The US comedian Chris Rock said this a few years ago. Obviously it was a glib comedic response to the Monica Lewinsky scandal and the response by his male political opponents about how disgusting it was yet, it was very unlikely anyone was 'trying to blow them' in political office and if someone was trying, they'd probably do the same.
Obviously everyone is an individual and women cheat too so I'm not just talking about men but AIBU to think there's some truth in this?.
I see so many threads on MN about long (decades in some cases) relationships when an infidelity comes out of the blue. I don't believe that all of these men/women were unhappy in their relationship beforehand. I think most of them were.....before they were presented with another option.
Shirley Glass even says in her book about infidelity that people need to have strict boundaries about interpersonal relations outside of their romantic relationship, particularly with work mates. But isn't that saying that if someone has chance to spend enough time with someone else and there's mutual attraction, an affair will often follow?.
It's happened to friends of mine who have been devastated by apparent complete changes of character from the partner they thought would never be unfaithful.
I also know of partners that aren't cheating but do try it on with other people and if they weren't knocked back, they would be cheating!.
And I totally disagree with this idea that OW/OM cause the problem, 'offering it on a plate' or whatever. I think it's that the cheat probably wasn't presented with an alternative to their spouse/partner before and when they were - they went for it.
I am a bit world-weary I admit!. But often when I hear 'oh, they'd never cheat' I do sometimes think...maybe that's just because they don't have the opportunity.
AIBU?.