down to ssp.

DiaDuit · 22/10/2014 10:35

So babysitting sat night when she wouldnt have been at your house anyway and the child will have been sleeping? YABU

TheLovelyBoots · 22/10/2014 10:35

I would ignore DiaDuit.

Original poster
pommedeterre · 22/10/2014 10:35

I haven't even checked teeb as did not expect her to take piss.

dia - we've done this one before. I'm not replying to you anymore as you are not reading my posts.

OP posts:
GoodboyBindleFeatherstone · 22/10/2014 10:35

Where I used to work if you were off sick but seen out and about you would be called in for "a meeting" about "the situation" and being paid for doing another job (yep, even babysitting) would be a disciplinary offence.

I don't see why being a nanny should be much different.

DiaDuit · 22/10/2014 10:37

Ive read all your posts. YABU.

Teeb · 22/10/2014 10:37

Yep, she's chosen to do this work as it's more lucrative for her and it doesn't impact on her if she's off sick from your work because she gets the money either way. She's behaved very unprofessionally.

Shelby2010 · 22/10/2014 10:38

OP YANBU

  1. If the nanny felt up to some 'light' duties she should first have discussed with the OP if there was anything suitable she could do at her main job. Eg minding the sleeping baby while the OP went to the shops.
  1. As previous poster said, in any other job taking payment while off sick is seen as fraud and is a dismissible offence, unless agreed by your main employer.
  1. I would be annoyed if my babysitter took £40 & agreed to care for my children if they were only able to sit on the sofa. I would expect them to be capable of dealing with any situation that might arise, although in this case we don't actually have information about the babysitting job. For all we know she might have been getting 2 year old triplets fed, bathed & to bed.
Littlef00t · 22/10/2014 10:38

Presumably she doesn't work sat nights for you, therefore she did work in her own time. This may have contribute to her being iller but no different to me thinking I'm well enough to go out to dinner and realising I'm not.

You wouldn't have wanted someone recovering from an operation to look after your children surely, especially in the hospital recommended first 2 weeks.

I can see why this has narked you, and it would be out of order if during the time she is supposed to be working for you if she was well enough, but it wasn't.

Nanny0gg · 22/10/2014 10:39

DiaDuit

You've read all the posts but you seemed to have missed their points.

If you are being paid sick pay because you are unable to do a job then you have no business taking pay for doing another job. You are either fit for work or you're not.

Nanny0gg · 22/10/2014 10:40

And exactly what Shelby2010 said.

Are you going to speak to her pommedeterre?

googoodolly · 22/10/2014 10:40

YANBU at all, she's taking the piss, but I think it's because you're being too generous with sick pay, to be honest. Of course she's going to say she's not better if she can earn the same money at home as she does at work!

OutragedFromLeeds · 22/10/2014 10:42

I'm reading your posts and I still think YABU.

She's been signed off for two weeks.

She babysat for someone at night i.e. sat on a sofa that was not her own.

You're upset that she didn't call you the moment she felt up to sitting on a different sofa and offer to do a school run for you?

YABU.

If she'd done a school run for someone else - YANBU
If you'd asked her to babysit for you/sit with a sleeping child while you did the school run and she'd said no - YANBU
If you'd asked her to do a school run and she'd lied and said she was bed ridden - YANBU
The facts as they are - YABU.

DiaDuit · 22/10/2014 10:44

If you are being paid sick pay because you are unable to do a job

Taking sick pay from one employer because you are unable to do that specific job and the requirements of it. As i said- GPs can prescribe what work is and isnt ok and i can easily see a GP saying a night on the sofa is fine but daytime care of a preschooler isnt. Would you object to the woman making £40 from sitting on her sofa marking exam papers?

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